Man Laws...Pilot Laws

[embpic1]

Do not, under any circumstances, bang your flight attendant.

Yup, I am guilty of this. Banged her. Dated her. Married her. Turned out pretty well actually.

 

[Goose Egg]

Law #5: Do not start threads on flightinfo about manliness. (Sort of in the same vein as "If you have to ask, you can't afford it." only it's "If you have to start a thread about manliness, you're not manly.")

#6: Calling the CRJ-900 the "9" is fine in the proper context. I mean, what are you expecting here? That, when asked what airplane they fly, people snap to attention, salute, and yell out "Sir yes sir! I fly the Bombardier Canadair Regional Jet 900 series sir!" Get of your moral high horse already. It's just an airplane.

 

[JumpersAway]

If the calling of the "nine" is an issue, then so should the calling of the EMB 170/175 "The Mini Bus".

The ''9'' should be reserved for the DC-9. I'll buy off on that. Quit trying to bait and switch the turd you fly.

 

[Club ORD FO]

If you are the captain, and the PNF, you may not put your hands on the flaps until I call for it.

Yeah I see your hand there, and no I'm not gonna ask for flaps 8. So you might as well relax

 

[jws717]

If you are the captain, and the PNF, you may not put your hands on the flaps until I call for it.

Yeah I see your hand there, and no I'm not gonna ask for flaps 8. So you might as well relax

I had one turd bag who would retract the flaps before i called for it after takeoff. I wanted to break his arm.

 

[knewhigher]

must avoid any IMC (inadvertent man contact) when doing flows or transferring the throttles.

unless you say "man touch"

 

[hockeypilot44]

A very common conversation:

"You're a pilot? Who do you fly for?"
"Delta."
"What plane do you fly?"
"Embraer 170."
"Delta doesn't fly Embraer 170's. I guess you fly for Republic."
"I didn't realize you're in the industry also. That's correct. I fly for Shuttle America under the Delta Connection paint job."

 

[Motive Flow]

unless you say "man touch"

That reminds me:

Do not get caught in child sex sting.

 

[embpic1]

If you are the captain, and the PNF, you may not put your hands on the flaps until I call for it.

Yeah I see your hand there, and no I'm not gonna ask for flaps 8. So you might as well relax

If I am starting to get uncomfortable about an FO's flap schedule, I will place my hand on the flap lever as a hint. If they still don't get the message I will say 'How about flaps --'. Don't take it the wrong way. It is just a nonverbal way of saying 'I think you need some flaps'. If you have a problem with that then you can handle it how you want when you are the captain.

 

[Amish RakeFight]

If I am starting to get uncomfortable about an FO's flap schedule, I will place my hand on the flap lever as a hint. If they still don't get the message I will say 'How about flaps --'. Don't take it the wrong way. It is just a nonverbal way of saying 'I think you need some flaps'. If you have a problem with that then you can handle it how you want when you are the captain.

Sure... just don't put you hand on leg, Holmes. I'll start to get uncomfortable and will take it the wrong way.