What's the dumbest question you've been asked as a pilot?

[viper548]

are you a security guard? (asked by a guy on his way to interview to be a security guard)

 

[viper548]

Are you aware that the allen wrench in your bag (taped to the spare wheel) is a prohibited item? (asked by ABQ tsa agent)

 

[JediNein]

"Isn't this a prohibited item?" - BUR TSA agent holding up my headset
"Why do you have an aviation radio?" - Same BUR TSA agent
"Are you aware that navigation charts are not allowed in carry-on luggage?" - BUR TSA agent's supervisor.

I missed three possible flights waiting for the BUR TSA incompetence squad to find someone literate enough to read their own policy and regulation documents.

 

[Fly_Chick]

"That's your car? I thought pilots made a lot of money?"

avl_pilot, you owe me a drink for spitting mine out. Classic!

 

[SlapShot]

When are you going to fly for a real airline?

 

[LAXSaabdude]

"Who do you fly for?"

"American Eagle. We fly the shorter-haul segments for American Airlines."

"Oh, you must know my friend Bill, then. He flies for American. I think he flies a 747 to Amsterdam. He's based in Atlanta. Do you know him?"

LAXSaabdude.

 

[Nindiri]

"Why didn't you do a mag check? Isn't that an FAA violation?"

 

[avl_pilot]

I was having a conversation with another instructor who is trying to get into the airlines and he asks, "what airline did you apply to?". I told him Piedmont. He looks at me a little confused and says, "I thought they stopped flying a while back?"

 

[NewBlue]

Will this thing fly? (looking at the mighty SD3-30)

 

[BLing]

Not everybody is 100% aware of this industry. Yes people ask a lot of stupid questions. However, keep in mind that outsiders arent experts on the industry and dont know all of the wonderful truths found on flightinfo.com.

 

[FL000]

Not everybody is 100% aware of this industry. Yes people ask a lot of stupid questions. However, keep in mind that outsiders arent experts on the industry and dont know all of the wonderful truths found on flightinfo.com.

Thanks for the wet blanket. You don't have to be an expert to avoid asking some of the idiotic questions we hear every day. Besides, we're just having a little fun at others' expense. Isn't that what it's all about?

 

[BLing]

Thanks for the wet blanket. You don't have to be an expert to avoid asking some of the idiotic questions we hear every day. Besides, we're just having a little fun at others' expense. Isn't that what it's all about?

I was just being a smarta**. "Isn't that whats its all about?"

 

[BankAccount=0$]

Q: Is this thing gonna make it to Toledo??

A: Ummm....well it's been making it there for the last 3 years, but if ya want you can ask the captain just to make sure.......

Gotta love the Mighty Beech, standing at the bottom of the stairs is like an engraved invitation for people to ask stupid questions.

 

[jetexas]

Two little boys about 4 - 6 years old just stood and stared up at me in the food court. Finally one says "You're a policeman!!" I said "No, I'm a pilot". He then said "Oh, I don't know what that is!

 

[JATAGA]

What do you do at the airline?

...First Officer

So do ya wanna be a pilot one day?

 

[whaleroast]

If you want to see stupid people at work, try flying out of Vegas on a late Sunday evening.
Jumpseating on Southwest and sitting in the back, one of the last to board, standing in line in the jetway, the guy in front of me turns around and asks me if I'm a pilot. Yeah, I guess the uniform gave it away. But, I tell him, him I'm just along for the ride, kind of like him, as a passenger so to speak. Then he says, "Man, I am so hammered." Great. Guess who I end up sitting next to? As I'm taking the seat next to him he says as loud as he can: "Hey dude, shouldn't you be in the cockpit? Who's going to fly this thing?"

 

[T-Storm Chaser]

What do you do at the airline?

...First Officer

So do ya wanna be a pilot one day?

I had one like that too


Idoit: So what do you do for a living?

Me: I fly freight

Idiot: Huh?

Me: I am a cargo pilot

Idiot: So one day do you want to be a real pilot?

I just laughed at the dude and returned to hitting on his girlfriend. I ended up dating her a couple weeks later.

 

[Mr Wu]

During IOE on the 1900, we had a flight with only 3 pax. Two were obviously seasoned fliers as they asked me where they should sit as we were so light. I brainfarted and said "anywhere in the last 3 seats" instead of the last 3 rows. I get on the airplane and all 3 are crammed into row 9.

 

[4fanman]

While deadheading on NWA I could just tell he wanted to talk to me. You know, you can see out of the corner of your eye that he's looking at you and is about to say something. Something stupid. So you feign sleep. Close the eyes, act tired and irritable. Pretend he isn't there. Nobody would bother someone who is obvioulsy tired and trying to get some sleep.

"So, ya checkriding home?"

Open one eye, turn head and give him that look, turn head back and close eye. Then, I sat there wishing that all of my checkrides were this easy.

Pilots aren't the only ones who have to suffer this. My dad spent 30 years as a cop and I think they get more stupid questions than pilots do.

 

[viper548]

While waiting to get on the plane after I checked the fuel panel:
Q. What do the 3 stripes mean?
A. I'm a first officer

Q. Does the Captain ever let you fly the plane?
A. Usually every other flight

Q. Then what does the Captain do when you're flying?
A. Supervise

Q. Why does the FA wear 2 stripes?
A. I don't know

Q. Who has one stripe?
A. Sorry, I've gotta get outside and check something.