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Simple guide to Flight Attendant satisfaction!!!

SFR

Pilot Guy
Joined
Nov 25, 2001
Posts
720
Total Time
6000
Here is what I do:


I buy those bags of Ghirardelli dark chocolates and hand them out during the crew briefing.

The gals/guys love it and you get anything you want! I am the kind of guy that does not hold my pee and have jumped out to hit the lav within 45 mitutes of takeoff. They never gripe about it when you set the mood nicely to begin with.

Just another example of "don't work for the system, make the system work for you"


It is easy to get what you want when people are predictable.
 

~~~^~~~

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 21, 2001
Posts
6,137
Total Time
7,500+
I've found the chocolates have lost their effectiveness as bribes since we got the twix (or whatever they are) bars.
 

onewithwings

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 3, 2006
Posts
776
Total Time
14 yrs
I always say you need to have respect to get respect....two way street.
 

tomgoodman

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 13, 2006
Posts
2,356
Total Time
20,000
Designer bribes

I've found the chocolates have lost their effectiveness as bribes since we got the twix (or whatever they are) bars.

Might have to upgrade to Godiva. It's not the chocolate, it's the label. :p
 

jetflier

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Posts
718
Total Time
lot's
At Northwest all you had to do was throw a couple of twinkies up on the glareshield, then stand back, keep your hands close to your side, and open the cockpit door.
 

jhill

Senior Menber
Joined
May 13, 2003
Posts
247
Total Time
17,000
here is what i do:


I buy those bags of ghirardelli dark chocolates and hand them out during the crew briefing.

The gals/guys love it and you get anything you want! I am the kind of guy that does not hold my pee and have jumped out to hit the lav within 45 mitutes of takeoff. They never gripe about it when you set the mood nicely to begin with.

Just another example of "don't work for the system, make the system work for you"




it is easy to get what you want when people are predictable.

wgas?
 

vtwo

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 18, 2005
Posts
329
Total Time
+11K
how bout this

CAPT:--"DING"
FA:-----Yes captain
CAPT:---I will be coming out in1 minute for the bathroom have it ready, thanks

I minute later

CAPT:---"DING"
FA:------yes Captain?
CAPT:---I will be coming out now thanks.

end of subject.
WTF why is this even an issue? Get a grip and start acting like the CAPTAIN.
Who is in charge of this Airplane??????
 

Max Powers

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 26, 2005
Posts
1,136
Total Time
9000+
CAPT:--"DING"
FA:-----Yes captain
CAPT:---I will be coming out in1 minute for the bathroom have it ready, thanks

I minute later

CAPT:---"DING"
FA:------yes Captain?
CAPT:---I will be coming out now thanks.

end of subject.
WTF why is this even an issue? Get a grip and start acting like the CAPTAIN.
Who is in charge of this Airplane??????

Not only does this guy smell of Awesome CRM, but I'm guessing his wife loves him too. HAHAH
 

vtwo

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 18, 2005
Posts
329
Total Time
+11K
CRM sounds like it has gone out the door when you have to bribe some one to do their job.

Crm Encompasses the Crew, However when the Captain feels like he has to bow to the Flight attendants , the concept of who is in charge of the Vessel is gone.
I have no problem with CRM or My wife.
Respect is a 2 way street however Rank is not. If they don't respect you when you are leaving the cockpit then what makes you think they will listen in an emergency, Afterall they know better, right?

I have been known to bring candy, buy drinks and pay for the van tips for the crews not to mention I get some compliments once in a while for helping out with crew & passenger issues. But hey that is my job, so I do it the best I can.
 

SFR

Pilot Guy
Joined
Nov 25, 2001
Posts
720
Total Time
6000
That is true. I never ask if I can use the restroom. I always call back and say that we need a lav break and to call me when it is ready. Never more than a minute or two.
 

SFR

Pilot Guy
Joined
Nov 25, 2001
Posts
720
Total Time
6000
Oh, not to mention, a large meat stick helps with FA satisfaction also.
 

Crash Pad

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 10, 2005
Posts
1,720
Total Time
40,000
See I'm a little different. First I walk on the aircraft and ignore the FA's completely while I stow my stuff.

Then in an after thought just as the passengers are coming down I give them a quick briefing... I make sure to screw up there names and on occasion just use the classic "where did what's her tits go?"

Then just before I retreat to the front for the rest of the flight I go to the most forward lav. and take a massive growler. I don't flush and just leave it there to marinade during boarding.

Stay thirsty my friends.
 

vtwo

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 18, 2005
Posts
329
Total Time
+11K
See I'm a little different. First I walk on the aircraft and ignore the FA's completely while I stow my stuff.

Then in an after thought just as the passengers are coming down I give them a quick briefing... I make sure to screw up there names and on occasion just use the classic "where did what's her tits go?"

Then just before I retreat to the front for the rest of the flight I go to the most forward lav. and take a massive growler. I don't flush and just leave it there to marinade during boarding.

Stay thirsty my friends.

THAT'S GREAT just blew beer out of nose on that one.
I like the front lav Growler Marinate thing. Oh don't for get to rummage through the galley after they have set it up. Grab what ever your going to need for the flight.
They love that too.
 

Amish RakeFight

Registered Loser
Joined
Dec 28, 2005
Posts
8,006
Total Time
.
With looks (and personality) like mine, it's not unusual for an FA ('s) to surpise me with a nice box of quality chocolates along with coy giggles, bedroom eyes and a million dollar smile. Since I've a really sweet, hot GF at home, I often need to decline these gracious gifts so as to preclude any jealousy. Does this happen to you often as well?
 

PBRstreetgang

Registered Abuser
Joined
Mar 4, 2002
Posts
3,241
Total Time
Total
I find a nice selection of vibrators works wonders, 220V and heavy cable power corded for the most grizzled NW veteran down to the mini finger job for the SKYW virgins.
PBR
 

