Who is the biggest loser you have flown with?

[Kaman]

Hello,
Amazing some of the unique personailities and idosyncracies they have. i've been lucky where I work to fly with some really awesome guys/gals that I've learned alot from. Not alot of time for some of the silliness that you read about in this thread flying the Mighty Beech for 7 legs a day. Flew one the other day with no VCM and a weak ACM.
Anyway, I guess you can say that I'm an "aviation-geek" to some extent, but nothing to the extent that I've read about here! I have a large collection of books that I started as a kid, and continue here and there as I can afford it. My Dad was an Air Force pilot, and I was career Navy. It would seem that some of these people are insecure about themselves and that their whole identity is what they fly or do for a living. Uniform does not a pilot make and personally I was more comfy flying a Seneca doing freight in shorts, company shirt and flipflops!

Regards

ex-Navy Rotorhead

 

[Huck]

I shudder to think of the buzz I would have missed out on had I not lit up and gone for the O2 instead.

Now THAT's funny. Probably kept your transmissions short, too - you'd start blacking out after the third word....

OK here's my go at it:

- The guy that woke up and told me to quit reading.

- The guy that told me to land on the upwind side of the runway, so the crown would help me with drift.

- The MD11 captain who was convinced the aircraft was fly-by-wire (I had to open up the avionics hole and show him the cables).

- The ASA senior captain that got a letter from the CP, commanding him to stop collecting bag carts in ATL with his uniform on between legs. He was getting 25 cents a cart or something.

- The Gemini guy that passed out in the elevator of the Seoul Holiday Inn-Mapo on New years Eve ~2001. The Koreans saw him on the security camera, went in and covered him with a blanket. The other guests just stepped over him all night.

- The Fedex guy that briefs you before the flight: if I put the checklist on the center panel, I'll talk to you. If not, sterile cockpit.

 

[1.3XVso]

Your Da Man

Now I don't want to start a delta connection accademy bash here...ok maybe I do, but 95% of these guys are huge losers. I told this delta connection accademy fo that I am high mins. On the second flight, he coupled the flight guidence to his side like he was going to fly. First of all, I was going to let him fly, but after he did that I was like WTF![/]QUOTE



Best **CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED**ing thing you said man....

 

[Big Dog]

bump.

 

[FedEx1]

Huck:

The checklist turning guy? He's back in the left seat and all better now. Well, better anyway. Took a long time, but if you get him, cut him some slack.
Peace, brother....

Oh, P.S... there I was last week, in the condiment aisle at Schnuck's in Bartlett, (a suburb a good half an hour from the MEM airport) and lo and behold! I run into a fully uniformed Pinnacle captain. I had to scoot out of the aisle fast before I busted up laughing. Ok, at least he didn't have the hat on.

Um guys... Leave the tie and epilauttes in the car!

 

[Big Dog]

Gutter is a tool!

 

[nerdpilot]

I would say 40 percent of all pilots are total dorks wearing there stupid e6b watches hanging there cell phones and pagers and blackberrys and flashlights on there belts. Just love talking about flying and how they want to buy an airplane and how they play flight simulator at home. get a life. Anybody can be a pilot as long as you have enough money.

 

[Snakum]

- The Gemini guy that passed out in the elevator of the Seoul Holiday Inn-Mapo on New years Eve ~2001. The Koreans saw him on the security camera, went in and covered him with a blanket. The other guests just stepped over him all night.

LMAO! Not really dorkish ... but someone needs to clue him that college is over.

But still ... LMAO!


Minh

 

[Snakum]

Wow ... I knew my boss was a sweetie, but after reading some of these, I'm inclined to submit him for Sainthood.

I knew I had it good already ... but D@MN!

Minh

 

[exchexflyer]

Capt. that reaches for the gear handle and sits there with his/her hand on it until you say "Gear down". I usually wait until the last possible second just to piss them off.

I had an FO do this to me last week. If I'm doing something wreckless tell me. Don't put your hand on the da#n gear handle until I say, "gear down!" I've had captains do this occasionally, but an FO? Who does he think he is?

 

[mar]

I did this for a short time

When I made the move from single pilot ops into a crew environment I picked up a couple bad habits.

I noticed a few Capts putting their hands on the gear and flap handles before it was called for.

Seemed to be for two reasons:

1) A strong hint.
2) Just getting ready so that the device would be deployed at the instant it was called for.

