I like you....
Look, anyone that goes for the 2 year upgrade is STUPID!! You'll upgrade on your 2nd year and die your 3rd. That's why it's SO JUNIOR!!! But whatever, go for it so I can move up.
10 years to break even? I think you just stuck one thumb up your arse and used the other thumb to test which direction the wind was going and said...."yep, sounds like 10 years". What kind of bs statement is that?
You know what, Stuart.... I like you! You're not like the other people, here-in the trailer park....
Oh no, no-don't get me wrong, Stuart....they're fine people, they're good Americans.... But they're content sit back, maybe watch a little Mork and Mindy on channel 57.. Maybe kick back a cool Coors 16-ouncer.. They're good, fine people, Stuart...but they don't know what the queers are doing to the soil!
You know that Johnny Werzner kid-the kid who delivers papers in the neighborhood? He's a fine kid... Some of the neighbors say he smokes crack, but I don't believe that.... Anyway, for his 10th birthday all he wanted was a burrow owl, just like his old man..... "Dad, get me a burrow owl, and I'll never ask for anything else as long as I live!" So the guy breaks down and buys the kid a burrow owl... Anyway, 10:30 the other night I go out into my yard and there's the Werzner kid looking up into a tree..... I say "What are you looking for?" He said, "I'm looking for my burrow owl." I say "Jumping Jesus on a pogo stick!! Everybody knows that a burrow owl lives in a hole in the ground!! Why the hell do you think they call it a burrow owl, anyway!?" Now, Stuart, do you think a kid like that is going to know what the queers are doing to the soil?
I first became aware of all this about 10 years ago, the summer my oldest boy, Bill Jr. died. You know that carnival that comes to town every year? Well-this year it came with a ride they called "the Mixer." The man said "Keep your head and arms inside "the Mixer" at all times." But Bill Jr., he was a daredevil! Just like his old man!! He was leaning out and yelling "Hey everybody! Look at me, look at me!" POW! He was decapitated!!! They found his head over by the snowcone concession..... A few days after that, I open up the mail and there is this phamphlet in there from Pueblo, Colodaro-it's addressed to Bill Jr. and it's entitled "Do you know what the queers are doing to the soil?"
Now, Stuart, if you look at the soil around any large U.S. City with a big underground homosexual population-Des Moines, Iowa-perfect example.... Just look at the soil around Des Moines, Stuart.... You can't build on it, you can't grow anything in it! The government says its due to poor farming.... But I know what's really going on, Stuart..... It's the queers! They're in it with the aliens! They're building landing strips for gay Martians!! I swear to God!!!
You know what Stuart, I like you.... You're not like the other people-here... in the trailer park......