Ole Gardner checking up on Flight Options

[SilverSurfer]

Latest form the Ole Gardner

Page 2

HIGS 'N PIGS.
Hi folks. It be me again, the ol' Gardner writin' to y'all once more.
The pilot what moved in down the road a'piece come by the cabin the
other day all bubblin' over with good news. He showed me a message from
yur big bosses announcin' yur outfit's done been sold. The message
also says yur big bosses placed orders for a bunch'a new flyin'machines
in years to come. He was so dang happy, you'd'a thought ol' Santa
dropped off his presents a few weeks early. Now, I been 'round helpin'
pilots for many'a year 'n I seen lots'a flyin' outfits bought 'n sold 'n
come 'n go. I also seen 'em place orders to get new airplanes that never
gets filled. So, I learned long ago not to count my chickens 'afore
they hatch. I be leery when I hears 'bout such buyin' 'n sellin' 'n
airplane orders.
I sees where a outfit called HIG bought yur outfit from that there
Raytheon Company what used to own it. I knows somethin' 'bout Raytheon.
It be a big deefense contractor. From what I read in the newpapers from
time to time, bein' one'a these deefense contractors comes 'bout as
close as can be to stealin' without worrin' much 'bout goin' to jail for
it. They sellin' some stuff to the government folks over yonder in
Washington for a lot more money than I can buy the same things at the
general store in town. Did y'ever see how much they chargin' for toilet
paper 'n such? Makes y'almost want to go back to tearin' pages from the
'ol Sears & Roebuck catalogue when y'heads off to the outhouse to do
yur business, don't y'know.
This here Raytheon be another deefense contractor where the bosses
gettin' rich fleecin' us poor tax payers out'a our hard earned cash with
lots'a help from 'em politicians what always got their hands out so's
their palms get greased. I been told the bosses at Raytheon wasn't too
keen on havin' yur big bosses share much money with pilots. They been
lookin' the other way while yur big bosses been takin' money away from
y'all by makin' y'pay more 'n more for yur family's health insurance. I
hear tell they didn't give y'all 'em raises they promised when they was
hopin' y'wouldn't vote in yur Union, 'n they made a bunch'a y'work
overtime this November without payin' y'for that, too.
I 'splained to my pilot friend he shouldn't be so sure things gonna get
better now that this here HIG be in charge. He says he doesn't know
what HIG stands for. Neither does I, but HIG sounds like "pig" 'n I
gots a few'a 'em dirty, smelly critters round my place. Pigs ain't
wantin' to share their foodstuffs with others much, neither. So, my pilot
friend cranked up my magic computer machine 'n we looked up this HIG
outfit on that there Internet place. We finds out HIG already owns two
other flyin' outfits. One goes by the name Amerijet 'n the other call
itself Gemini. We read what some flyers used to worked for these two
outfits had to say 'bout 'em. Mercy, we sure gots us a much different
picture 'bout 'em than their fine soundin' names let on, that be for sure.
The flyers writin' 'em messages sayin' these two outfits be scrapin'
the bottom'a the barrel by way they treatin' pilots. Some called 'em two
outfits "scumbags." Now, that kind'a language be a bit strong, so we
kept on readin' to see just why they felt that'a way. These flyers
sayin' the bosses runnin' these two outfits be even more unfriendly to
pilots 'n their unions than yur outfit's bosses be treatin' y'all. I hear
tell the HIG bosses not plannin' on dumpin' the big bosses who been so
badly runnin' yur outfit, so nothin' much likely to change for the
better unless y'all get the HIG bosses unnerstandin' y'ain't much
interested in continuin' bein' treated mean 'n unappreciated. Y'gots to send
'em that message loud 'n clear in the way that only pilots out workin'
can do.
I read where flyers at these two outfits owned by HIG done give up on
makin' things better for 'emselves. They be afraid to do their job the
way the Sheriff says they must 'cause their mean bosses be woodsheddin'
some 'n firin' others if'n they complainin' things be wrong or unsafe.
They fear for their jobs 'n not supportin' their union 'n runnin'
mighty scared. They look 'n act like mangy, whipped dogs. So, their
unions lackin' the muscle to beat the bosses at their own game.
Now, I knows there be some of y'all shakin' in yur boots anytime the
bosses be troublin' at'ya. I been told yur bosses been woodsheddin'
some'a y'all 'n even fired a small handful'a strong Union supporters for
reasons I hear tell ain't just. Such dirty tricks be 'spected, specially
when 'em nasty varmints from Ford & Harrison be 'round. Y'flyers be
fightin' a war over who rules the roost at yur outfit 'n yur big bosses
gonna try to stampede y'all away from the comin' harvest like a bunch'a
panicky cattle. They gonna try plantin' fear in yur hearts by pickin'
a small few'a y'off one by one as casualties of war. Y'just can't let
'em scare y'into not doin' what y'gots to do to win.

 

[SilverSurfer]

