Stupid questions asked at airshows

[bearcat]

Standard A-10 questions/comments

Is that the gun? (pointing to the 7 30 mm carrles at the front of the airplane!)

This plane saved my ass in Nam

Why is it so Ugly? Response - I don't think it is ugly

DO they still fly these?

How many pilots?

They get more interesting as the beer is consumed. Fun actually.

 

[freddriver20]

Standing on a C-5 at numerous airshows, this beaut gets asked EVERY time:

"Can you land this plane on an aircraft carrier??"

Second place: "How many of them big tanks can you load in here??"

"You mean the M-1A1?" (129,000 lbs)

"Yeah, that one."

"Normally one, two in a contingency operation."

"Aw, man, is that all??"

Hagar, you forgot the other C-5 questions! "Can i go up to the cockpit?" "No, we don't let anyone up the ladder for liability reasons". "Then why does she get to go up?" - points to hot girl going up ladder with crewmember close behind - "ohh......well she's his.....sister!"

 

[SIG600]

"ohh......well she's his.....sister!"

Shack!!!

 

[A-10_JetMech]

On an A-10 at an open house at Elmendorf AFB a guy asked what the two big
pods were on the back of the aircraft. The 1st Lt. looked at him dumbfounded
an just said " Those are the engines!" He should have told him they were travel pods for the extra pilots. The guy would have probably believed him.

 

[BSlapped]

At PAtrick Air Force Base show in the early 90's, we were checking out an A-4 when a man and his son walk up to the plane. The dad tried to sound as knowledgable as possible when he announced to his son that this was a Harrier jump jet and it can take off and land vertically and that's how they got it in that exact spot. He then turned to the pilot who was standing there and told the pilot to explain to his son how the Harrier takes off and lands vertically.

He just said, "It's not a Harrier, man, It's a Skyhawk!"

The dad did not relent and said, "Well can you explain how it takes off vertically?"

The pilot replied, "This plane doesn't take off vertically!"

Dad says, "How do you know?"

To which the pilot responds, "I've been flying these for years and, trust me, the engine only points backwards!"

The man left when he saw several people in the crowd laughing at this exhange.

 

[RJP]

... all of the little zipperheads had left...

That's nice. You realize that it's not 1942, right?

Oh, you might want to pick up some kneepads to help those sore knees. :beer:

 

[pilot141]

That's nice. You realize that it's not 1942, right?

Oh, you might want to pick up some kneepads to help those sore knees. :beer:

You realize he posted that on Sep 3rd, right?

You might want to pick up some ass-pads, because this thread has been sitting on it's ass for a while. Make sure the ass-pads are the "Extra-Righteous" version, though.

 

[RJP]

You realize he posted that on Sep 3rd, right?

You might want to pick up some ass-pads, because this thread has been sitting on it's ass for a while. Make sure the ass-pads are the "Extra-Righteous" version, though.

You realize not everyone reads the crap here every day?

Wanna tell me where you buy your special ass-pads? Besides, i wasn't talking to you anyway.

RJP stand for Righteous Japanese Protector.

 

[FN FAL]

You realize not everyone reads the crap here every day?

Wanna tell me where you buy your special ass-pads? Besides, i wasn't talking to you anyway.

He's talking about those tear off paper thingies like they have on the nose bridge of those eye test machines they have at DMV and the AME...he's a germaphobe so he wants you plant one those pads on your mat so he dasn't get his eyebrows mussed.

 

[caliman]

I was at the Interanational Air Tatoo in England in a C-5. They wanted to know the max weight of the C-5. I rounded up to 800,000 pounds and they looked at me the same way they might look at you if you ordered a Quarter Pounder. They wanted it in tons, so with my quick "pilot math" I came up with 4,000 tons. It was late on the first day that I realized that the look of shock and awe on their faces was due to the fact that I was telling them 8,000,000 pounds. It's only 1 zero, right?