Toilet Seat Cover question

[crashpad]

Just remember:
the lav is a "teepee for you to peepee...not a wigwam to beat your tomtom".

 

[rumrnr78]

I've never actually used one of the seat condoms....I'm still doing the hover dump....Keeps me physically fit with muscle contraction in the glutes and quads, and my ass from whatever alien life forms are on the seat....but to answer your question, I thought it went to back for flushing purposes...

Hilarious thread by the way...EVERYONE on this forum has been in the grumbly in the tummy situation....

Beav- You would love it here in Asia, the squat toilet is all the rage!

Cheers-

 

[livin'thesim]

A real regional pilot can use jedi mind tricks on his GI tract and hold off till the hotel.....

"This is not the exit you are looking for."

 

[belchfire]

The moral of the story? I now skip JO’s free food it’s better for me in the long run.

JO gave something away?

YGBSM!!!

 

[JustaNumber]

A couple of years ago our outfit put on a feed for the crew and rampers who had to work on Thanksgiving. I got there a bit late but managed to scrape enough off of the trays to make a plate full and took it back to the airplane. Now fast-forward about 24 hours to the last leg of my trip. While on the arrival about 100 miles out I got the first indication that I might be in for some trouble.

Man I tell you what, buy short final I was sweating bullets! I taxied so fast I don’t even think the spoilers retracted on the wings until I hit the ramp check point. Then guess what? Yep! Ramp told us to hold because our gate was still occupied. Buy this point I was in tears as we taxied to the hold ramp. I set the brakes and told my now amused F/O he had the controls while calling F/A #1 to tell her I was coming out. My ass cheeks were clenched so tight I damn near took the seat cushion with me as I jumped up and opened the flight deck door. Much to my chagrin the door banged loudly against the F/A jump seat. In a high pitched voice I told the dizzy cow to please stow said seat so I could open the #%#!(* door!

Finally! I leap into the forward lav and commence to make some serious ass mud. I mean you know you have some good head pressure when the spring loaded toilet flap is banging furiously against the back of the tank. Noise? I was about as subtle as a Jake brake on a Freight Liner going down Donner Pass. Smell? I could have knocked a buzzard off a sh*t wagon at twenty paces!

About ten minuets later I came out red faced and feeling rung out like a dishrag. In the front row was an elderly couple glaring daggers at me as I slinked back to the flight deck.

The moral of the story? I now skip JO’s free food it’s better for me in the long run.

C'mon. Nobody else said it?

I'll let someone else do the honors.

Mesa....

 

[urflyingme?!]

I was working three Turkey Days ago in ORD for mesa. When we got there all that was left was stuffing. Thinking I was hilarious I brought three plates of stuffing back to the plane. Much to my surprise the poor FA's just started digging in to their cold, stuffing only meal, making noises I had previously imagined only coming from some sort of Saharan predator at feeding time. I felt like I was going to puke watching those poor emaciated girls shoveling what was by this point day old stovetop so the Captain and I took them inside for a hot meal.

Which leads me to my next question: How do you get a Mesa Flight Attendant home with you? A ham sandwich...

 

[JustaNumber]

I was working three Turkey Days ago in ORD for mesa. When we got there all that was left was stuffing.

Guys, guys, . . .

What does Mesa do?

 

[skidbuggy]

...... and wiping the sweat from my brow...

I hope you used a different piece of toilet paper.

 

[Rekks Inbound]

Guys, guys, . . .

What does Mesa do?

OK, I'll play:
SUCK!!!!!!


Happy now?!

Peace.

Rekks

 

[Metro752]

Which leads me to my next question: How do you get a Mesa Flight Attendant home with you? A ham sandwich...

These days it seems to work for a number of ladies.