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Delat Tie 2

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Q: What's the difference between a Delta pilot's wife and a Lamborghini?


A: Not everybody has been in a Lamborghini.
 
Sure they CHOSE to stay...Riiiight. Heard that all the time from the jealous lifers at the sub contractor I worked for prior to nwa. Intercourse nightly??? Poor wives, having that fat underachieving slob home nightly. As a former nwa pilot I very rarely have asked for a windcheck. However, since it irratates you subs so much I think I will start asking at least twice per approach...Even on calm days. Night, night sub boy.


screamingpax said:
Isn't that funny, and now they act like they had nothing to do with them - ever. Not to mention, most of the senior guys at ASA CHOSE to stay so they could continue working only 6-8 days a month, having intercourse with their wives NIGHTLY and not take a pay cut to go sit in JFK on reserve with all the other chumps. I started this original thread with three of my favorite delta jokes and you guys have given me many more to use now. Kudos.....Keep up the good work. and....WINDCHECK! ha ha ha
Click to expand...
 
One time this Delta FA was sooo fat, when she jumped up in da air....

She got stuck!
 
No stars on this post yet???????
 
screamingpax said:
Isn't that funny, and now they act like they had nothing to do with them - ever. Not to mention, most of the senior guys at ASA CHOSE to stay so they could continue working only 6-8 days a month, having intercourse with their wives NIGHTLY and not take a pay cut to go sit in JFK on reserve with all the other chumps. I started this original thread with three of my favorite delta jokes and you guys have given me many more to use now. Kudos.....Keep up the good work. and....WINDCHECK! ha ha ha
Click to expand...


If I got out of Clownair after working at that flight school of an airline, I would act like I had nothing to do with them also! I would be ashamed to work at that airline! Even your active Comair pilots are ashamed of where they work, that is why you see them with "Delta Crew" tags on their bags!
 
WateryGrave said:
Aww, there is the bitter crybaby we knew and loved. We missed you, I thought you went soft on us. Thought maybe those Mainline benefits finally kicked in and paid for your personality transplant. Alas, it is the same old Acarpe who's wife left him for a Comair pilot and couldn't get a job waiting tables while he was furloughed. (hint.... it might have something to do with your personality).

Welcome home my friend, welcome home!
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Ah yes! A Comair puke that is so ashamed of where he works! How typical! Unlike the Comair pukes on furlough, I found a damn good job while I was out! Still doing it today in addition to Delta! Thank You! My wife needs someone capable of making a descent salary! You could not make her car payment! As far as personality, I would take a good look at yours pal! Maybe that is the reason you are forced to work in the minor leauges at the worst airline in America! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Loser!!! Get those apps filled out at MacD's!
 
Ezralite said:
Why did the other thread get closed? Lighten up, people!
Click to expand...

It was closed due to overwhelming multiple complaints. Jokes are fine but not at the expense of others. Think before you post.
 
SLUF4 said:
your jokes aren't really jokes
Click to expand...

Exactly.

It's funny that this guy gets all upset about a few jokes and turns it into a Comair vs. Delta thread, and assumes that everybody works for Comair. The more he gets upset the more fun we all have.
 
This thread is like a good healthy-hershey bar and two cups of starbucks purge.

We all need one every now and then to remind us just how full of crap we really are.
 
I'm still trying to figure out what a "Delat Tie 2" is.
 
Whats the difference between a Delta pilot and any other pilot in the world?

Any other pilot in the world does not turn off at the end of a 9000ft runway; they use the high speeds!

Whats the difference between NW DC9 pilots and any other pilot in the world? Any other pilot in the world doesn't yell at me when I am jumpseating for 'stealing his flying' and 'ruining the industry' when his airline pilots voted to give up scope...when I was 15 years old
 
Whats the difference between a Delta pilot and any other pilot in the world?

Any other pilot in the world does not turn off at the end of a 9000ft runway; they use the high speeds!

Whats the difference between NW DC9 pilots and any other pilot in the world? Any other pilot in the world doesn't yell at me when I am jumpseating for 'stealing his flying' and 'ruining the industry' when his airline pilots voted to give up scope...when I was 15 years old
 
Cobraair75drvr said:
Sure they CHOSE to stay...Riiiight. Heard that all the time from the jealous lifers at the sub contractor I worked for prior to nwa. Intercourse nightly??? Poor wives, having that fat underachieving slob home nightly. As a former nwa pilot I very rarely have asked for a windcheck. However, since it irratates you subs so much I think I will start asking at least twice per approach...Even on calm days. Night, night sub boy.
Click to expand...