12/20/07 Ole Gardner

SLEIGH BELLS RINGIN'.
Happy holidays everyone. It be me, the ole Gardner writin' greetin's
to y'all at this festive time'a year. All the houses 'n buildin's 'n
trees in town look so pretty all decorated up with holly 'n garlands 'n
ornaments 'n colored lights. It be 'specially beautiful when fluffy
snowflakes come driftin' down upon 'em. All the little ones 'round these
parts wishin' for a white Christmas so's they can ride their new sleds
they just knows ole Santa bringin' 'em. I plannin' on hitchin' my
team'a horses up to my big red sleigh 'n givin' all the neighbor folks
rides, just like my dear ole Pappy used to do when I was a young'n. Golly!
The sounds'a those sleigh bells ringin' though the countryside as we
goes clippity cloppin' o'er hill 'n dale sure brings back precious
memories, don't y'know. So, I be glad helpin' out the new generation
gatherin' memories'a their own to treasure.
Like I says 'afore, I doesn't like the cold none too much. But I
keepin' myself warm when out drivin' my team by wearin' a big hat 'n
sheepskin coat 'n plenty'a heavy clothes over top my long johns. My misses 'n
I also be wrappin' ourselves up in the big thick blanket she done
sewed. A Mason jar full'a homebrew tucked by my side for sure be helpin'
stave off the cold as we go ridin' along! I hear tell pilots might not
always be warm when workin' in the cold, 'n I knows y'can't drink no
homebrew or other spirits for a while 'afore goin' to work. But, warm or
cold y'should be followin' all the flyin' rules y'knows 'bout so's
y'keepin' as safe as can be.
Y'might remember I done wrote y'all just a few weeks back 'bout
watchin' out for snow 'n ice 'n slippin'n slidin' when y'goes flyin' in
wintertime. My pilot friend says he done heard lots'a his fellow aviators
talkin' bout how helpful my writin's been talkin' 'bout things y'all
should mind when out workin'. It gonna be cold out a few more months 'n I
sure hopes y'also reads 'em winter DYKs I seen yur Union done posted on
its website. Y'might also take a gander at all 'em other DYKs posted
there talkin' 'bout lots'a other important things be keepin' y'safe 'n
out'a trouble. All 'em DYKs been wrote in that there "pilot speak"
y'flyers so keen on usin'.
There be lots'a other rules Sheriff says y'all should be followin' real
close. For instance, he says it be again' the law to be workin'
more'n a certain number hours each day. I hear tell yur bosses thinkin'
y'can be workin' extra-long days for 7 or 8 days at a stretch, with only a
few hours off in between. That seems a bit much to ask a body. But,
Sheriff says some'a his deputies says it be OK at certain times if'n
yur outfit can't control what's goin' on. He says flyers at the big
airlines can't be forced to work so many hours straight 'n gots to have at
least one day off out'a every 7 they workin'. Sort'a like in the Good
Book when the Almighty rested on the seventh day.
The rules for flyers at the big airlines says they needs more restin'
time between workin' times than y'all does. Now I knows I'm just a
simple country boy, but that doesn't make much sense 'n I talked to Sheriff
'bout it. I can't figure why pilots whats drivin' little jets has
rules makin' 'em work longer hours 'n more days with less sleep less in
between than those whats drivin' big jets. Pilots is humans, so I been
told, 'n humans is humans; work is work, rest is rest, 'n tired is
tired. Sheriff says he's thinkin' bout changin' 'em rules so's pilots
drivin' little jets has the same work 'n rest rules as those drivin' big
jets. But he ain't done it yet. Meanwhile, he says if'n y'gets too tired
workin' long schedules, 'specially when winter weather makes for
mighty long days, just tell the bosses you be "fatigued." I hear tell the
bosses unnerstand just what this here "fatigued" means 'n they be mighty
careful 'bout dealin' with it 'cause Sheriff watchin' real close.
When I was visitin' up north at the Cuyahoga County spread a couple
months back, I heard some bosses talkin' bout this here fatigue. They
says it be right for pilots to let 'em know they fatigued, just so long as
it be true 'n not some made up story to keep from workin'. That seems
fair 'n right to me. Sheriff says he be mighty interested if'n the
bosses give pilots a hard time for bein' too tired if'n caused by
schedules or weather or airplane traffic or other delays what makes days be
long. He calls it "pilot pushin'" if'n bosses be mean 'bout it. So,
if'n y'truly be too tired to work 'n a boss threatens to woodshed y'bout
it, let yur Union know as fast as y'can. 'Em Union Stewards, ready to
help y'file a report with the Sheriff 'n that there ASAP group, too,
if'n y'bein' "pushed."
Meanwhile, I gonna keep remindin' y'all to make sure yur flyin'
machines workin' just right. I been told flyin' 'round with broke parts be
again' the law 'n not too smart, especially in snow 'n ice. Write 'bout
broke parts in the 501 page book when 'n where you knowed they broke.
Workin' when y'sickly with coughs'n colds what comes out at wintertime
be a bad idea, too. The Sheriff says any pilot takin' certain
medicines sold at the general store in town what might slow him down some ain't
allowed to be flyin' no planes. Some drugs the Doc prescribes be even
worse.
Now, don't be puttin' yur crewmates, yur passengers 'n yur ownselves at
risk by doin' things y'knows y'shouldn't 'n y'doesn't have to do. The
bosses done showed plenty times they doesn't appreciate yur efforts
none, that be for sure. If'n y'workin' overtime, y'only helpin' 'em
cover up the mess they makin'a things. I hear tell the big bosses laughin'
at those fool pilots workin' extra hard to earn those tiny "bonuses"
they danglin' in front'a their noses. I asked my pilot friend if'n the
few dollars I been told the bosses offerin' really worth puttin' one's
honor down low to match theirs. He says anybody what thinks so be in
the wrong job, 'n I agrees with him. There be a name for people what
sells their souls for money, 'n folks like that ain't welcome 'round
these parts.
Well, sir, I be standin' outside my cabin takin' in the wonderous night
sky 'n breathin' in the crisp night air what's flavored with the
invitin' smell'a smoke from my fireplace. Makes a body happy just to be
alive. If'n I listens real close, I thinks I hears ole Santa's sleigh
bells way off yonder as he gettin' ready to come headin' this way.
Those'a y'out flyin' the night'a the 25th be lookin' for him 'n keepin'
clear'a his path. I been told he be on a priority flight plan 'cause he
gots lots'a miles to travel 'n so many homes to visit. We surely doesn't
want to disappoint the little ones by havin' that jolly ole elf
delayed. I hear tell he be carryin' along some special North Pole homebrew he
shares with his reindeer what helps 'em all finish their awesome
chores 'afore the sun comes up. I'd sure like to get me a Mason jar full'a
that brew someday. The recipe be even better, don't y'know!
Here's hopin' y'all has a wonderful holiday season 'n stays safe. The
families'a those pilots out workin' over the holidays be waitin' with
open arms for their speedy return. Don't be disapointin' 'em none.
Remember, if'n y'ain't a happy pilot, there be lots'a ways to let yur mean
bosses know 'bout it. The more'a y'out there lettin' 'em know how
unhappy y'be, the faster 'em bosses gonna wanna change their mean ways.
Also, if'n y'out workin' over the holidays, remember to spread the word
that the ole Gardner workin' the fields at Flight Options. Share my
writin's. The harvest—it be comin!
Happy holidays from yur friend,
THE OLE GARDNER
--
ARE YOU A HAPPY PILOT?
HAPPY PILOTS MAKE THE SYSTEM WORK BY BENDING THE RULES,
and
PILOTS CAN LET THE SYSTEM FAIL BY FOLLOWING THE RULES.
NO HEROES NEEDED, JUST DO YOUR JOB.
Y'ALL BE VERY CAREFUL OUT THERE!

 

[SilverSurfer]

