What's the dumbest question you've been asked as a pilot?

[stewardess71]

On one of my first flights at Eagle, I was asked by a pax where I stayed last night on the layover. I turned to him and said "the Captain's room. I have also been asked how much I make, when will I get to work on the bigger planes, and how many legs I do a day.

 

[Corona]

Me (a bit irritated): What is that over there? [Pointing to large body of salt water off the right wing]

Student (currently lost and characteristically clueless): Is that the Pacific?

I kid you not...

C

 

[Corona]

Had a classic question just yesterday; thanks to one of our Flightinfo member's signatures for my response. I was giving sightseeing rides in a 172 heavy.

Pax: You're really a pilot? You can really fly that thing?

Me: Yep; well, I try...sure are a lot of switches and things...

C

 

[wanabe_fo]

ppl helps

I had a guy stop me during my walkthru on the B1900 once and tell me he had his private pilots license and if we needed help we could call him.

I was commuting from HPN to ALB in uniform. The airport was socked in most all day. I walked over to the gate agent and asked if she could print the weather forecast for me. She said yes but that she did not know how to read them. I once again asked her to print them because I could read them. She then responded in complete confusion, "I thought they only taught the captain how to read those things".

I was commuting on Coex from CLT to IAH in uniform, I was sitting in 1A. The captain had gotten up to go to the lav. I was feeling a little mischievous so I got up a few seconds later and walked to the back of the plane. So now everyone has seen the capt walk into the lav and me standing there waiting. There was a look on some people’s faces that was priceless. Then someone finally asked, if both of you are here who is flying the plane. I told them the auto pilot and a blow up doll like you see on the airplane movies.

 

[FedExFlyer]

Q: Who do you fly for?

A: FedEx

Q: Oh. Isnt that cargo? Do you have your application in to United and Delta so you can make a living?

A: Ummmmmmmmm.....NO

 

[C425Driver]

I used to fly Part 135 in Southern New England. Shortly after JFK, Jr. died I had many people ask, "Are we going to end up like JFK?"

The charter company that I worked for had several seaplanes which promted the question, "Can this plane land in the water, too?" I was flying a Baron. I would tell them, "Yep. Once!"

"When are you going to fly a real airplane?"
"I didn't realize this one was fake!"

From someone who was riding in the right seat of the Baron so he could build time on the empty legs: With 4 passengers sitting right behind us, he pointed at something on the instrument panel and said in a loud voice, "What's that? I've never seen one of those before!" I was speechless.

I flew a local reporter and his cameraman to MVY the morning after JFK crashed. They were pretty quiet going out there but when we landed he went into reporter mode:

Him: "How far could you see when we were flying over here"
Me: "The visibility was 5 miles"
Him: "How close did we come to the search and rescue area"
Me: "We were 15 miles away from the area"
Him: "So tell me what activity you saw in the recovery area"
Me: "We were 15 miles away and the visibility was 5 miles, I saw nothing"
Him: "What do you think happened to JFK"
Me: "It's too early to tell. It would be irresponsible for anyone to speculate at this time"
Him: "I'm not asking you to speculate, just want your opinion of what happened"
Me: "I have to go now"
That reporter now works for CNN.


Flying eastbound at 7500' over Long Island Sound. The Connecticut shoreline was on our left. My passenger asked if that was Europe on the right. When we informed her that is was Long Island she didn't ask any more questions.

At the airline, I got the usual questions that people listed on here. I had a passenger insist that we not waste time getting deiced first thing in the morning because is was just frost on the wings and not ice.

After diverting to Pensacola from Tallahassee due to a thunderstorm over the field, a passenger informed us the we could have landed in TLH because we could fly under the storm, just not through the storm. (Oh, how I love the experts in the back of the airplane!)

For more stupid questions and comments do a search for the many TSA-hole threads. Those guys ask more stupid questions than anyone else!

C425Driver

 

[Under Fire]

What's the dumbest question I've been asked as a pilot?.....Let me think.......Ah yes....

"Who's the suckiest Captain you have ever flown with at XJ"

yeah that would have to do it...

TOOL...:uzi:

 

[difete]

An old lady neighbor was congratulating a buddy of mine who was in uniform for all the effort he was doing flying over there in Iraq.

 

[CRJDog]

1. What time does the 2 o'clock flight leave?

2. Is this airplane safe?

I once got a military discount at the cleaners to dry-clean my uniform.

On another occasion I was smoking a cigarette in front of a hotel waiting for the van and this old man gets out of his jag and throws his keys at me. If I only had the time. If I knew the way to the airport I would have taken his car to the airport and left it on the curb.

 

[say again]

Aren't you afraid about the plane crashing???? All the time dip $hit, welcome aboard.

Will the wings fall off?? I sure hope not.

Have you been drinking???? Obviously not enough!!!!

 

[ThisistheDream]

stupidest question I have had is? You make only how Much? WOW I thought pilots made more than that, thats how much I make as they laugh.....

 

[atrdriver]

Almost every time I'm standing in front of the airport smoking someone will pull up and ask if they can park there "for just a minute". I always say yes, the time limit's 30 minutes...

 

[av8orboy]

Will you really call me when your in town again?

 

[BOHICAgain]

if anything happens to you can the FA land the plane?

As we stand right infront of a gate wating for the FA...a pax comes up and asks where the las vegas flight was.... I point to the gate right in front with a
Las Vegas NV. She tells me no the Las vegas Uthat flight.

 

[LowlyPropCapt]

This is true, I swear...

From my flight instructing days, since most of the stupid questions I get asked around the airport have been covered in the previous pages:

After spending an extremely long time planning a cross country flight, my private pilot student asks:

"So where are we going?"

Me: "Michelbob's, they have great BBQ."

Student: "No, the airport, what's the name of the airport we are going too?"

Me: "Naples... Didn't you just plan a flight there?"

Student: "Yeah... Where is it agian?"

This was the beginning of a very long day.

 

[Green]

We don't make sh&t anymore as a profession and we work our collective b$tts off. But at least we can feel smug and superior when somebody who makes at least twice as much as us (metro bus driver for instance) asks us a question.


For instance everybody should know that the original Piedmont name was given to Henson airlines. It says so on about 55 dhc-8's in little letters right by the airstair door.

 

[Truckdriver]

About a year ago myself and the crew were riding to the hotel in the hotel van. As we were carrying on the normal van driver/crew conversation, the van driver turns and asks, "so what do you do for a living?" We were in full uniform and he even asked us if we were Continental when he picked us up. That hands down is the dumbest question I've ever been asked and it completly ruined my "there are no dumb questions" attitude.

 

[Positive Rate]

What's the dumbest question I've been asked as a pilot?.....Let me think.......Ah yes....

"Who's the suckiest Captain you have ever flown with at XJ"

yeah that would have to do it...

TOOL...:uzi:

Ahhh you must be one of those guys "they" talk about being the suckiest...

 

[vballindaytona]

I fly 135 Freight, Lear20 series. I am 25 yrs old, flying w/ a 33 yr old captain.

person who picked up frieght: "so do you always fly with your dad on his trips?"

nice, ya jackass, he had me when he was 7 yrs old.

 

[sclark161]

Flew with an FO the other day who's Aunt asked him:

"Are you the FO or the Other Guy"

"I'm...the other guy"