~~~^~~~

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 21, 2001
Posts
6,137
Total Time
7,500+
Might have to upgrade to Godiva. It's not the chocolate, it's the label. :p
Tom, nah really, you can offer them Godiva, but they have one or two of the Twix bars in their mouth while they are tearing the wrapper off the next one. I did offer Godiva. It is like offering a guy a Sweetwater 420 while he's swimming in the brightener tank at the Budwiser Brewery.

Besides, "Godiva - melts in your flight bag, not in your mouth."

What works best when they ignore you is to make a cabin announcement and close with "we'll be arriving at our destination at ellevenenofiverplast." You can hear the cacophony of FA chimes the minute you hang up. When they call the flight deck (annoyed) to say passengers are asking about the arrival time, I go ahead and hit them with my dream list of food and beverages.

I now offer gum and breath fresheners. They seem to like those to chase half melted twix bars. Worst case, you can survive for a day on gum and breath fresheners, I have.
 
Last edited:

Paul R. Smith

Fender Bender
Joined
Jan 15, 2004
Posts
722
Total Time
4:30
CAPT:--"DING"
FA:-----Yes captain
CAPT:---I will be coming out in1 minute for the bathroom have it ready, thanks

I minute later

CAPT:---"DING"
FA:------yes Captain?
CAPT:---I will be coming out now thanks.

end of subject.
WTF why is this even an issue? Get a grip and start acting like the CAPTAIN.
Who is in charge of this Airplane??????

+1
Nothing bossy about that.
 

dtfl

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 9, 2004
Posts
676
Total Time
4000+
Here is what I do:


I buy those bags of Ghirardelli dark chocolates and hand them out during the crew briefing.

The gals/guys love it and you get anything you want! I am the kind of guy that does not hold my pee and have jumped out to hit the lav within 45 mitutes of takeoff. They never gripe about it when you set the mood nicely to begin with.

Just another example of "don't work for the system, make the system work for you"


It is easy to get what you want when people are predictable.

STOP THAT!!! Now the former connection carrier FAs will be fat by the time they get to mainline! :)
 
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