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Divorce

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capt. megadeth said:
That's the true sign of an unmotivated and ambitionless individual. I don't care for people like that, sorry.
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Maybe I read you wrong, but I have to disagree. My wife is neither unmotivated nor ambitionless, we just think that with a job like mine that at least ONE parent needs to be there. Look at how kids are now with 2 working parents. ROTTEN!!!!
 
acaTerry said:
Maybe I read you wrong, but I have to disagree. My wife is neither unmotivated nor ambitionless, we just think that with a job like mine that at least ONE parent needs to be there. Look at how kids are now with 2 working parents. ROTTEN!!!!
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You read me wrong.
 
Glad you and your future X have worked it all out in a way you both consider fair. But yes, you are forgetting something.

Maybe you should ask the kids how fair they think it is to have the two people in whom they know they can have complete trust be the ones to destroy their world.
 
kommutrdog said:
Going through the same thing right now. We're keeping the jackals out of it. We didn't have any kids, so we are in a little better situation. Can't even imagine with kids.

Hang in there. Obviously, nobody knows the situation that led up to your split, but what is really helping me is being able to forge a new future, according to what I desire.

Yes, divorcing sucks and that whole 'tentative plan' that we all have in our heads for our future has been erased. I try to focus on an analogy:

One day, I'm sitting there with my wife's and my future laid out on a dry-erase board. I'm sitting there, reading and studying this plan and doing the best to hold up my end, doing what I think is right.

Then, all of the sudden. Things change. Something changes. It's as if a big eraser comes by and wipes clean my future...the dry erase board that once held our future is CLEAN. It's empty. Gone. A clean slate.

Then somebody (God ?) walks over to me and puts a marker in my hand and says: Here's a marker....that board is blank. Write your own future. It's up to you.

There world is yours !! Live strong.

PS I know I'm gonna catch a bunch of flack for posting this, but I don't give a f**k. Divorce sucks. No way around it.

I look at it this way. My "old" life has ended. Over. Gone. I have been given a great opportunity to shape my own future. I hope you can do the same. Be positive.
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Good Post!! Good Luck!!
 
capt. megadeth said:
That's the true sign of an unmotivated and ambitionless individual. I don't care for people like that, sorry.
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Heyas Mega,

I agree. I was in the enviable position of my wife making a fair bit more than my august personage. When she split, I thought long and hard about hitting HER up for alimony, just to see how far I could push the legal system.
But I blew it off because we had come to an equitable agreement for the split. We were only married for two years, so I chalked it up to a bad call on my part.

Then she tried to lawyer up to snake me for a bunch of assets when I had a ton of stuff that I should have been recovering from her...student loans, sold property that I had paid some notes on, etc.

When this, along with the pre-nup, was pointed out to her lawyer, they settled up mighty quick.

Over the course of two years, the whole marriage cost me about 60k, including wedding, ring, and a new car for her. She didn't get a dime from me at all in the divorce, and my legal fees/court costs were only $1500.


I urge anyone considering marrage to get a pre-nup. Considering the odds, it may be the best money you ever spend.

Nu
 
Axel said:
Glad you and your future X have worked it all out in a way you both consider fair. But yes, you are forgetting something.

Maybe you should ask the kids how fair they think it is to have the two people in whom they know they can have complete trust be the ones to destroy their world.
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Exactly. Couldn't have said it better.
 
CHQFA00 said:
Exactly. Couldn't have said it better.
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Interesting how the discussion died when that little detail came into the picture, isn't it?
 
When you get married, you pay, pay, and pay. When you get divorced, you pay, pay and pay. Then when you die and she is still living collecting $3500 a month, you will still be paying, because she will be collecting your retirement and or Social Security checks, provided she is still single--and why not if your earning over $70K a year to do nothing.

So long story short we guys are always getting f**** and don't relize it until it's too late.

Anyhow, hope you get your life back in order--and I know you will, but it will take time to get over it--if your normal and had feelings for her at one time or another. It took me 4 years to get over my cheatin wife.

Just remember, only the strong survive. GOOD LUCK!!
 
NuGuy said:
Heyas Mega,

I agree. I was in the enviable position of my wife making a fair bit more than my august personage. When she split, I thought long and hard about hitting HER up for alimony, just to see how far I could push the legal system.
But I blew it off because we had come to an equitable agreement for the split. We were only married for two years, so I chalked it up to a bad call on my part.

Then she tried to lawyer up to snake me for a bunch of assets when I had a ton of stuff that I should have been recovering from her...student loans, sold property that I had paid some notes on, etc.

When this, along with the pre-nup, was pointed out to her lawyer, they settled up mighty quick.

Over the course of two years, the whole marriage cost me about 60k, including wedding, ring, and a new car for her. She didn't get a dime from me at all in the divorce, and my legal fees/court costs were only $1500.


I urge anyone considering marrage to get a pre-nup. Considering the odds, it may be the best money you ever spend.

