Two people in Aviation with Kids. Does it work?

[satpak77]

Thanks for the advice, but I think you are thinking a little deep for me. Sure it hurts that I grew up without a father but I am very, very happy in my life. There is nothing I want for and I really don't think I need to read into it and get myself thinking I need help for something I really don't think about but thanks for the advice.

Hey, great. Just remember that CRM was born out of rigid dominating Captains who barked orders and ruled with an iron fist. If they said they were configured for approach, then they were by God.

Now, CRM teaches that everyone helps each other and watches each others actions.

You may not "need to read into it" by your definition, but, lets ask, "but maybe I do." Or "hmm, lets took a look at this." I know I am not the first person on the entire planet to recommend you do the things in my posts. Others have said it to you. Maybe not today, but over the course of life, it has been recommended.

The world will not stop spinning now will the sun be extinguished if you try something revolutionary called self reflection.

 

[satpak77]

I find it funny that you guys think it's a WOMAN pilot thing when in fact, it's not. I was a nurse for 8 years and even if that was my career, I would keep working if I had kids. Unfortunately in this career, you cannot just quit, come back 10 years later and pick up where you left off. You guys act like it's so easy. "Oh, just quit". If it was that easy and I could take off for 5-10 years, accrue longevity, keep my seniority and go back later, I would. Think about yourselves....would it be that easy for you to just quit forever? You don't have to worry about it because you can just have your wife do that. If it was you that needed to quit, would it be that easy for you?

It appears your believe that this thread is about you. It is not. It is about the kids.

Observe the original post asked "Does it work?" Well, it may work for the two airline parents. But it may fail for the kids.

You also appear to associate the word "wife" with "second class citizen", as in "let the wife do that".

It is difficult for you to relate because you are

1) Not a mother
2) Not a wife
3) Probably Don't want to be "someones wife." Or if you do, you will answer "He is my husband" and will unlikely answer "I am his wife"

I think we have explored a lot of issues on this thread, and no one is being disrespectful. I could be 100% wrong in my observations, but I think I am probably 70-80% correct on everything.

(And I have never met you)

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

I find it funny that you guys think it's a WOMAN pilot thing when in fact, it's not. I was a nurse for 8 years and even if that was my career, I would keep working if I had kids. Unfortunately in this career, you cannot just quit, come back 10 years later and pick up where you left off. You guys act like it's so easy. "Oh, just quit". If it was that easy and I could take off for 5-10 years, accrue longevity, keep my seniority and go back later, I would. Think about yourselves....would it be that easy for you to just quit forever? You don't have to worry about it because you can just have your wife do that. If it was you that needed to quit, would it be that easy for you?

We don't act like its easy..... we've just searched out spouses who are willing to do the "dirty work." The homemaking and the child raising.... Although I did pick and drop off at the schoolbus stop, went grocery shopping and went to the dry cleaners and fabric store today. Then I painting the outside of the house and after dinner washed dishes.... but enough about me...!!

The tough nut to crack is to find the husband who wants to stay at home.... ergo the female pilot paradox.... Don't get me wrong. I enjoy female pilots. They fly well and bring a refreshing change to the immature testasterone that oozes the crewroom. I enjoyed meeting Jerry Mock, a true aviatrix....

Life is about choices and sacrifices. You can have fun along the way!

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

Similar to a guy who has been homeless his whole life. Give him public housing, a roof, and four walls, and a lock on the front door, and life is great.

However he does not know the life of the suburbs, with stainless steel appliances, green yards, etc (you get the idea). So he has no performance measure above and beyond "life is fine" from his vantage point of the public housing. To him, that is a huge improvement over his previous life.

Viktor Frankl, in his book "the meaning of life" discussed this "realitivity of cicumstance." A train of Jews headed to a concentration camp... but which camp? The hard labor or the extermination camp... As the trained crossed the switch it veered towards and went to the hard labor camp. Incarcerated, sick and emaceated Jews on a Nazi train jumping and dancing for joy.....life is good!

 

[capt. megadeth]

I know I am not the first person on the entire planet to recommend you do the things in my posts. Others have said it to you. Maybe not today, but over the course of life, it has been recommended.

Actually you are but there is nothing wrong with that. I don't usually talk to people about it (except my honey) because I don't think about it often.

 

[capt. megadeth]

Rez and satpak.....

I have a question for you. Let's say your wife told you one day that she wanted to go back to work and let's just say she could start off making exactly what you are making right now. She said that she would really want you to quit your job and stay home with the kids and she would be the breadwinner. What would you say/do? Be honest please.

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

Rez and satpak.....

I have a question for you. Let's say your wife told you one day that she wanted to go back to work and let's just say she could start off making exactly what you are making right now. She said that she would really want you to quit your job and stay home with the kids and she would be the breadwinner. What would you say/do? Be honest please.

Beat her.


JUST KIDDING!!!! C'mon ...you women are so sensitive...it was a JOKE!

That is allot of conditional IFs....

What if she came home and said I found a better man. Or she said, I want to BE a man..... What will I do if she dies?

Our lives aren't controlled and orchestrated as much as we want them to be.... The exciting, mysterious, and somewhat scarey part of marriage is people grow and change over the years... Who one marries today is a different person in ten years.

Having a pilots schedule we try and create a stable simple lifestyle for our family. If we push it too much we will find ourselves too committed (two airline careers?) and no easy way out. Once a family enjoys descretionary income it is hard to give it up. Who would want to?

There are too many curve balls that life throws at us. Keeping it simple makes it easier to handle the things we can't control.

But you want an answer...

To keep the family together I'd quit flying. Easier said than done...especially hypothetically. I'd be better off if she wanted a pitot tube instead....

 

[satpak77]

Rez and satpak.....

I have a question for you. Let's say your wife told you one day that she wanted to go back to work and let's just say she could start off making exactly what you are making right now. She said that she would really want you to quit your job and stay home with the kids and she would be the breadwinner. What would you say/do? Be honest please.

Well, based on my marriage, if my wife could earn what I earn, and I could stay home, I would.

Period, end of story. But I can't breast feed, so we have a problem there.

Ultimately "what is best for the family" must be asked tho, not for me, or for her.

 

[capt. megadeth]

Fair enough. Thanks.

 

[highsky]

For those of you blessed with being raised in Beaver Cleaver households, and those of you raising families in the optimal family situations where mom and dad and everyone is happy and stable, CONGRATULATIONS; Gee, if we could only be like you...

For the rest of us, 80%, who have grown up in, and continue to be involved in, unstable relationships, we need to look at reality.

My mom had a choice: Put up with a two-timing husband for the rest of her life, or go to law school to become a lawyer so that she didn't have to raise her kids in a double-wide on a teacher's salary.

Could she have made it work on a teacher's salary? Sure. And I sure as hell wouldn't be a pilot today. Have you checked the cost of pilot training lately?

Any smart woman (and man) looking at the ODDS can quickly realize that it makes most sense for the woman to work. For the KIDS sake AND both SPOUSES sake. There is nothing wrong with that. There is also nothing wrong with the woman staying home to take care of the kids, for those lucky 20% of you who are lucky enough to have such a stable situation. BUT, if you are one of those, it's mighty pious of you to cast shame on the rest of us. SO, shut the fukc up! Let the rest of us make due, with the circumstances that have befallen us, IN PEACE and support.