Two people in Aviation with Kids. Does it work?

[capt. megadeth]

Rez, you're an idiot.

You can't love your kids and love your job? I guess you don't love your kids then because from what I understand, you are an active pilot. You need to quit your job today. C'mon, what's it gonna be macho man? The job or your kids.

Moron!

 

[CHQFA00]

Don't work corporate, happily married, two kids...

If you love your job, then love your job, but you can't love your job and love your kids at the same time...unless its bring your kid to work day...

The time they are older? What in 20 years? Just because teenagers can wipe and make thier own meals doesn't mean for you to go off on a trip. Teenagers need thier parents more than ever. I recent study showed that teens want to be with thier parents. Not on Xbox, not at the mall and not doing X at some rave party.

You don't get it.......

Than what your saying is that you hate your kids????? Go back to your "fixing ALPA", I'm sure your KIDS just LOVE you.

 

[CHQFA00]

Thanks for the positive (and real, been in the situation) feedback Megadeath, United and the ones that have PM me. What I find so interesting is some of the people that get on here that have the "Do as I say, not as I do" attitude. This is 2007 not 1957.

And the ones that are telling me to stay home, I'm sure if I talked to your wife, she would tell me she hates you, is on the verge of hating the kids and is on the next step to the looney bin because she hasn't been out of the house and wish she could leave you and your "I love me and can do no wrong attitude" on the side of the curb.

 

[Black Hawk]

Is life on the road with an airline really worth giving up raising your child for?

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

. Then, after years of nothing but kids kids kids and having no skills whatsoever, .

Some people live thier lives so this isn't an issue. Its like trying to justify flying into a T-storm. Well how about you don't do it...

Now that isn't to say that it would never happen. But you people that try and max out your lives with two jobs, kids, etc.... seem to be pushing the envolope. You already set yourself up with statements like, "I need to get out and have a life, get a break from the kids..."

Many parents don't need a break from thier kids. They want to be around them everyday. Sure they get annoyed and fustrated, but they don't need an escape for four days a couple times a month...

And that is the point... if you aren;t prepared to be with your kids for 24/7 then maybe you shouldn't have them.... if you need an escape from the four walls and two kids then maybe you shouldn't

You want to look at me? and say I hate my kids cause I go on a four day trip? Tell me how to pay the house note with zero income and I'll listen...

With over 50% divorce rate and our kids on behavior modifying drugs we have a problem in our culture... we are neglecting our children...

Why do I care.. cause my child will sit next to yours in school while he's popping ritalin so he's won't be so pissed off cause you aren't around as much as you need to be.... all while he's dragging the whole class down with his behavior....

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

Thanks for the positive (and real, been in the situation) feedback Megadeath, United and the ones that have PM me. What I find so interesting is some of the people that get on here that have the "Do as I say, not as I do" attitude. This is 2007 not 1957.

The divorce rate was 50% and kids on behavior mod drugs in 1957? I am not saying we should go back to Rob and Laura...not at all.... but address the divorce rate and drugs...

And the ones that are telling me to stay home, I'm sure if I talked to your wife, she would tell me she hates you, is on the verge of hating the kids and is on the next step to the looney bin because she hasn't been out of the house and wish she could leave you and your "I love me and can do no wrong attitude" on the side of the curb.

Right... my wife must think like you and thus she hates me.... that is real deep....

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

.

You can't love your kids and love your job?!

You can love you kids as much as you want or say...but what they believe is another story... the fact is you have to be around to love them...for them to feel loved..to be loved... the more you are gone the less you can do that.. and yes that applies to me.. that is why I don't play musical parents with my kids... I am not willing for both parents to be working....

 

[capt. megadeth]

And the ones that are telling me to stay home, I'm sure if I talked to your wife, she would tell me she hates you, is on the verge of hating the kids and is on the next step to the looney bin because she hasn't been out of the house and wish she could leave you and your "I love me and can do no wrong attitude" on the side of the curb.

But she can't because she would be broke!

 

[capt. megadeth]

Now that isn't to say that it would never happen. But you people that try and max out your lives with two jobs, kids, etc.... seem to be pushing the envolope.

You want to look at me? and say I hate my kids cause I go on a four day trip? Tell me how to pay the house note with zero income and I'll listen...

First off, I don't try to max out my life dude. I have a mortgage and no other debt. We save $5000 a month. Can you say the same there Sparky? My kids will have a parent at home 95% of the time. It will be either their father or mother. The other 5%, they will be hanging out with grandma or grandpa. I would have loved that as a kid.