12/29/07 Ole Gardner

DON'T BE NO FOOL!
Hi again everyone. It be yur friend, the Ole Gardner. Holiday season
be in full swing 'n so many friends 'n neighbors stoppin' by my cabin
to share the holiday cheer, eat some'a the misses yummy baked goodies
and sip a little homebrew from a Mason jar. My pilot friend come by 'n
done showed me a message the big boss at that there Flight Options
outfit y'all works for wrote just 'afore Christmas. The big boss be crowin'
bout how good was the bounty in 2007. After sayin' "Happy Holidays,"
he says it been so good a year that he be speedin' up payin' out the
tiny bonuses some'a y'all been bustin' yur butts for months tryin' to get
at. What fools some'a y'be.
My pilot friend 'n I be wonderin' if'n those fool pilots what be
gettin' a tiny bonus be thinkin' just how hard they workin' or what risks
they takin' or what rules they bendin' or breakin' to get at 'em.
Meanwhile, I hear tell yur Brothers 'n Sisters what flys for that NetJets
outfit down Columbus way be gettin' lots more money just workin'
normal-like for a few days than any'a the fools kissin' the bosses behinds at yur
outfit could make extra in a year, no matter how hard they tries.
I been told the reason the NetJets pilots be gettin' so much better
wages is 'cause they supports their Union 'n gots 'emselves a good
contract what says the big bosses done gots to share more'a the bounty with
'em. And, it don't make no nevermind if'n the NetJets bosses think the
bounty for the year be good 'nough or not, they gots to pay their flyers
good wages and benefits anyways. My pilot friend says NetJets pilots
doesn't pay for their families' health insurance, neither. Their big
bosses pays for it all.
Now, I knows I'm just a simple country boy, but even I can see
somethin's wrong with this here picture. The NetJets pilots gots a contract
what makes their big bosses share the harvest with 'em. But y'Flight
Options pilots ain't yet gots a contract, so yur big bosses thinks it be
OK that y'all be at the bottom rung'a the pay ladder, 'n y'works 12 more
days each year than a NetJets pilot works for his much greater pay, 'n
y'charged extra high costs for yur health insurance, 'n y'doesn't get
much'a say when y'goes on vacation, 'n if'n y'does, y'ain't left with
any sickly time off to use when needed.
Yur big bosses be smart enough to know y'all ain't gonna stand for such
differences much longer. So, they come up with their bonus program
that a few'a y'all been foolish 'nough to swallow hook line 'n sinker.
They decided on payin' the bonus early tryin' to keep the fools among
y'all appreciatin' the bosses 'n workin' extra hard to please 'em 'n
thinkin' y'doesn't need a Union or a contract. I remember years back when
P.T. Barnum brought that there big circus tent to town with all the
clowns 'n wild animals 'n midway games. He said there be a sucker born
every minute. I'll just betch'a he'd recognize foolish bonus chasin'
pilots as first-rate suckers, don't y'know!
I stopped by the First National Bank in town the other day 'n my banker
friend done told me the big bosses runnin' yur outfit usually collect
a year-end bonus'a their own. But, different from the few measly
dollars they be handin' out to the fools among y'all, they usually collect a
real bonus what often doubles their yearly income, or more. My banker
friend says it doesn't make no nevermind whether the outfit had a
bountiful year or not, the big bosses line up at the trough like the hogs
they be and get paid their bonuses anyways. No wonder the big boss be
sayin' "Happy Holidays" at the start'a his fool's bonus message. It
sure be "happy" for him 'n his "team," but not too "happy" for y'all 'n
yur "team."
Now it seems to me that y'all should be askin' the bosses some
questions. They knows which pilots be workin' extra hard to get their fool's
bonus and how much they be gettin' paid. I thinks I'd be askin' the
bosses how much'a bonus they be gettin' paid and what they done did to
deserve it. My banker friend says the bosses ain't gonna answer that
question none cause they knows just how mad y'all be if'n y'finds out. He
says flyin' outfits owned by public folks what buys and sells stock
gots to let folks know how much'a bonus bein' paid to the big bosses.
But, yur outfit be owned by a private group'a folks 'n they gonna keep the
bosses' bonuses secret.
Y'better not depend on the bosses doin' any real sharin'. Take it from
me, thay ain't gonna do it if'n y'doesn't have yurselves a contract
what says they must. If'n y'wants real sharin', y'gots to strongly
support yur Union and help it work to get y'all a contract like the NetJets
pilots done got. My pilot friend says if'n those pilots what chasin'
the fool's bonus would take time to read the NetJets contract, they'd
surely see their ain't no way the fool's bonus gonna ever match that
kind'a bounty. He says any fool could figure out that workin' extra hard
for yur outfit by flyin' overtime or workin' when sick, hungry or tired,
or flyin' broke machines, or bendin' the rules only makin' the bosses
rich. That be why they ridin' yur backs so hard.
Y'know, there be all kinds'a lists goin' 'round this time'a year. Me
'n my family made our Christmas lists hopin' ole Santa favor us with
gifts. I hear tell he keeps a list'a his own 'bout who been naughty 'n
who been nice so's he knows who to reward. Me 'n mine must'a been
'specially nice, 'cause we all done pretty good, I be happy to say. I also
wrote up a New Year's resolutions list so's I can do my part to live a
happy life 'n help make this ole world a better place this comin' year.
Helpin' the Flight Options pilots bring in a bountiful harvest be
right top that there list, don't y'know. So's I been lookin' 'round for
special lists y'all could use when y'goes to work.
I already knowed the bosses gives y'lists to follow for checkin' out
yur little jets. I been told there be other checkin' lists been posted
on that there Internet at a place called " Flightinfo.com" what lets on
'bout things yur bosses hopin' y'ain't lookin' at when inspectin' yur
machines. I also been readin' some rules the Sheriff done wrote for
pilots to follow or else they gets in a heap'a trouble. I hear tell yur
bosses done wrote some'a their own rulebooks, too. Mercy, all these
rules be so tangled up 'n hard to unnerstand 'cause they wrote in lawyer 'n
pilot speak. I sure be glad all I drives is a tractor, 'cause tractor
rules be so simple even this ole country boy can follow 'em.
My pilot friend says, just like makin' homebrew in the still out back'a
my cabin, most'a these double-talkin' rules can be boiled down to
their spirit. He says there be 12 important things he pledged to be doin'
stayin' healthy 'n safe at work that he done wrote down. He told me
when he gets back home from his next trip on the road he be bringin' his
list by my cabin so's I can see it. If'n it be as good as he says, I
be sharin' it with y'all next time I writes.
Well, friends, I be wishin' y'all Happy New Year. But, different from
yur big boss, I ain't in line for no big bonus bein' paid outta the
sweat 'n hard work 'n sacrifices by my workers. My misses 'n I ain't got
much, but we always share with those what needs it 'n those what helps
me with my chores. If'n I was yur big boss, I sure be sharin' lots
more'a the bounty with the folks what did the real work to make it happen.
Don't be no fool. The fact the big boss be takin' from y'without any
real sharin' and ain't embarrassed none 'bout doin' it be sayin' all
y'gots to know what he thinks 'bout y'all. He ain't yur friend, that be
for sure! I be yur true friend 'n I workin' the fields at Flight
Options. The harvest—it be comin'.
Happy New Year,
THE OLE GARDNER

--
ARE YOU A HAPPY PILOT?
HAPPY PILOTS MAKE THE SYSTEM WORK BY BENDING THE RULES,
and
PILOTS CAN LET THE SYSTEM FAIL BY FOLLOWING THE RULES.
NO HEROES NEEDED, JUST DO YOUR JOB.
Y'ALL BE VERY CAREFUL OUT THERE!

