Two people in Aviation with Kids. Does it work?

[CHQFA00]

Husband is a pilot, I'm a FA. We just found out we're expecting. I'm sure there are thosands of people who have done this, but how do you make it work? We're thinking about moving to where the inlaws live (so we can have a babysitter), however, that will be a 2 leg offline commute for the both of us. It's either that, or I try to hire a nanny from the location where I'm at right now. Any advice? What have you done?

 

[capt. megadeth]

I'll let you know come June. I'm in the same boat as you are. My in laws live 5 minutes away so that takes some of the pressure off although we haven't officially asked them for help yet. If you want to chat, PM me, maybe we can exchange ideas. Good luck sista!

 

[bluefishbeagle]

Hope you are not both working for the same airline, all the eggs in one basket is not good.

However this dilemma proves one thing, aviation is an hereditary disease.

 

[satpak77]

it all comes down to

Who do I want to raise my kids? Me, or someone else (even if its the in-laws).

Period, end of story.

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

it all comes down to

Who do I want to raise my kids? Me, or someone else (even if its the in-laws).

Period, end of story.

So very true... in addition.. it is also... what is more important... social recognition in the work place and more money... or being the best parent you can.....

Gotta watch that second income... it can get sucked away real quick by child care costs, etc....

Children want to be with Mom and Dad. Period. You'll get weak excuses like... we both work, but our time with our kids is quality time.....

 

[taysha]

Quit your job and raise your child. A child needs a parent to be home and not raised in day care or by in laws.

 

[satpak77]

Husband is a pilot, I'm a FA. We just found out we're expecting. I'm sure there are thosands of people who have done this, but how do you make it work? We're thinking about moving to where the inlaws live (so we can have a babysitter), however, that will be a 2 leg offline commute for the both of us. It's either that, or I try to hire a nanny from the location where I'm at right now. Any advice? What have you done?

Some observations

Your FA income is not something to trade rearing your kid for. For that matter, not many jobs are either. We all recognize in "the real world" sometimes it is necessary to keep two jobs, but its not like you are a LASIK surgeon and considering "quitting" to rear your kid. You are an FA. It is what it is, no disrespect.

With that said, how MUCH will it COST you to move closer to the in-laws, with the purpose that you keep your FA job?

You also stated you might hire a nanny. At what COST?

I argue flat out quitting your FA job, and not moving anywhere, AND raising your kid YOURSELF, is gonna be cheaper than keeping the job and moving, day care, nannys, etc etc.

Do the math.

 

[CHQFA00]

Here's my observation Satpak. Unlike YOUR job/airline, I can work one trip a month. I love how everyone on here is saying "Stay at home with your child, you need to raise it". Of course I need to raise it because I know that my husband will be gone 4 days a week, and that's really not raising a child, is it? I also ask you whether not your wife is happy being stuck at home day in and day out? I can give you a simple answer. No. BTW, do you even have children, or even married, or are you one of those Pilots that have a opinion about EVERYTHING and need to let everyone know?!?!

My point is, I'm not planning on doing a full time month with my airline. My plan was to work maybe one or two three day trips a month so I can get out of the house and still have my life while my husband is at home on his off days, and if not, find someone for a day or so a month to help me out.

And personally, I went on here to ask people that have been through this, you and most of the responders have not been through this. So if you reread my post, you will find that I'm asking people that are already in this sitution. If your not, WHY DON'T YOU get off the computer and go RAISE YOUR child instead of lecturing me?

 

[CHQFA00]

Nevermind, I give up, I knew I wouldn't find my answer here, what was I thinking? Someone who has actually been through this, please PM. Thanks.

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

so I can get out of the house and still have my life while my husband is at home on his off days, and if not, find someone for a day or so a month to help me out.

Have you tried a puppy first... to see if you really want to do this whole child thing?


I don't get it? What is so horrible about being at home with children?

If you need to "get out and still have a life" then maybe you aren't ready for the responsibilty of parenting. And maybe you won't appreciate the joys of raising children, they are not assets to acquire in the "keeping up with the Jonses" race of our materialistic society...

Sometimes a person has to choose... If a woman can find a man who wants to be Mr. Mom then go for it....

 

[FlyUnited]

I did it CHQ by dropping trips, exactly as you mentioned. Pay NO attention to the men on this board trying to tell you what is best for YOU and YOUR baby.

To answer your question, we had an au pair for years and most of them we still stay in touch with after many years. We tried all the other ways (nanny, housekeeper, family, daycare) but found this the best situation for us. Congratulations!

 

[CHQFA00]

Have you tried a puppy first... to see if you really want to do this whole child thing?


I don't get it? What is so horrible about being at home with children?

If you need to "get out and still have a life" then maybe you aren't ready for the responsibilty of parenting. And maybe you won't appreciate the joys of raising children, they are not assets to acquire in the "keeping up with the Jonses" race of our materialistic society...

Sometimes a person has to choose... If a woman can find a man who wants to be Mr. Mom then go for it....

You just don't get it do you? You obviously work corporate, are not married and no children and have not a clue about a "major" airline. This has nothing to do with money. I don't work for CHQ anymore, and either does my husband. It's the fact that I love my job. And since I'm given the "Freedom" of only flying once a month, than why should I quit once I have kids? I'm not abandoning my child to be a zealous working 30 days in a row flight attendant for money. It's simply that I love my job, want to keep my senority so by the time there older, I can go back.

Jesus.. go raise your own damn kids, and don't tell me how to raise mine.

 

[taysha]

CHKFA00....you asked us what we thought and everyone responded...so we are answering your question not lecturing.

I have been there. I just had a child 1 year ago and left my career as an airline pilot.

A child should be raised by their parents and not a day care center. If your husband is a pilot, then you dont need to work wheather it is PT or FT.

Why you are asking the public what to do is beyond me. As a responsible adult, you should know you need to stay home with the child. If you dont want to stay home, then you should have never considered having children.

For what purpose, would you go work 2 or 3 trips a month? Your ego..certainly not the money as a F/A...especially of you work for Chataqua.

It is time you grew up and put your child first.

 

[FlyUnited]

Taysha has no idea what you wrote directly above hers. If she chooses to completely give up her life and play the martyr is no reason that you should do the same.

CHQ, it's really fun once in awhile to meet up with the hubby on a layover and have a great little vacation "ALONE" with him. Enjoy! fyi - your kids will learn that they aren't the center of the universe and you'll get some much needed time away occasionally. Worked for me.

 

[cynic]

A good rule of thumb is... if you would not leave a person with the keys to your car, your house and your ATM card with pin number, then you sure as heck should not leave your child with them.

For me, the list of folks that could have my car, house, ATM card and pin include:

Mom
Dad
Older sister (not my younger one

ummmmm, yeah thats it.