I agree with you in a lot of what you say. I have no intention on dumping my kid off on daycare or anything like that but you are extreme. I can love my kid and my job. If my kid's father is at home with them, what is wrong with that?

Secondly, YOU YOU YOU....that's right YOU said you cannot love your kids and love your job. If that is the case, then you must not love your kids. How to pay your house on zero income? I don't know...that's your problem but you are the one that said you cannot love your kids AND love your job so since you still need a job, maybe you should of not had kids. Make some sense Rez. You're making my head spin.

 

[capt. megadeth]

You can love you kids as much as you want or say...but what they believe is another story... the fact is you have to be around to love them...for them to feel loved..to be loved... the more you are gone the less you can do that.. and yes that applies to me.. that is why I don't play musical parents with my kids... I am not willing for both parents to be working....

That's great! If your wife feels that way, that's great but I don't have to do what you do. See my post above.

Also, my mom was a single mother and had to work. She was not around a lot. I remember her even going out sometimes on Saturday night with a date or friends. Was she a bad mother? Did I feel unloved? HELL NO! As a matter of fact, my mom is one of the best moms out there. I don't feel like I missed a thing. I know what you are saying to a point and I don't agree with a lot of what is going on with kids today but what you say is extreme. I agree if parents are never around, what's the point of having kids. This FA that started the thread said she would drop most trips and just work part time. There is nothing wrong with that. You act like if mom is not around 8 days out of the month, little Johnny is going to be messed up for the rest of his life which is ridiculous.

 

[taysha]

I am not playing a martyr. I planned on returning to work when my FMLA was over, but in the end I could not leave a new born at home. I chose to leave my job instead(captain).

There is no job worth leaving a child at home. CHQ will still get passes thru her husband and can meet him on a overnight anytime. This does not mean she needs to go fly a three dya trip in order to make $150 at flight attendant wages (after taxes).

She could make more at McDonalds and be home every night with her child.

 

[CHQFA00]

Quite frankly after reading your posts Taysha, I think the sky is safer now that your not flying. You make no sense what so ever and you assume everything. It's always a good idea to read all posts before posting.

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

That's great! If your wife feels that way, that's great but I don't have to do what you do. See my post above.

Also, my mom was a single mother and had to work. She was not around a lot. I remember her even going out sometimes on Saturday night with a date or friends. Was she a bad mother? Did I feel unloved? HELL NO! As a matter of fact, my mom is one of the best moms out there. I don't feel like I missed a thing. I know what you are saying to a point and I don't agree with a lot of what is going on with kids today but what you say is extreme. I agree if parents are never around, what's the point of having kids. This FA that started the thread said she would drop most trips and just work part time. There is nothing wrong with that. You act like if mom is not around 8 days out of the month, little Johnny is going to be messed up for the rest of his life which is ridiculous.

Your Mom was in a difficult bind and I'm sure she did a great job, despite your persona on the message boards...

But we are talking about two parents that have the choice... the luxury actually of working or staying at home. The reason to give to leave the child is to have some freedom, get away from the kids and house. That is a luxury.

And mega you don't have kids.. I've got two... that doesn't mean you don't know what you are taling about, however, like a previous poster stated... she planned to go back but just couldn't leave the little one after FMLA... everyone is different....however, in our current culture we seem to define our wants as needs... and demand that we have them...

Quite frankly after reading your posts Taysha, I think the sky is safer now that your not flying. You make no sense what so ever and you assume everything. It's always a good idea to read all posts before posting.

CHQFA00-

You came on this message board shopping for validation... some of the replies you got you didn't like...but your replies are personal. I suggest you stick to the issue.... get informed and find out what you are really getting into...

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

First off, I don't try to max out my life dude. I have a mortgage and no other debt. We save $5000 a month. Can you say the same there Sparky? My kids will have a parent at home 95% of the time. It will be either their father or mother. The other 5%, they will be hanging out with grandma or grandpa. I would have loved that as a kid.

cool...

I agree with you in a lot of what you say. I have no intention on dumping my kid off on daycare or anything like that but you are extreme. I can love my kid and my job. If my kid's father is at home with them, what is wrong with that?

I think parents who plan on tag team parenting... ie opposite schedules, only one parent home at a time, most of the time are kidding themselves.. it looks good on paper, but the reality is very difficult... some get it done, but I think there is a price...

Secondly, YOU YOU YOU....that's right YOU said you cannot love your kids and love your job. If that is the case, then you must not love your kids.