So....I thought I might try this out and after a couple flights I decided that if the gear needed to be lowered a fraction of a second sooner than it takes for my hand to travel from my lap to the handle then we're in serious trouble.

So...I don't do this anymore. I think it's silly for an FO and rude for a Capt.

If (as Capt) you want the gear down so bad just say so. You're not gonna hurt my feelings.

P.S. I really want to tell some stories about Loser Pilots I've flown with but I don't think I can do so without being mean. So I'll keep my mouth shut.

 

[Huck]

He's back in the left seat and all better now.

Good to hear. I'll do it.

 

[belchfire]

(deleted due to extreme crulity to
lower life forms)



Nevermind...
It was about me.

 

[ABXbooger]

I was a very junior FO at a large regional back in the day. Overnighting in MSN, which is always a good time. Captain was notorious for being an ultra dork(he wore nomex gloves when flying) so when asked what I was doing for dinner, I said "I am not sure if I am going to dinner, I'll call you if go." Needless to say I was going out, but wasn't going to call. When I went down to leave the hotel for dinner, he was sitting there waiting on me, got up as if we had planned it...I was trapped.

Now the best part................................

He was wearing a powder blue leisure suit, no joke. With white shoes, no joke.
All blue with a blue fabric belt and all. I think it was polyester.

What a dinner, I will never forget.

 

[bandit110]

I had an FO do this to me last week. If I'm doing something wreckless tell me. Don't put your hand on the da#n gear handle until I say, "gear down!" I've had captains do this occasionally, but an FO? Who does he think he is?

I had the same thing happen two days ago. I first thought of this thread then I smiled at him and said I guess you want to to drop the gear.......Go ahead. Gear down.

 

[rcbullock]

I was a very junior FO at a large regional back in the day. Captain was notorious for being an ultra dork(he wore nomex gloves when flying)

He was wearing a powder blue leisure suit, no joke. With white shoes, no joke.
All blue with a blue fabric belt and all. I think it was polyester.

You know, this could be a good technique for keeping dorky FO's away. Be so ultra dorky, that even the real dork thinks he's too cool to hang with you.

'Course, I'm not trying to say anything...

It was a Zorro type outfit, like a figure skater would wear.

 

[1917Dr1]

Dork

I once flew with a guy who told me his favorite thing about aviation was walking through a terminal building in his uniform... He was a flight instructor :-(

 

[Ill Mitch]

Nah, its def Meatwad and MC Pee Pants!

Was MC Pee Pants the one doing it for the shorties? I forget...

 

[Prof. ATP]

We had a guy who made up things, like limitations. No remorse when you pulled out the manual and showed him that there was no such limitation for that a/c. He also had some bizarre theories about thunderstorms -- shoot, he had bizarre theories about EVERYTHING -- and I once had to take the aircraft away from him because he was going to fly into a sparking boomer rather than deviate toward a CU that "had a convex appearance indicating the possibility of convective activity commencing soon."

He went on to a freight feeder and I used to hear him on the radio air-filing BOTH IFR and VFR flight plans for a scheduled leg, spelling out his rather common last name phonetically, you know, Juliett Oscar November Echo Sierra.

Funny thing is, he is now an instructor at Flight Safety. That's the scariest thing about him.

 

[ATTCS]

I can't verify this but heard a story a few years ago about someone who left either UPS or FEDEX for a pax carrier 'because he wanted to walk through the terminal in uniform.'

 

[PCL_128]

I can't verify this but heard a story a few years ago about someone who left either UPS or FEDEX for a pax carrier 'because he wanted to walk through the terminal in uniform.'

Strange, I want to work for UPS so I don't have to walk through the terminal in uniform.

 

[Capt1124]

Strange, I want to work for UPS so I don't have to walk through the terminal in uniform.

When I was jumpseating I saw UPS pilots in the passenger terminal every Sunday, commercialing to work. In the *ugliest* uniforms known to man- it wasn't the brown uniform so much as the yellow shirt.

I'm sure the pay makes up for it, but just barely

 

[Caboclo]

OK, I had to register just so I could reply to this one. I had an SIC once who proudly takes his teddy bear with him on every flight!