 

[SilverSurfer]

1/4/08 Ole Gardner's

1/4/09 Page 1


IT BE A NEW YEAR!
It be 2008 'n the ole Gardner's still here. Can y'believe it? This
ole codger done made it through 'nother year! I thinks my homebrew be
good medicine 'n has lots to do with my good health, but Doc says he
ain't so sure 'bout that. I sure sipped more'n my share'a it when the New
Year come 'round, let me tell ya. My, oh my, how time flies when
y'havin' fun. But, I hear tell it ain't much fun for y'all at this here
Flight Options outfit 'n y'ain't a bunch a happy campers. The pilot what
now lives 'round these parts says most'a y'all were on the road away
from home over the holidays. I knowed he be gone most'a the time.
Many'a y'didn't get to see the wonder in the sparklin' faces'a yur little
ones when they woke early Christmas morn 'n saw what ole Santa done
brought 'em. What a shame to miss such magical moments 'cause yur mean
bosses done sent y'away.
My pilot friend says it be normal for some crews bein' away from home
at holiday time 'cause flyin' rich folks 'round be a "24/7/365" job. I
writes real good, but I ain't never been none too smart at 'rithmetic,
so's I asks him what 'em numbers mean. He says they sayin' this kind'a
flyin' business goes on every day'a the year, all day long, holidays
or not. But, he says yur mean bosses kept most'a y'all away from home
just for spite. That be wrong, if'n y'askin' me.
While some'a y'all were surely needed to go out flyin', I hear tell way
too many'a y'spent the holidays rottin' away in grimy hotels or
sittin' 'round flyin' fields with nothin' to do cause yur machines be broke
with no one 'round to fix 'em, or there be no rich folks wantin' to go
flyin' somewhere. All y'could think 'bout was how sad you 'n yur
families was 'cause y'gone. Meanwhile, the bosses be with their families 'n
havin' fun. If'n y'on the same "team" with 'em, like they says you is,
that just doesn't seem right, does it? If'n y'had a contract, things
sure be different.
Last time I writes I told y'all 'bout the New Year's resolution
list'a12 important things my pilot friend pledged he be doin' stayin' healthy
'n safe at work. He says he got the idea after a NetJets pilot he
knows done showed him "The Pledge" list they once used when their bosses
were treatin' 'em mean 'afore their Union got 'em a contract. He come by
my cabin the other day 'n read me his list, which he calls the "Dirty
Dozen." Best I remembers, this be what he says 'bout it:
1) He ain't ignorin' broke parts on his flyin' machine 'n he always
writes in the 501 page book 'bout findin' broke parts when 'n where they
be found broke.
He says it makes no nevermind if'n his crewmate thinks parts ain't
broke too bad. Broke is broke! He doesn't wait to tell the bosses 'bout
broke parts or carry 'em till it be more convenient for the bosses to
get 'em fixed. He talks lots with the folks what's supposed to fix 'em
up, 'specially when they says they can't find broke parts on the ground
what wasn't workin' when the plane be flyin' along. He says some'a
these folks writes tall tales in the 501 page book 'bout fixin' things
when they really doesn't. He calls such tomfoolery "pencil whippin'."
I'll tell y'truly—'em kind'a dishonest folks needs a good whippin'a their
own out back the woodshed. The pilot says if'n he finds "pencil
whippin'," he writes 'bout it to that there ASAP 'n lets yur Union know 'n
gives the Sheriff a call on his "hotline."
2) He ain't flyin' tired 'n ain't flyin' with no crewmate what's
tired, neither, even if'n that crewmate wants to keep on flyin'.
He lets the bosses know if'n he be tired or "fatigued," so the bosses
can get him a place to bed down to rest some, if'n he be on the road, or
find someone else to go flyin', if'n he be home.
3) He ain't answerin' the phone or that there Blackberry gadget he
carries when he's not on duty 'n supposed to be restin' between flights or
on days off.
He says if'n the bosses wants to be talkin' at him, they gots to do it
when he be workin', not when he restin' or on days off. If'n they
barge into his rest, he lets 'em know if'n he now be fatigued 'n too tired
to go flyin' until a later time.
4) He ain't flyin' sickly 'n ain't flyin' with no crewmate what's
feelin' sickly, neither, even if'n that crewmate wants to go flyin'.
He says it be extra hard flyin' yur best if'n y'sickly, 'n a pilot
what's sickly can make other folks ridin' on these little jets sickly, too.
I hear tell the bosses doesn't give y'much time off if'n y'sickly,
hopin' y'come flyin' when y'shouldn't. But, y'can't let 'em do y'like
that. Y'gots to stay home if'n y'sickly, even if'n y'ain't gonna get
paid none. Sheriff says if'n y'takin' certain kinds'a snake oil
medicines, y'can't go flyin', neither, even if'n it makes y'feel better. I been
told once y'gets a contract, y'be gettin' much better paid time off
if'n y'sickly, 'n real vacations when y'wants 'em, too.
5) He ain't lettin' the bosses bully him into breakin' the rules or
flyin' when he shouldn't or not doin' his job right.
He says it be his "ethics" as a professional pilot to do his job right.
He calls the bosses' bullyin' ways "pilot pushin'," 'n he tellin'
ASAP 'n yur Union 'n callin' Sheriff's "hotline" if'n it happens. He says
he always followin' the rules 'n works strickly by the book. He says
some flyers at yur outfit breakin' rules cause they scared'a the bosses
or just wantin' to get a few extra dollars out'a the bosses' fool's
bonus programs, like that there Judas in the Good Book once done for a
few pieces'a silver. He doesn't cotton much with folks what's so
cowardly 'n dishonorable 'n doesn't ever sit a meal or share any homebrew with
'em kind on the road, neither.
6) He always talkin' with his crewmate 'bout what they gonna be doin'
with the flyin' machine 'afore beginnin' to taxi.
Y'know, I always did wonder why movin' a plane on the ground be called
"taxi." I went to the big city once 'n saw lots'a yellow taxis, but
they doesn't look like planes movin' 'round to me. Lots'a things 'bout
this flyin' business sure gots me stumped! Anyways, the pilot says if'n
he 'n his crewmate ain't yet done all their chores, they takes as long
as need be gettin' things done just right. They doesn't rush 'n
doesn't go flyin' till they gets 'em all done the way they should be.
7) He always treatin' other workers with courtesy 'n doesn't lose his
temper or use bad language when speakin' with 'em.
He says there be workers called dispatchers, schedulers, mechanics,
owner representatives 'n such, 'n the bosses treatin' most'a 'em mean,
too. He says he ain't doin' other folks jobs for 'em none, 'specially
when they doin' it wrong'n messin' things up. He let's these folks do
their job their own way, even if'n it costs the bosses extra money, so
long as it be safe 'n legal. It be their job, not his, 'n they gots to
figure out by their ownselves how to fix it if'n they mess up.
8) He ain't helpin' the bosses by flyin' overtime or doin' no extra
chores when they be treatin' him so mean 'n not even payin' him nearly
'nough wages for workin' regular time.
He knows lots'a fellow pilots been leavin' yur outfit 'n the bosses
ain't got 'nough flyers 'round to do all the work without overtime. I
hear tell they ain't hirin' the new pilots they needin' cause experienced
folks talkin' 'bout how bad a place to work this Flight Options outfit
be, 'specially compared to that there NetJets outfit where pilots done
reaped such a bountiful harvest.
9) He ain't tellin' any pilots he knows what wants to drive little
jets that yur outfit be a good place to work till the big bosses show
proper respect 'n worry for pilots 'n their families.
He doesn't want his friends 'n neighbors bein' treated badly like he
bein' treated. He ain't helpin' yur outfit findin' new pilots or new
customers to come flyin', neither, till the big bosses writes up a good
contract with yur Union sayin' they gonna change their mean ways 'n begin
payin' fair wages 'n benefits 'n such, like the NetJets pilots done
got with their new contract.
10) He ain't lookin' at becomin' a boss hisself 'n ridin' roughshod or
rattin' on his Union Brothers 'n Sisters none, neither.
He says he ain't gonna wallow in the bosses' dung heap along side 'em
mean folks what's already in there. He says good Union members help
protect their comrades-in-arms, not hurt 'em. The bosses ain't his
friends, 'n he ain't lookin' to make 'em so by lickin' their boots, none.
11) He always wantin' to be safe 'n 'spects other workers 'n folks what
sells or buys stuff from yur outfit to be safe 'n always doin' what's
right 'n followin' all the rules.
He knows one bad apple can surely spoil the barrel for all the good
folks in this flyin' business if'n it causes an accident where someone get
'emselves badly hurt or worse.
12) He always supportin' his Union 'n payin' his dues on time.
He knows without support 'n money to do things what needs doin', the
harvest be late comin', if'n it comes at all. He wants the Union stayin'
'round watchin' out for him 'n his family.

