Overheard on ATC

[gordon24]

Kind of tastless, but here it goes.

Going into MCO in a citation.

Tower: Citation123 170 to 5 mile final, southwest behind you 30 kts faster

Tower: Southwest, start slowing, you've got a citation ahead and you're 30 kts faster.

Southwest: roger, we're slowing.

Tower: Citation 123, can you pick it up to 190, Southwest is still gaining.

Tower: Southwest, start slowing sir, citation traffic ahead.

My partner says, "Yea southwest, you guys trying to buy another gas station?"

Dead silence for the next 30 secs.

 

[ATTCS]

In the 70's I was buzzing along in a 172 through southern Missouri on flight following from KC ARTCC. Someone in a Lear checked on freq and it was obvious he didn't listen, just started talking, blocking out another transmission. He definitely had an attitude about it. The gal working Center then told him "That's all right, I was a student pilot once myself".

 

[SiuDude]

Heard today on the Atlanta center Macey sector frequency.

Aircraft: Center, Delta 117 would like to request runway 8L.
Center: Which runway is that, I don't get to see the airport very often.
Aircraft: That's the long strip of concrete next to Delta headquarers (but that's not important right now).
Center: Roger, I'll pass on that request to approach.

 

[pilot772]

Said to me by the guy who works both CLT and PHL ramps. The guy does a great job working the ramp, but he said a mouthfull to us a couple of months ago.

"Piedmont, hold your push. You got an RJ comin' on your tail".

Jimmy he's by far the best ramp controller I've ever seen

 

[Jrparne]

Heard a pilot flying an rj into toledo express say with a strong southren accent:

HOLY TOLEDO COMAIR 1422 with you level 9

 

[OPECJet]

So sad when my soul mission out of this career is to have someone post something on the internet that I said on the radio. Hasn't happened yet, but it will.......

 

[gator_hater]

Reported from a Delta Capt.

Delta 767: "Ground, OK to cross bleed? Don't wan't to blast the guy behind us."
Comair: "Tell Delta to go ahead and blow me."

 

[John Pennekamp]

Reported from a Delta Capt.

Delta 767: "Ground, OK to cross bleed? Don't wan't to blast the guy behind us."
Comair: "Tell Delta to go ahead and blow me."

Now that's funny, I don't care who you are...

I was blasted by a Comair -700 once, and pretended to key the mike, but keyed the intercom. I said "Thanks for the blow job, Comair, that's the second time you f---ed us". My FO thought I transmitted and almost died.

 

[Drill Sgt. Dad]

I said this one back in my frieght dogs days of the early 90's. I was told to follow an Eagle Shorts 360 and a CCAIR Shorts 360. It was as follows:

CLT GND: Seneca 8793E (Now in RAM Air's Fleet), taxi to Rwy 18L, you will be following an Eagles Shorts and a US AIR shorts.

My Reply: I will follow a pair of Shorts to 18L , 8793E.

 

[groundpointsix]

Anyone know if the "g'daaaaayyyyy" guy is still in RDU? That always made me smile.

If this is the guy who speaks in monotone, he still is there.

 

[The Drizzle]

for my money, nothing beats Franklin in LGA

 

[CitationLover]

auctioneer in CLT

anyways no one in CLE has gotten my spinal tap reference yet. i always start off with a:

"hello cleveland" in my fake british accent

 

[The Drizzle]

i'm pretty sure they get it, and i'm sure they are sick of it.

 

[BankAccount=0$]

auctioneer in CLT

anyways no one in CLE has gotten my spinal tap reference yet. i always start off with a:

"hello cleveland" in my fake british accent

Let's try not to confuse CLE controllers with any un-necessary humor, they have a hard enough time simply trying to sequence traffic in the first place.

 

[CF34-3B1]

Heard this one from an old ATC'er who swears it happened. If you spent any time around DAB you'll appreciate it.

N118AT: (In your best mid east accent) Daytona Approaching Controll, I am Vun Vun Eet Alpva Tango for landing instructions"

DAB App: 118AT say your position.

N118AT: Yes yes, for landing please.

DAB App: Sir, what is your position from Daytona?

N118AT: Dirka Dirka Mohammed Jihad (or something like that)

After a few more unsuccessful attempts:

DAB App: N118AT, are you over DeLand? (a GA field just outside the DAB class C)

N118AT: No, I am over dee water...................