Nu
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I AGREE 100%
 
Axel said:
Interesting how the discussion died when that little detail came into the picture, isn't it?
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I couldn't agree with you more, but I can't force her to see it. I also couldn't get her to contribute in any way to the household, come home from the bar five nights a week, be faithful and stay disease free, attend counseling or handle any of her responsibilities.

After two agonizing years I can't take any more. I certainly don't feel cavalier about the split or, more importantly, the impact it will have on my children, but at this point it is the lesser of two evils. The only reason I posted here is to seek the advice of people who have gone through this before because I don't want to make any decisions that I will regret later and right now I am simply not 100%.
 
I love women.
 
jergar999 said:
I couldn't agree with you more, but I can't force her to see it. I also couldn't get her to contribute in any way to the household, come home from the bar five nights a week, be faithful and stay disease free, attend counseling or handle any of her responsibilities.

After two agonizing years I can't take any more. I certainly don't feel cavalier about the split or, more importantly, the impact it will have on my children, but at this point it is the lesser of two evils. The only reason I posted here is to seek the advice of people who have gone through this before because I don't want to make any decisions that I will regret later and right now I am simply not 100%.
Click to expand...


Rip it off like a band-aid, slower = more agony

With this situation, you only need to worry about the kids.

If she likes bars that much, a DNA test may be justified, she does'nt need to know.

Best of luck
 
Marriage is grand, divorce is $50,000.

I just finalized mine as well. It's a good thing she cheated, I have proof (photo and email evidence, signed affiidavit, etc ) AND she makes a lot more money than I can make as a pilot. Give me my truck and my clothes, joint custody (3 boys) and I'm on my way.

By the way, I lost 55 lbs, dropped from 35% to 10% body fat and started seeing a smokin' hot chick after the big "D". Bye Bye you cold hearted, egotistical, life-sucking b!thc!!!!!
 
flydaddy0499 said:
Marriage is grand, divorce is $50,000.

I just finalized mine as well. It's a good thing she cheated, I have proof (photo and email evidence, signed affiidavit, etc ) AND she makes a lot more money than I can make as a pilot. Give me my truck and my clothes, joint custody (3 boys) and I'm on my way.

By the way, I lost 55 lbs, dropped from 35% to 10% body fat and started seeing a smokin' hot chick after the big "D". Bye Bye you cold hearted, egotistical, life-sucking b!thc!!!!!
Click to expand...

Cheers !
 
I love hot women!
 
flydaddy0499 said:
Marriage is grand, divorce is $50,000.

I just finalized mine as well. It's a good thing she cheated, I have proof (photo and email evidence, signed affiidavit, etc ) AND she makes a lot more money than I can make as a pilot. Give me my truck and my clothes, joint custody (3 boys) and I'm on my way.

By the way, I lost 55 lbs, dropped from 35% to 10% body fat and started seeing a smokin' hot chick after the big "D". Bye Bye you cold hearted, egotistical, life-sucking b!thc!!!!!
Click to expand...

The weight loss thing is funny. I am down a total of 63 pounds since we first separated and I have started working out on a regular basis. It's really amazing how much better you feel after a good workout. While I'm not out seeing anyone I have noticed that I definitely get more attention from the opposite sex.
 
She wasn't a cheater when I married her, and she continues to outweigh me which she did for the duration of our marriage.
 
SOME of you men on here (and women, uhgmmm) are way off base. you want your cake and eat it too. I can't tell you HOW many times I fly with guys that boast their wife stays home, is a teacher or whatever disposable low income job. She is waiting on you hand and foot, you come home to a hot meal, pressed shirts, etc... Then blip, something goes WRONG in your marriage, she cheats on you, or WHATEVER then you want the big D with no obligations. You made a FINANCIAL CONTRACT when you signed up for this game, and it is a life long contract.

Everyone has their problems, so please become a little educated about relationships guys, why not try giving everything to your wife that you plan to give to that hot chick after your divorce...
 
these days it's pilots with low paying jobs...either one can have some deep rooted emotional issues. no money or laughs can change it. show me either spouse with some self esteem issue and i'll show you a failed marriage or one that can fail. self esteem issue are the ones most likely to be a feminine one. post partum depression, being unfulfilled, not happy even with the starbucks ,target, bonefish grill lifestyle; leads to a trainwreck

show me one dad who had drowned his kids in the tub. it was susan smith who strapped hers into a mazda and sent them into a lake. the wacko in texas who killed five in a tub. guys are stable. we self medicate with beer and we masturbate alot to make up for the psycho roller coaster that all women stay on.

even if you're successful, you heart's desire is to give suck to junior. why can't i breastfeed 24/7? why?
 
Update...

Its final!

A judge stamped the divorce a few days ago. Shared custody, we split time with the kids 50/50 and I provide the kids health insurance and give my ex $301 a month. The nightmare is almost over!
 
jergar999 said:
Its final!

A judge stamped the divorce a few days ago. Shared custody, we split time with the kids 50/50 and I provide the kids health insurance and give my ex $301 a month. The nightmare is almost over!
Click to expand...

$301 a month?!? What are you, a painter? OMG!
 

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