 

[SilverSurfer]

1/4/08 Ole Gardner's

Page 2 1/4/08 Ole Gardner



Well, sir, that be my pilot friend's New Year's list. He says he's
always mindful'a this list when rich folks what's payin' big bucks to ride
on his little jet be 'round, 'cause their lives be in his hands. They
deserve the best 'n safest flyin' he can give 'em, so he follows all
the rules exactly 'n doesn't cut no corners just to help the bosses out.
Y'know, I read his list over 'n over 'n the things it says seems so
simple 'n smart. In fact, they be so right I thinks my pilot friend be
wrong callin' 'em the "Dirty Dozen." There be nothin' dirty 'bout
what's on his list. So, I done renamed his list the "Trusty Twelve," or
the "Ts," for short, 'n I be tellin' him so next time I sees him.
Yes, sir, it be the New Year! I knows the checkered fields below look
so cold 'n barren when y'all sees 'em from the sky as y'flys over this
winter. My fields look all quiet when I sees 'em through my cabin's
frosty windows. But, shortly after snows begin meltin', the fields be
plowed 'n seeds be planted 'n crops be comin' up soon 'nough. The
growin' season be only a few short months away.
Still, there be lots'a things we country folks be doin' this winter
while waitin'. Most important, we lookin' real close at our machines 'n
makin' sure they fixed 'n runnin' good for when we needs 'em. Winter be
a 'specially good time to get all broke parts fixed. Don't forget,
Sheriff says y'gots to write 'bout broke parts on yur flyin' machines in
the 501 page book when 'n where y'finds 'em broke—no ifs, ands or buts,
don't y'know. If'n y'gets sickly with a cold, or the flu, or some
other crud 'n ain't at yur best, he says it be right to let the bosses
know y'stayin' put till y'feelin' better. Winter just got started, so be
extra careful when ice 'n snow be 'round. 'Specially don't be workin'
no overtime when y'needn't. If'n y'ain't a happy 'n healthy pilot,
y'gots to for sure let yur mean bosses know y'ain't gonna do more'n the
bare minimum required.
Here's wishin' y'the best in the comin' year. I knows there be bounty
just waitin' for y'all. But there be much to do 'afore the harvest
comes in. I be here to help y'all gettin' it done. Yur Union also here
to help, but it needs yur support 'n dues paid on time to do its job,
don't y'know. I knows it be hard stayin' patient, 'specially when yur
bosses be so mean. But, have faith in knowin' that gonna change when
y'has a contract. Just like my pilot friend says he done, y'should pledge
'n make resolutions to follow that there list'a "Ts" to the "T," 'n
help others pledge 'bout followin' it, too. I hear tell followin' the
list'a "Ts" be the proven way to get the bosses' to 'ventually change
their mean ways. It worked at NetJets! Remember to tell yur friends 'n
neighbors the ole Gardner workin' the fields at Flight Options 'n share
my writin's with 'em. The harvest—it be comin'.
Happy New Year from yur true friend,
THE OLE GARDNER

--
ARE YOU A HAPPY PILOT?
HAPPY PILOTS MAKE THE SYSTEM WORK BY BENDING THE RULES,
and
PILOTS CAN LET THE SYSTEM FAIL BY FOLLOWING THE RULES.
NO HEROES NEEDED, JUST DO YOUR JOB.
Y'ALL BE VERY CAREFUL OUT THERE!

 

[SilverSurfer]

1/12/08 Ole Gardner

Page 1 1/12/08

AIN'T NO SILVER BULLETS!