Again... it is loving your kids they way they need to be loved. Not you sending vibes across the sky...

How to pay your house on zero income? I don't know...

Stop right there.....

that's your problem but you are the one that said you cannot love your kids AND love your job so since you still need a job, maybe you should of not had kids. Make some sense Rez. You're making my head spin.

Have your kids and maybe the 'aha' moment will kick in when you are changing diapers....

 

[FlyUnited]

I have 2 and found 'getting away' a couple days a month as a Godsend.



fyi - no behaviour drugs for my kids Rez.

 

[CHQFA00]

Rez, you have lost all credibility. You have over 3700 posts on this board. If that doesn't say your not watching your kids because your on your computer too much, than I don't know what does. Yeah, you might be "home" but being on the computer constantly is not "loving your kids".

I'm done responding to your off the wall posts. I was not looking for someone to validate me, AGAIN, I WAS LOOKING FOR SOMEONE THAT HAS BEEN IN THE SISTUATION AND WONDERING WHAT THEY DID. YOU ARE NOT IN THE SITUTION. Stop posting on this thread. You have not a clue what your talking about, and as you have done on previous threads, your stiring the pot and turning this into a whole different thread.

Stick to what you know, which is obvouisly not about parenting since you spend 24/7 a week on FI.

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

Rez, you have lost all credibility. You have over 3700 posts on this board. If that doesn't say your not watching your kids because your on your computer too much, than I don't know what does. Yeah, you might be "home" but being on the computer constantly is not "loving your kids".

I'm done responding to your off the wall posts. I was not looking for someone to validate me, AGAIN, I WAS LOOKING FOR SOMEONE THAT HAS BEEN IN THE SISTUATION AND WONDERING WHAT THEY DID. YOU ARE NOT IN THE SITUTION. Stop posting on this thread. You have not a clue what your talking about, and as you have done on previous threads, your stiring the pot and turning this into a whole different thread.

Stick to what you know, which is obvouisly not about parenting since you spend 24/7 a week on FI.

I'll stop posting, when you start debating the issue and not the person...

I have 2 and found 'getting away' a couple days a month as a Godsend.

Good for you... I just don't get it.....though.. what is so terrible about being at home?

fyi - no behaviour drugs for my kids Rez.

Hey, my kids might be one them one day.... who knows... we've got issues in our culture...

BTW fly united, when you jumped all over me months ago on the FA Boston thread, you had no clue what I was talking about....

 

[CHQFA00]

Again, this was never a debate until you made it one, which by your previous posts, thats all you do on this board. Seriously, we're done. I honestly feel very sorry for you, but mostly for your wife. I'm sure your great person to be around.

 

[Secret Agent]

I have GOT to chime in here... I am also one of those pilots who had a kid and left the airline job that I loved. HOWEVER, I did continue to fly on a very part time basis to keep a small foothold on my flying career so I can go back to it when the kids are out of the house.

I love my kids to death and I am their fulltime care giver but you (Rez) have ZERO idea what it is like to be around your kids 24/7. Maybe you are lucky and have one of those wives who never complains, but every mom I know, and I know a ton now, cherishes a few hours to themselves here and there. It has nothing to do with your kids being terrible, but has everything to do with keeping your sanity.

I guess it also depends on how old your kids are and how independent they are, but those few out and backs a month rejuvenate me and make me a better mom because I am excited to see them and start over every time I get home.

I am fortunate that my kids' father or their grandmother takes them for the days that I do work. If I had to rely on daycare, maybe I would feel differently but I don't have to worry about that right now.

There are many many times when I get up early for a trip and I ask myself why I do this, but it is all about knowing yourself and about figuring out what works for you.

Like I said, the time I am away from my kids is spent missing them and if I hadn't been on the trip, all that time spent listening to them screaming and attending to their wants and needs all day and night might just put me in a grumpy mood and affect my ability to enjoy them. It is like coming up for air and I can't think of anyone who doesn't need to do that once in awhile.

Otherwise, yes, I agree with you in general about parenting and the quality of our kids today. The biggest reason I left the perfect job in the world was to help make our society a better place by helping to produce some better quality kids. So far so good, despite the fact that my scenario and yours aren't exactly the same.

 

[capt. megadeth]

Secret Agent....great post! I was actually thinking along the same lines in regards to this.....Rez doesn't stay at home 24/7. I am sure if he did, he would be begging, BEGGING for a day or two alone. :laugh: