"Great" cockpit talk..

[Razorback one]

"Watch your sack, I'm coming back."

 

[RCA]

Three things every FO needs to know:

Your right
Clear right
I'll take the fat one.

 

[flylowman]

left knee
Right Knee
Weenee

This Job Sucks!!!

I hate scheduling.

I hate management
ect. ect.

 

[Bluestreak]

"I think that was for us.."
"What trip are we this leg ?"
"Would you mind making a food run ?"
"Do you have the times from the last 3 days ?"
"This guy doesn't have any wands and he's not wearin' the vest..."
"Knees,nutz and knockers"
"You've reached the cockpit.All pilots are currently busy.Please call again later.."
"Ask him to spell that intersection.."
"You see it out your side ?"
"What gate are we going to ?"
"Let's go to the north hold line and call Jimmy.."
"Thanks for the light show (fill in the blank).."
"blocked"
"Did you get a good line next month ?..."

I was actually asked this by another Captain who just jumpseated to work with us while we were walking to the crashpad:"Do you have any extra shirts ? I forgot to pack some." WTF ?

 

[buxflyr]

After hearing several female ATC controllers in a row.. "hmm...lotta empty kitchens tonight"!

 

[svcta]

The last thing you'll hear on my CVR tape:

"DID YOU SEE THE SIZE OF THE TENTACLES ON THAT THING!?"

 

[SBD]

"I think that was for us.."
"Ask him to spell that intersection.."

Two of the best right there.

"Call us out ten early."
"Call us in after you do you walk around."

 

[BIGGOAT]

Other pilot, "It will be the ILS to 26R, plate xxx, dated xxx, freq......we'll take the 2nd high speed and hold short the inboard. Any questions?"

Me "Uh, did you say something?"

Goat

 

[Gnarloooo]

"Make it happen, co-Cap'n"

 

[pilotpat]

At the end of my Aspen Lindz Departure brief, "Any questions"

Huh?

or

Do you think my Ipod could somehow fit in the headphone jack?

 

[DrewBlows]

After most of my landings...


"...ahhhh FUDGE!" (but I don't say fudge)

 

[Coool Hand Luke]

"Release the hounds!" When turning off the seat belt sign.

 

[nwa_contrails]

"We need that to live." (Simpson's throwback.)

Heheh, i remember that one....we need someone to fly to the windy city!!! It's gonna be windy!

 

[xjgearbtch]

Throw it in deep reverse... "eat seats you b#tches"

 

[bizzum]

After greasing it on....look to my left and say "you mind callin the tower to find out if we are on the ground?" ......then the ground spoilers come up....

 

[fatdumbandhappy]

"a.g.m."

 

[pilotpat]

Gear up...rings off

and my personal favorite ~

You gonna eat that???

 

[Occam's Razor]

"No reading until your revisions are done!"

"Take that, Detroit!" (firm touchdown comment)

"Nice impact, Mr. Richter! That'll have FEMA out here by Thursday!" (another hard landing comment)

"Nice job, Maverick! You don't need to leave room for your wingman on the left side...so next time, land it on centerline."

"Two-hopper to Jeter...who fire's to first!" (comment after a bounced landing)

"Pull my finger!"

 

[OPECJet]

This airplane, that runway, any questions?

Outta here, back into here, any questions?

This thing's a piece of s___.....

 

[DannyNoonan]

You done with that usa today??

(sudoku)