Hi everyone, it be me again, the ole Gardner. With the holidays over
'n winter hard upon us, there ain't been much to do 'round these parts.
So, I been spendin' more'n more time messin' with that there magical
computer machine I done gots 'n I gettin' pretty good at makin' it do
what I wants. My misses says I gettin' addicted, cause I spendin' so
much time playin' with it. I been readin' on yur Union's website where
some'a y'all been thinkin' yur Union should be doin' more to help
speed-up negotiations for a new contract, like yur Brothers 'n Sisters at
that there NetJets outfit done gots.
Some pilots sayin' they thinkin' it be a good idea if'n yur Union be
writin' letters to the bosses at that there HIG group, what now be yur
outfit's new owners, 'n lettin' 'em know how unhappy y'all be that this
here Flight Options outfit bein' run so poorly. Y'wants to tell 'em
just how bad a mess yur big bosses be makin'a things. Some other pilots
wantin' to send messages to the rich folks y'flyin' 'round 'bout how bad
yur outfit's bein' run 'n how poorly y'all bein' treated by yur
bosses. It be easy thinkin' letter writin' like this gonna get things
changed. But y'dead wrong if'n y'thinkin' that'a way.
I done told y'all when I first started writin' that I been out helpin'
lots'a flyers at the big airlines bring in their own bountiful harvest
from time to time over many'a year. At more'n one'a these outfits some
pilots always come up with the same kind'a ideas. Some flyers always
thinkin' the Union ain't doin' 'nough to get the message out to the
folks what invests in these flyin' outfits, or the business folks sittin'
on the boards runnin' 'em, or the passengers what ridin' on 'em. They
must be thinkin' these folks be livin' in some dark mushroom cave 'n
doesn't know what's goin' on 'n they gonna want pilots treated better
if'n the Union just gets 'round to askin'. Mercy, mercy!
Y'know, from what I seen, pilots be really smart men 'n women. But,
they gots two mighty bad habits in the way they thinks: Firstly, they
always wantin' to re-invent the wheel 'n not wantin' to listen' much to
Union folks what come 'afore 'em 'n; secondly, they gots mighty short
memories 'n always needin' fresh remindin'a things what happened in the
past. I hear tell that's why there be checkin' lists on yur flyin'
machines—to make sure y'doesn't forget to do 'em things what other pilots
found out 'bout doin' the hard way, 'n to make sure y'doesn't just come
up with yur own way'a doin' things what might get y'hurt or in trouble.
But, as hard as I look, I ain't findin' no checkin' lists for pilots
splainin' how to best help their Union work the fields to bring in the
harvest, 'cept for my pilot friend's list'a "Ts" I done wrote y'bout last
time. I hear tell that be 'cause some high-falootin' federal judges
say if'n the Union puts out any such kind'a lists it be again' that
there Train Labor Law I done been told 'bout. That be too bad, 'cause from
what I been learnin', not much has changed since soon after the Wright
brothers come up with the flyin' machine 'n the first bosses decided
that carryin' mail 'n folks 'round the country with airplanes be a good
way to get rich. Pilots been treated mean by their bosses right from
the get-go 'n many flyers done lost their lives in the early days
'cause'a the "pilot pushin'" goin' on back then.
When I was a young'n I remember hearin' 'em rickty ole craft flyin' low
just over the treetops dodgin' the clouds day 'n night. One unlucky
soul done paid the ultimate price just 'afore the big world war when he
smacked into a hill just south'a town one rainy night. Sheriff says
the investigation showed this poor fellow didn't want to go flyin' none,
but told his buddies he was scared'a bein' fired by the boss if'n he
didn't. I been told many'a y'all still scared the same way 'n just do
what y'can to please the bosses. The biggest difference between then 'n
now is 'em pioneer aviators didn't have much in the way'a government
rules 'bout drivin' flyin' machines 'n they didn't have no union to make
sure the bosses be followin' 'em rules, neither. Now, I knows y'all
gots yourself a Union, but I hear tell some frightened pilots ain't
supportin' it the right way 'n not payin' dues for negotiations.
I remember readin' down at the town library somethin' a very smart man
once said that I done wrote down word for word. He said, "Those who
cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it." Well, sir, 'em be
wise words 'n he be tellin' y'like it is. I ain't had me much schoolin'
none, but I been on this earth long 'nough to know that history be
one'a the best teachers 'bout what to 'spect in the future. How it worked
yesterday probably be how it gonna work tomorrow. Fact is, things
ain't changed much between pilots 'n their bosses in nearly 100 years of
commercial aviation. A whinin' letter or two to the bosses 'n passengers
ain't never changed a dang thing 'n it ain't never gonna. What these
folks pay most nevermind to is if'n the planes be runnin' safe 'n on
time, don't y'know.
If'n y'been 'round different kinds'a pilots as much as me, you'd for
sure know some always wantin' owners 'n passengers to be mindful'a how
bad they bein' treated 'n hopin' these folks gonna do somethin' 'bout it.
What these flyers really sayin' is they wants other folks doin' the
hard work'a fightin' the bad guys for 'em. They 'spectin' someone like
the Lone Ranger to come ridin' to town on a white horse with his
six-shooters loaded with silver bullets, just like he once did on that ole TV
show some time back. Well, sir, there ain't no Lone Ranger or silver
bullets in yur future! The only person what's gonna save yur butt 'n
make things right be the guy y'sees starin' back at ya when y'looks in
the mirror each mornin'. That face be the face'a yur personal hero. No
one else 'cept yur family 'n yur Brother 'n Sister Union members 'n me
gives a darn 'bout how y'bein treated at work. NO ONE!
Trust me when I says the bosses runnin' HIG doesn't care a cat's
whisker 'bout what y'thinks or how mean y'bein' treated or how hard y'workin'
or how little y'gettin' paid. They provin' that by the way they'
treatin' pilots at the other flyin' outfits HIG owns. I done already wrote
y'some 'bout that a few weeks back when I talked 'bout "HIGs 'n Pigs."
If'n y'ever gets a chance to talk to flyers what works for one'a
these HIG flyin' outfits, ask 'em what they thinks. I bettin' they ain't
gonna paint ya a pretty picture none. All these HIG bosses cares 'bout
is money—their money, not yurs! They ain't no different than the
bosses at many'a the big airlines I seen. To them y'all needed only 'cause
someone with a pilot's license gots to drive the plane, 'n they intend
to control y'as much as possible, work y'as hard as they can, even if
it might be again' the law, 'n pay y'as little as can be.
I been told by my friend what runs the First National Bank in town that
this HIG be a fancy outfit what invests billions 'n billions'a dollars
in all kinds'a businesses. He says if'n y'thinks they didn't do their
homework 'n doesn't know everythin' there is to know 'bout yur outfit,
y'bein' mighty foolish. I hear tell HIG has all kinds'a accountants
'n lawers 'n college-learned folks what looks mighty closely at any
outfits they gonna buy. They turns over every rock, looks in every corner,
inspects each nook 'n cranny, talks to all kinds'a folks 'bout the
outfit—not just yur big bosses—'n check out all the books 'n bank accounts
'n business stuff yur outfit be doin'. Y'can be sure 'afore they
signed the for sale papers, they knowed everythin' they wanted 'n needed to
know 'bout yur outfit. My pilot friend what lives 'round these parts
says they didn't talk none to any flyers he knows 'n they didn't talk
none to yur Union. Y'all be just hired hands to 'em 'n they ain't very
interested in what y'thinkin'.
My banker friend says yur big bosses can't begin to hold a candle to
the smart folks what's runnin' HIG 'n they didn't pull any wool over
their eyes none, neither. He says yur big bosses ain't fit to share the
same slop trough with these much smarter HIG pigs. I been told y'can't
tell 'em HIG folks nothin' in a letter y'might write 'bout the way yur
outfit bein' run what they doesn't already know. My banker friend says
either they doesn't care or they thinks the way it bein' run be OK for
the very reasons they done bought yur outfit out in the first place.
He says it could be to fix it up 'n make money, or it could be to let
yur big bosses run it into the ground so it can be sold off for parts 'n
get more money much quicker. Time will tell 'n y'ain't gonna change
the HIG bosses' minds none with some kind'a letter whinin' bout how
unhappy y'all be.

 

[SilverSurfer]