Actually, I have no interest in flying for Delta or any other major. I have my house nearly paid off and a sugar momma at home as well. Why would I want to ruin it with reserve and Delta's crappy bases (JFK, ATL, CVG). CONTRARY to popular belief, not everyone wants to be a Delta pilot. I am home almost every night of the month. Not to mention, leave to go to a major, then get furloughed like all of the rest of you. Funny I have met many people at NW and Delta that have been furloughed longer then they have been on active pilot status. No thanks. And it doesn't irritate me at all that you all ask for wind checks. Please do, lord knows we don't want an accident. I just think it is funny because most of these crappy regional pilots don't need to ask for it and they land just fine. Question, what do you guys do if the wind shifts? Oh my god... Why can't Delta pilots just fly the airplane? For being the "best pilots in the world" they sure aren't any more impressive than any other pilot. Sure you can land a 757 on autoland, but can you land a cub on a glacier with a crosswind, or land a helicopter on a pinnacle approach. Point is, flying an airliner doesn't require much skill compared to other aspects of aviation like bush flying. And either way, who cares? Is that how you justify yourself to your wife so she will sleep with you? Sucks to be you then... Get over yourselves.. You are ordinary civilians like everyone else, you just are unhappy with the way your life turned out and want to take it out on others, hence, surfing regional forums try and bring them down. Boo hoo.....
 
And by the way people!!!!!!!!......My dog is better than everyone else's dog!!!
 
onewithwings said:
It was closed due to overwhelming multiple complaints. Jokes are fine but not at the expense of others. Think before you post.
Click to expand...

A joke at the expense of others is perfectly fine. The only time a joke isn't fine is when it's not funny.
 
flyboyike said:
A joke at the expense of others is perfectly fine. The only time a joke isn't fine is when it's not funny.
Click to expand...

Completely agree. What is a joke if it isn't at the expense of somebody? Aw, did we hurt someones feelings? And by the way, we did think, about some new and better jokes.
 
While in the cockpit, two male delta pilots fart at the same time.

Each looks at the other and says "Ooops. I'm not allowed to tell that joke."
 
buscap said:
While in the cockpit, two male delta pilots fart at the same time.

Each looks at the other and says "Ooops. I'm not allowed to tell that joke."
Click to expand...


TYhat one makes no sense.

That one is stupid.

That one is not funny at all! You can do better than that.


Heard some good news today! Comair pilots are going to get 3 months pay when they are all fired. What does that equal, around $3600? You all are not worth it. Wind check please. "Tower this is Comair, I need a progressive to the right runway please."
 
Carpie, while you are getting that wind check, could you get a little spell check too?!
 
What's the difference between a Comair pilot and a Delta pilot?
The Comair pilot doesn't beat his wife to within an inch of her life and rape her in front of his children. You might consider that, carpie.
 
I have no real beef with DL pilots as I hitch rides on them a lot and they have always been accomadating... However I must say the windcheck thing is kind of silly. I never cared until this one day a few months ago, last leg of a trip, landed on 28, and were holding short of 27L. After waiting for an obscene amount of time for a break in arrivals so we could cross, they finally said our callsign in preparation to clear us to cross. MID-sentence, tower gets cutoff with "windcheck" from some DL aircraft on approach. Since the transmission was blocked, said DL guy jumps back on quickly and says it again. In the time it took for the DL guy to repeat himself after jumbling up the frequency and the tower to read back the wind for this clown, he was too close and we had to wait another 5 minutes to cross.

Don't you guys have a wind barb or does the airplane not crab or something?
 
Last edited:
doh said:
What's the difference between a Comair pilot and a Delta pilot?
The Comair pilot doesn't beat his wife to within an inch of her life and rape her in front of his children. You might consider that, carpie.
Click to expand...


How can you spot a Comair pilot?

He is the one getting ready to takeoff on a 2000 foot runway!

Have you guys started your unemployment benefits yet?
 
Abernathy said:
I have no real beef with DL pilots as I hitch rides on them a lot and they have always been accomadating... However I must say the windcheck thing is kind of silly. I never cared until this one day a few months ago, last leg of a trip, landed on 28, and were holding short of 27L. After waiting for an obscene amount of time for a break in arrivals so we could cross, they finally said our callsign in preparation to clear us to cross. MID-sentence, tower gets cutoff with "windcheck" from some DL aircraft on approach. Since the transmission was blocked, said DL guy jumps back on quickly and says it again. In the time it took for the DL guy to repeat himself after jumbling up the frequency and the tower to read back the wind for this clown, he was too close and we had to wait another 5 minutes to cross.

Don't you guys have a wind barb or does the airplane not crab or something?
Click to expand...


Don't you guys have a compass on your aircraft?
 

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