Who is the biggest loser you have flown with?

[PCL_128]

Wow, I don't think anybody can top that one.

 

[Workin'Stiff]

LMAO!!!! That was brutal....

 

[siouxicide]

DC8, I guess I had that one comin. haha Here's one for ya....
Q:What's the difference between a NDSU cheerleader and an elephant???
A:About 50 lbs.
Q:How do you make them equal?
A:Force-feed the elephant.


Powercurve, you gotta be kidding!! Are you sure that guy wasn't "special"? I'd hate to be the guy that hired him.

 

[AV8OR]

Biggest Loser:

Flew the Frankenbeech at the time BE1900D for a midwest commuter. This was back in the late 90's...

Captain was on "forced reserve" by management because if he had a line every single copilor would call in sick on his line. I was on reserve so was forced to fly with him.

Wore his hat AND headset in the car, was seen at a gas station this way, too.

Made up HIS OWN checklist responses to the "before start" checklist.
FO: Battery
Captain: XX Volts
This guy... "Ship's Battery XX volts and ready for turning
and showing a good charge"

Unpinned his wings off of his uniform blazer and wore them on his leather pilot jacket to bars. WITH flight bag. I think he even pulled his epaulets off and stuck those on, too.

Carried this little duffle bag o' goods under his feet with binoculars, an A.M. radio station guide for the ADF, and a camera. He would suddenly swing the camera your way and snap a shot of you without even asking.

He sweated profusely and would use sani-coms to swab his bald head and fatty neck. He smelled, too.

Had to fly a few charters with him and he said, after he did the takeoff "you can have the rest of this leg". Like it was a gift. Told me, "The charter passengers will want to see the Captain fly" on the way home, to placate me, said "Hey, if you want to get in a couple of steep turns, go ahead!" What?? You're kidding, right?

Claimed United Airlines would hire him as soon as he got an interview because when he was 5 years old, he had written them a letter saying he wanted more than anything to work for UAL. They had written him back saying he was welcome to have a job when he had the qualifications. As far as he was concerned, that letter was his "guarantee" of a job. No kidding... he planned on going to the interview and handing them that letter and saying,
"I'd like my job now"

I actually jumped for joy when I heard he had been hired at a small jet airline in the midwest! Woo-Hoo!

Lo-hooo-hoooo-ser!

Holy smokes! That-is-Incredible. That's one of the most distgustingly hillarious things I have ever heard. I dare anyone to try and top that. Don't think it's possible. Thanks for sharing.

 

[Gulfstream 200]

yeah that one wins.

dear god I hope you made it up.

 

[Way2Broke]

Man I started this thread thinking I had it bad, that blows goats dude.

 

[Flyin Tony]

fo who on weekends and off duty puts on full uniform hat included and goes shopping at wal-mart to pick up chicks

HAHAHAHAH LMFAO

 

[kingaira90]

one for you

Biggest Losers I have run into....

3. FO I had, who upon finding out I called in fatigued and told dispatch that we would go to the hotel at the next station, decided to call them back behind my back and tell them I changed my mind. Just so we could reposition to a place with better strip clubs.

4. Same FO, who decided it was appropriate cockpit conversation to talk about how he only likes to have anal sex.

5. Same FO yet again who would take a good 40-45 minutes to get downstairs at the hotel when we have a 20 minute callout.

A theme with this guy. Maybe the 40-45 min to the lobby was due to the in room pay per view activity? You did deprive him of the better strip clubs ;-)




6. Multiple FO's that ask why I don't want to go to a major.....when finding out I wanted to fly for UPS/FDX, etc.....WTFO!?

Wow. Gotten that one from people after they ask what I do for a living, not someone actually in aviation though.






Had a fellow FO at a company I work for that would wear his uniform shirt and pants (minus epaulets I believe) on a saturday night date with his new gf. When someone pulled him to the side and said wtf, his reply was "just trying to get laid".

He was also a gem that would tell you without you asking that he was typed in the c-500 just before producing his certificate, with a concocted story about how this was possible. In reality he bought it and had no time associated with the type. His total time would vary by hundreds of hours depending on who he was talking to (600-1400hrs), 600 ballpark was correct.

He would also tell stories about when he was a cop and all of the investigations he was on and all the excitement, had to retire b/c he had seen too much (he was 19 or 20 at the time). In reality he was a "reserve" volunteer officer for the local small town police force (the type that do extra security at big local events). An overall tool that liked to talk about his fabricated reality.

Annoying at the time but funny to look back on.

 

[PowerCurve]

It's sad but true. Every word of it. Anyone who used to work at my old commuter will instantly recognize who it was.

I'm sure I could try to remember more, but I have chosen to try to forget! At least it was good fodder for airline interviews when they say, "Have you ever had a conflict with a Captain?'

 

[TIGV]

Had a skipper freeze up on a tower assigned Go-Round, given at 300ft AGL on the ILS 12R into Lambert, was my leg, ended up doing the radio and everything else myself, he didn't say a word just took the transfer after touchdown, taxiid in, packed his she-aht and went home, weird.
I mean I've flown with some tools and have myself flown like a tool but that one stands out.