1/12/08 Ole Gardner

Page 2 1/12/08

One thing I does know, the longer it takes for yur Union to get y'all a
contract, the more millions'a dollars the HIG bosses be takin' home
for themselves. If'n y'really wants to get 'em to pay some nevermind to
what's goin' on at Flight Options, y'gots to fully support yur Union 'n
pay yur dues. Also be sure to follow exactly my pilot friend's list'a
"Ts." If'n yur outfit's operation keeps grindin' to a halt cause the
pilots be unhappy 'n ain't no longer greasin' the wheels, the HIG
bosses start wantin' to fix it up if'n it messin' up the plans they had for
yur outfit when they done bought it.
Like I says, I seen this work at lots'a big airlines 'afore 'n also at
that there NetJets outfit a couple'a years back. Followin' the rules
exactly gets the attention'a investors 'n bosses each 'n every time.
From what I seen, letters to the bosses ain't even worth bein' takin' out
back to the outhouse for cleanin' up after, if'n y'knows what I mean.
Writin' letters to the rich folks y'all flyin' 'round ain't no
better. They doesn't seem to care much, neither. Y'all just the hired help
to most'a 'em rich folks, too.
I hear tell many'a these rich folks leavin' as fast as they can for
other flyin' outfits, anyways, 'n ain't none too interested in tryin' to
fix-up what's wrong with yurs. I been told many ain't none too happy
with yur big bosses 'n they takin' their business elsewhere. They
already knows yur big bosses be makin' a mess'a things, so there be no need
to write these folks any kind'a letter 'bout that, don't y'know. My
pilot friend says yur big bosses tryin' to get out'a the little jet plane
time-share ownin' business 'n get more into airplane managin' 'n
charter businesses. Losin' a time-share owner now'n then might just be
helpin' yur bosses speed up the change to these other kind'a flyin'
businesses.
I sure hopes those pilots what's comin' up with this writin' letters to
the bosses idea they been postin' on the Union's website, as if'n they
done found some kind'a wonderous, new fangled thought that be bright
as a shiny copper penny, been readin' what I be writin'. There ain't
much new under the sun in the way pilots bein' treated at flyin' outfits.
My pilot friend says he been told the outside experts 'n advisors
what's helpin' run yur Union done seen it all 'n be givin' yur leaders
good advice 'bout what be the best 'n legal path to follow. The ole
Gardner also done seen what works 'n what doesn't.
Well, sir, that be it for now. Sorry if'n some'a my messages be a bit
long winded. But I gots so much information to share with y'all to
help y'from makin' the same mistakes I seen other pilots make what
wouldn't listen to those what come 'afore 'em. I truly hope y'all thinkin'
'bout 'n sharin' my writin's. Remember, there ain't no silver bullets 'n
the fight be up to each'a y'all to carry-on. If'n y'wants to get the
bosses to pay y'all some nevermind 'n speed up the harvest, then y'gots
to stop greasin' the wheels 'n be sure to follow that there list'a
"Ts" to a "T." As always, remember to spread the word that the ole
Gardner workin' the fields at Flight Options. The harvest—it be comin'.
Stay healthy 'n warm 'n fly safe,
THE OLE GARDNER.

--
ARE YOU A HAPPY PILOT?
HAPPY PILOTS MAKE THE SYSTEM WORK BY BENDING THE RULES,
and
PILOTS CAN LET THE SYSTEM FAIL BY FOLLOWING THE RULES.
NO HEROES NEEDED, JUST DO YOUR JOB.
Y'ALL BE VERY CAREFUL OUT THERE!

 

[SilverSurfer]

Don't Be No Rat!

DON'T BE NO RAT!

It be winter, for sure, 'n the ole Gardner thinkin' 'bout you flyers
out workin' in the cold for this here Flight Options outfit. I knows
this time'a year be kind'a rough on y'all, 'n lots'a pilots' home lives
done suffered 'cause'a bad weather, broke machines 'n mighty poor
schedulin' from the bosses back at the Cuyahoga County spread up north.
Many'a y'all done missed Thanksgivin' 'n Christmas 'n New Years at home with
yur families. That be a sad thing.
I promised y'all I'd learn 'bout ASAP, so's I done me some talkin' with
my pilot friend 'bout it. He says ASAP be a special safety program
the Sheriff, yur Union 'n the bosses done agreed 'bout. I been told it
sort'a like a 3-legged stool what needs all three legs to stand up.
If'n one leg be missin', the program doesn't work. My pilot friend says
if'n a flyer thinks he might'a accidentally done somethin' wrong, or
been asked to do somethin' wrong by a boss or somebody else, he should
quickly let this here ASAP know 'bout it 'n they be lookin' into it. I
hear tell Sheriff says pilots what be reportin' to ASAP not gettin'
'emselves in any kind'a trouble for things they done, so long as they didn't
do 'em on purpose. There be rules for reportin' to ASAP 'n I doesn't
know 'em all. But yur Union sure knows 'n be glad to help y'with
reportin' if'n y'gives 'em Stewards a call.
Sheriff says he for sure wants to know if'n any bosses askin' pilots to
break the rules or go out flyin' when they shouldn't cause they sickly
or tired or the flyin' machine be broke. I hear tell some bosses
wantin' pilots to wait writin' in the 501 page books till it more
convenient to fix 'em up. Sheriff calls such kind'a foolishness "pilot
pushin'." If'n this be happenin' to you, let ASAP know 'n for sure call yur
Union so's it can be makin' complaints with the big bosses against the
folks what be doin' the "pushin'."
If'n he flyin' with a crewmate he thinks be doin' the job wrong, my
pilot friend says he tries workin' things out between 'em. If'n the
crewmate wantin' to do somethin' that be clearly again' the law or downright
dangerous, my pilot friend says he lets the crewmate know he ain't
goin' flyin' with him. But, if'n it just be the crewmate rubbin' him the
wrong way, my friend says yur Union gots a special committee called
"Professional Standards" to help work things out between y'all. He calls
it "Pro-Stan," for short.
I seen this kind'a committee 'afore at all the big airlines 'n I knows
how good it be at helpin' pilots settle spats what grows up when y'out
workin' together. I hear tell Pro-Stan workin' just fine at that there
NetJets outfit down Columbus way. 'Em bosses works with Pro-Stan to
keep pilot spats from steamin' up. I been told the big bosses at yur
outfit thinks yur Union gonna "pay" for Pro-Stan by wantin' less'a other
things in the negotiations for yur contract. So's they holdin' out
from workin' with Pro-Stan folks till then.
My pilot friend says yur Union ain't gonna pay one thin dime for the
bosses to work with Pro-Stan or any other committee. He says Pro-Stan
folks doesn't need the bosses involved none to be workin', 'cause
Pro-Stan works just fine without 'em. I been told yur Union 'spects the
bosses gonna 'ventually come 'round to workin' with Pro-Stan, no matter
what. In fact, they be eager to do it, 'cause it be takin' some chores
off'n their backs. Meanwhile, the bosses wantin' y'all rattin' on one
'nother so's they be gettin' pilots in trouble. Don't be fallin' for the
bosses traps none 'n tellin' tales on yur fellow Union members. They
be yur comrades-in-arms. If'n y'havin' spats with someone at work, call
yur Union's Pro-Stan folks. They wantin' to help 'n doesn't let the
bosses know 'bout it none. I been told 'em Union Stewards have
Pro-Stan's phone numbers to share 'with y'all, if'n y'just ask.
I hear tell some'a the bosses been askin' real "friendly" like for
pilots to chat on the phone or write e-mail messages usin' computer
machines or 'em little Blackberry gadgets y'all carries 'round talkin' bout
what they been doin' or what some other pilots been doin' at work. I
been told some bosses even been havin' talks with flyers what come by the
Cuyahoga County spread as they passin' through town. Then, 'afore
y'knows it, up jumps the devil.
The bosses usin' what they done learned to woodshed pilots what done
spoke or wrote it. Some pilots what been fooled that'a way been
woodshedded without first bein' invited on a "CGF-1 Arrival," where they
could'a had a Union Steward helpin' protect 'em from the trickery 'n
dishonesty these bosses done gots foulin' their souls. From what I seen 'n
heard, y'just can't trust a single one'a 'em mean bosses y'all works for
none, at all.
I done watched lots'a TV shows in my day 'n seen police tell folks they
doesn't need say nothin' if'n they doesn't want to, 'cause what they
says can be used again' 'em. Police also gots to let folks know they
can have lawyers help 'em if'n they wants. It be called readin' 'em
"Miranda rights," or some such name, 'n that there Supreme Court in
Washington done says police gots to say it. I remember a Latin singer named
Carmen Miranda many'a years back what used to wear a hat looked like a
big fruit basket perched on her head. Wonder if'n this Miranda readin'
be named for her, cause knowin' yur "Miranda rights" might just keep
y'from "singin'" when y'shouldn't, don't y'know.
But, I been told 'em judges says there ain't no "Miranda rights" at
work. Yur bosses ain't the police 'n they needn't let y'know y'can get
yur ownself in a heap'a trouble by talkin' or writin' 'bout stuff
y'might'a done or seen at work. The bosses ain't none too keen on lettin'
y'know they be settin' traps for you or some other flyer.
My pilot friend showed me a message the Stewards done posted on the
Union's website a few weeks back talkin' 'bout what to do if'n y'asked to
have a "friendly" chat or send a e-mail to a boss 'bout things
y'might'a done or seen at work. The Stewards say y'should first ask the boss
what he plannin' on doin' to y'bout it. If'n he says y'ain't gonna get
in any kind'a trouble 'n ain't gonna get a trip to the woodshed, ask
him to send you a message sayin' just that. If'n the boss says he might
be woodsheddin' ya or won't send a message sayin' he ain't gonna,
y'shouldn't talk or write 'bout what he wantin' to know till y'speaks to
one'a 'em Stewards first. The Steward be helpin' y'send the boss the
right kind'a answer.
I hear tell yur Union done negotiated a rule for y'all what says if'n
the bosses thinkin' 'bout woodsheddin' ya, they gots to first give an
invite to a "CGF-1 Arrival" meetin' at the Cuyahoga County spread where
the bosses be investigatin' what y'might'a done or seen at work. Y'can
have a Steward come along, but the bosses ain't lettin' y'bring no
lawyers. So, if'n y'does gets an invite for a "CGF-1 Arrival," call yur
Union right away 'n they be sendin' a Steward along when y'comes to the
Cuyahoga County spread to meet with the bosses.
Some bosses been tellin' pilots they ain't gonna be woodshedded, but
they wants 'em to rat on their fellow Union members. If'n that happens,
for sure call yur Union so's a Steward can help y'not sayin' or writin'
things y'doesn't have to say or write that might get other flyers in a
heap'a trouble. Y'doesn't want to be known as a rat among yur
friends. There already be enough rats skulkin' 'round yur outfit workin' as
mean bosses. They for sure ain't yur friends none.
Well, sir, even though it be cold out, there still be lot's a chores to
do 'round this here place. I knows there be lots'a chores y'flyers
gots to do when you're out workin' in the cold, too. Do the work y'bein'
paid to do, even though y'ain't bein' paid much at all, 'specially
compared to yur Brothers 'n Sisters at that there NetJets outfit. But,
y'shouldn't do a dang thing y'doesn't need or have to do, 'specially if'n
it be a job others supposed to be doin', but doin' badly. Ain't yur
job to be cleanin' up after 'em 'n makin' things right or fillin' in the
holes by flyin' overtime, neither. Don't be drivin' machines with
broke parts; don't be flyin' sickly, hungry or tired; don't be workin'
overtime; and don't be no rat against yur fellow Union members. Don't be
takin' no chances, or be bendin' the rules none. If'n y'aint happy,
y'shouldn't be fixin' things for 'em bosses what treatin' y'mean and
makin' y'sad. Happy pilots be the "grease" what keeps the wheels a'any
flyin' outfit turnin' just right, don't y'know.
Stay safe, yur friend,
THE OLE GARDNER