 

[JohnnyReb]

I had a guy (Ray L) come work for us. Barely passed his check ride. I got very concerned and decided to ride with him on a run. In route from RIC to JQF he told me this long story about a guy landing at the wrong airport. Every single time we got a frequency change he messed it up and had to ask me! GOM requires you to write this **CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED** down! Then he proceeds to land at JQF without clearance. Needless to say I flew the last leg back to RDU myself, and sent Ray on his way.

Then there was this one guy (I have forgotten his initials) that tried to taxi a Seneca II with the parking brake engaged. He taxied from our ramp down to the departure end of 23R at RDU before he noticed anything wrong. He must have thought 2200 rpm for taxi was OK! Then he taxis back to our ramp.....by that time the brake pads are on fire! Well he grabs the fire extinguisher from the A/C and sprays the wheels....only the brake disks are so hot buy now (cherry red) that as soon as he stops spraying, they re-light like a trick birthday candle! Spray-flames-spray-flames-spray-flames, you get the idea...Thank god that maintenance saw what what was happening and ran out with the GIANT extinguisher (thank you Bill). The FIRST thing the pilot says after maintenance gets the fire out is "I better not get any **CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED** about this."

 

[YGBSM]

I had a guy (Ray L) come work for us. Barely passed his check ride. I got very concerned and decided to ride with him on a run. In route from RIC to JQF he told me this long story about a guy landing at the wrong airport. Every single time we got a frequency change he messed it up and had to ask me! GOM requires you to write this **CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED** down! Then he proceeds to land at JQF without clearance. Needless to say I flew the last leg back to RDU myself, and sent Ray on his way.

Then there was this one guy (I have forgotten his initials) that tried to taxi a Seneca II with the parking brake engaged. He taxied from our ramp down to the departure end of 23R at RDU before he noticed anything wrong. He must have thought 2200 rpm for taxi was OK! Then he taxis back to our ramp.....by that time the brake pads are on fire! Well he grabs the fire extinguisher from the A/C and sprays the wheels....only the brake disks are so hot buy now (cherry red) that as soon as he stops spraying, they re-light like a trick birthday candle! Spray-flames-spray-flames-spray-flames, you get the idea...Thank god that maintenance saw what what was happening and ran out with the GIANT extinguisher (thank you Bill). The FIRST thing the pilot says after maintenance gets the fire out is "I better not get any **CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED** about this."

Landing without clearance may score badly in the biggest loser "flown with" competition.

You may be eligible though.

 

[Way2Broke]

Okay, you can all praise me for starting this thread now...... hahaha just kidding. Keep up the good work!

 

[JohnnyReb]

Landing without clearance may score badly in the biggest loser "flown with" competition.

You may be eligible though.

LOL!

You wouldn't happen to be one of the "losers" I fired over the years would you?

 

[pullmyfinger]

The American Eagle FO at DFW parading around the terminal last friday with 2 (yes TWO) cellphones and a black berry strapped on his belt, Breitling watch and starbucks... Hat cocked to the side.

Dude.. you looked like the maytag man who won the lottery. To answer your question, hell no Ive never thought of the regionals. Dont you guys make like 18,000 a year?

Didnt fly with the guy but has to be one of the biggest dingleberries Ive ever seen...

 

[NuGuy]

Ahh, the zombie thread returns!


Anyway, my $0.02...

Flew with a guy that would pack burned out light bulbs, so he could swap them out with the good ones at the hotel.

Flew with a guy that had more eye-boogers than a persian cat. We had to share rooms at this particular sh!tbag regional, and not only did this guy stink like a smoking room, he snored like trucks downshifting on the highway. Beyond that, he was a pretty good guy.

Flew with a guy who insisted his whole family were aliens. Not the Mexican variety, either, he had pictures of them in Lost-in-Space type spacesuits.

Flew with a guy that would drink super big-gulps of diet mountain dew, then complain when we held going into Big Metro Airport (a regular occurance).

I guess we all have stuff we do that makes us dorks (as posting on Flightinfo is clearly evidence of), but at least we recognize it for what it is. True dorks are oblivious to what makes them dorks.

Nu

 

[:-)]

Now the best part................................

He was wearing a powder blue leisure suit, no joke. With white shoes, no joke.
All blue with a blue fabric belt and all. I think it was polyester.

What a dinner, I will never forget.

I may know this guy. If so, he wore the same blue leisure suit to his UAL interview (preferential). No, he didn't get hired.

Hobbes