Two Pilot Marriages

[lifeguard]

INow grandkids, ahhhhhh....THAT will be a "Greatest Experience" for us.

My dad claims his are so great..he wishers he would have had them first!!!:laugh: But you are right..my little guy is only two.

 

[cezzna]

You can make anything work. My ex went over the rainbow a couple years back and I had to litigate her into supervised visitation. I have two GREAT kids the youngest with autism who attends thearapy 7 days a week. I'm lucky that I RON less than 20% of the year and have a great live in nanny.

Making it work, quit yer bitchin'

 

[Bobby Orr 4]

Is your nanny hot??

 

[capt. megadeth]

My ex went over the rainbow a couple years back

Making it work, quit yer bitchin'

You mean discovered she was a lesbian?

 

[Way2Broke]

I'm going to assume your children are VERY young. Heck, we have two, (one in Harvard, one at Stanford.....everyone else thinks they are great kids....WE know better), and we still count the years until we are "kid free". Greatest experience will be when they LEAVE HOME, or figure out how not to make us NOT pay for school!!!!

Now grandkids, ahhhhhh....THAT will be a "Greatest Experience" for us.

Thats simple, don't pay for it. I bet later down the road they wil appreciate it more. My parents helped with money for food sometimes, but all that did was afford me ramen noodles. The greatest power any parent has is the right to day NO. Don't lose it.

 

[i-no longer]

I agree totally with Standby 1. I'm ex-independence and am currently working desk jobs until I can get flying again. By the time I drop off my daughter at grandmas, and pick her up again at night.....well, we don't get much time together at all during the week. When I compare aviation to 9-5 type jobs, aviation is the way to go. As for how to make having a child work out, talk it over with both sets of grandparents to be. Then move if you need to. My mother surprised me by being the one to say she wanted to be "day" care. Grandma (and grandpa too) now have a special relationship with my daughter. Also, when daddy is home, he's primary care-giver all day, multiple days in a row.....how great is that for their relationship!

Good luck in whatever you decide to do Way2. All I know is that having a child is an extraordinary experience in so many ways, that it is worth any obstacles you might have work your way through!

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

Why don't you stay at home and be the primary 24/7? Grandparents can still have "special" relationships and the kid gets what he/she really needs... MOM! Also, you get what you want.... your child raised by your values.. not your grandparents... (there are differences...)

 

[FlyUnited]

Why doesn't HE stay home and she works? It's a personal decision.

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

Why doesn't HE stay home and she works? It's a personal decision.

Depends....

For the first 12-ish months the Mom should stay at home. Sorry girls, but you have the uterus and hormones that make nuturing so great...

But sure...HE can stay at home.... as long as one spouse is home.

I met a female airline pilot on the commute. Just met her and she told me how much her kids missed her, wondered why SHE had to leave for ovenight trips and she couldn't wait to get furloughed...

Personal decsison? Not when kids are a factor. It becomes a decision of sacrifice, priorities and what is best for the kids/family. Not really themes of ME-ism and feminism, it is anything but personal.

 

[i-no longer]

Rez, sure, in a perfect world with no bills it'd be great if one of us could stay home. At this point in our careers (he's with a regional, I've been unemployed) we're not making good enough money for that to be an option. We both changed careers late in life and have student loans plus to pay off. That being the case, aviation is still better than those 9-5 jobs. As for grandma taking care of her, I've no worries at all. She did a bang up job giving me my values....

But, my specific situation aside, I still feel that if neither pilot wants to give up his/her career you can still have a happy, healthy (just not "traditional") family.