Ten Signs It's Time to Retire From the Fracs

[Dooker]

• You spend more time preflighting the automatic defibrillator than you do the jet

• You start every conversation with, “Back when I was with Braniff …

• Your favorite magazine is AARP

• You’ve outlived all three of your exes

• Your carry pictures of your great-grandchildren in your wallet

• You’d still do Bea Arthur, in a second

• Instead of tipping the line guys, you hand out Werther’s Originals

• Thick tufts of ear hair make it hard to hear ATC

• Uniform pants too snug for Depends

• Because it’s time you found something else to fill up the sorry aching void that is your life and let someone else have a shot, you greedy old selfish bastard

 

[NachoMamma]

Lmao

• Instead of tipping the line guys, you hand out Werther’s Originals

Holy crap! Very funny.

 

[Just Peachy]

You're going to fit right in with current government group......

 

[Dooker]

You're going to fit right in with current government group......

I have no idea what that's supposed to mean, but I'll assume it's a compliment.

Thanks!

 

[fob727]

Grow up

:crying: Dooker, you're kinda spoiled, huh?

 

[fischman]

Lighten up man. It was a joke... and a funny one. If you didn't get it, maybe dooker needs to add a #11 to the list.

 

[Dooker]

Lighten up man. It was a joke... if you didn't get it, maybe dooker needs to add a #11 to the list.

Took the words right out of my mouth, fisch.

BTW, that Bush quote's hilarious.

 

[fob727]

Ok, I'll bite. What's #11?

 

[J3guy]

Nice one Dooker, HILARIOUS!!

 

[Amish RakeFight]

Lmao!

 

[FR8DOG777]

#11 is when your ceo cuts your 401k matching reducing your pay from 45% less than the competitors to 48% just so they can afford to pay F&H.

 

[ozpilot]

#12 When you go to bed at home, you hang out a Due Not Disturb sign.

#13 When you eat a meal at home, you insist that it be served cold and you eat it in your lap.

#14 When your wife drops you off at the airport you tip her $3 ($5 if she gets your bag)

 

[400pilot]

#15 When your kids knock on your bedroom door before 8am, you instinctively start yelling at them to read the do not disturb sign...and then follow up with a cell phone call to your wife in the other room to file a complaint.

#16 When you routinely use your blackberry while at home to email flightaware or Jetplan for current local wx conditions.

#17 When you understand fully why someone would rather land in the Hudson, than go back to TEB one more time...

 

[clickclickboom]

#18 You put locks on all your doors at home with the same combination as the stock lockers...

 

[x402]

I have no idea what that's supposed to mean, but I'll assume it's a compliment.

Thanks!

No it wasn't.......and that's really funny.

 

[fob727]

what I find humorous

Fishman, while I generally find your posts insightful, I don't see the humor in Dooker's post.

What I find some humor in is the thought of, while laughing hysterically, explaining to an f/o like Dooker, how MX is going to have pry my cold dead hands from the thrust levers and tiller, before I voluntarily give up my seat to a whiny slug like him.

 

[Mike Jenvey]

#19 You always have to ask the FO to get the ATIS as there is too much feedback on your hearing aid.

#20 You advise TSA that you are exempt from the body screening arch, as it might cause problems with your pacemaker.

Keep 'em coming!!

 

[Willy21]

You use security tape on your doors at home and in your car.

 

[CA1900]

You wear the same ugly polo shirt and same pair of jeans every night for your entire week at home...

 

[GooseHZ]

....

You havent bought soap, shammpoo, lotion in years for your own bathroom at home.