I have never...

[LR25]

Land without a landing clearance,,,,oops.

You know, you have been flying all night, you call the tower, they say call me on a 2 mile final or left base or whatever.

So there you are, tired, staring at the brightly lit runway. Basically vegitating on a 2 mile final, landing checklist complete, 3 green, ready to come aboard, a smooth greaser of a landing and then the tower says, ohh by the way, you are cleared to land.

Im not saying I did this.

 

[Typhoon1244]

Land without a landing clearance...Im not saying I did this.

Nobody's done that...but one morning at DFW, my father's F/O switched over to departure while they were sitting in position on 17R...during rush hour. Went on for three minutes. By the time dad figured out what happened, the guy in the tower was hysterical.

I've never done anything like that, though...like changing center frequencies and forgetting to check on. No, never.

 

[Twotter76]

I've never ordered some airport Burger King on tower frequency late at night when attempting to obtain food on company frequency. Dont know who would do such a thing.

 

[dgs]

...called in-range on 121.5.

Anybody else notice how many in-range calls start out on guard now that everybody has it tuned into their secondary radio? It makes me wish for the military UHF radio with a built in guard receiver and a wafer switch setting for transmitting on guard.

 

[mar]

I've never...

...preflighted the wrong airplane when it's 20 below...

....arrgh

 

[RJFlyer]

What was her name? (I think she may be at my company now...)

Good gawd I hope not, they're all geriatric!

 

[414Flyer]

I have never left the checklist on the cowling and then started the plane.

oh and never forgot to untie the tail.

Or listened to tower, and heard them give a special frequency to talk to an airline to give them a personal message. Then of course I never forgot to switch back to the real tower frequency before callling up tower. BUSTED!

 

[Jeff G]

I've never asked for a takeoff clearance on the PA... and then got irritated "on freq" when there was no reply. Don't know who would do such a thing.

I've also never left the radar on pulling into the gate, and thus nuked a ramp worker... but I've seen it done.

I've never dinged a wingtip trusting the guy with the wands knowing more than my own eyes...

I've never transmitted a funny sound file on center frequency trying to amplify it through the intercom speakers.

Keep this up; this is fun.

 

[Cornelius]

I'll go for it,

I never read non-aviation related material while on the flight deck

I never study the overhead panel (EMB-120) for prolonged periods of time with my eyes shut

I never completely block the windshield to block the intense summer sun

I never get the aural warning unit to say "HIGH SPEED"

I never accidentally got the electrical system to go into 1st stage auto-transfer

I always use the checklist when crossfeeding

 

[Typhoon1244]

I never get the aural warning unit to say "HIGH SPEED."

Bonus points if you've never let it happen while you had your mike keyed...on approach control...below ten.

Okay, for all you current and ex-Brasilia drivers:

I have never...

...shut the airplane down with the back-up battery still on.

...had the power levers past the flight idle stop during taxi.

...cruised half-way to Lawton Oklahoma with the flaps at 15.

...or the props at 100.

...seen pornography behind the yoke pinion cover.

Or better yet...

...pulled off the yoke pinion cover and found behind it an obnoxious comment about the captain sitting next to me!

Bill Kenas: lover of sheep and your mom.
"Hey Bill, did you see this?"

Oh, and I've never, ever, been caught checking a young lady out as she's boarding the aircraft. (Her dad never looked straight at me, either. Doh!)