--
ARE YOU A HAPPY PILOT?
HAPPY PILOTS MAKE THE SYSTEM WORK BY BENDING THE RULES,
and
PILOTS CAN LET THE SYSTEM FAIL BY FOLLOWING THE RULES.
NO HEROES NEEDED, JUST DO YOUR JOB.
Y'ALL BE VERY CAREFUL OUT THERE!

 

[SilverSurfer]

"x" Marks The Spot!

"X" MARKS THE SPOT!

Hello everyone, it be your friend, the ole Gardner. I doesn't know
much 'bout what's happenin' where y'all live, but 'round these parts it
been a might bit chilly. I already done mentioned I doesn't like the
cold much none 'n that there global warmin' I been readin' 'bout ain't
helpin' me keep comfy this winter. No, sir, a cracklin' log fire 'n a sip
or two'a homebrew from'a Mason jar now'n then be what I usin' to stave
off the cold. My pilot friend come by the cabin when he got back from
his last trip on the road 'n he had lots'a news to share with me 'bout
the goin's on at that there Flight Options outfit y'all works for.
He showed me some messages the big bosses done wrote sayin' they gonna
be takin' on some new flyin' machines some rich folks own that they be
lettin' your outfit manage for 'em. I thought this be good news for
y'all, cause I hear tell most'a the planes yur outfit's now flyin' 'round
gettin' kind'a ratty lookin' 'n with lots'a broke parts fallin' off.
Then I read the fine print in the message 'bout one'a these machines
called a "Citation X."
It seems the big bosses changin' all the rules 'bout who gonna be
drivin' this new "X" machine 'n how much they gonna get paid doin' it. My
pilot friend says when new flyin' machines be added to yur outfit's
fleet in the past, all pilots got to "bid" on the chance to drive it. He
says those pilots been 'round the longest with the bestest seniority
gets first choice. If'n they didn't already know how to fly the new
planes, the big bosses got 'em schoolin' to learn how. We got some'a the
same kind'a rules down on the farm, don't y'know. There be 'a peckin'
order 'mongst all the barnyard animals 'bout who gets the bestest 'n
mostest food to eat 'n where to bed down when night comes.
Now yur big bosses be sayin' those pilots what doesn't know how to
drive this new bird can't even bid 'n those what already knows how can move
right to the head'a the line with no nevermind for their seniority
peckin' order. But, I hear tell there be one hitch in the giddy-up, even
for these folks. Any pilot what wants to drive this new machine gots
to live right near the flyin' field where the rich guy what owns this
plane has his barn. I been told the new flyin' field be just outside'a
Denver. I done visited Denver a time or two 'n it sure be a beautiful
city with the purple mountains risin' high just to the West. But, I
knows not everyone wants to live there. I sure doesn't, 'cause I hear
tell that place gonna run out'a water some day.
So, I asks my pilot friend what's gonna happen if'n none'a the pilots
workin' for yur outfit what knows how to drive a "X" machine wants to up
'n move to Denver for this here new job. He says that be where the
real rub comes in. Yur bosses plannin' on hirin' two new pilots off'n
the street what already knows how to drive this new plane. Even though
these new hires gonna be put at the very bottom'a the seniority peckin'
order, the big bosses plannin' on payin' these new flyers more money'n
the rest'a y'all what's been here for years gettin' paid for drivin'
yur outfit's tired old flyin' machines. That be rubbin' y'all's faces in
the dirt just a bit much, don't y'think?
If'n I was a pilot what's been workin' for yur outfit for any length'a
time 'n the big bosses done wrote me a message sayin' they gonna
trample on my seniority peckin' order so's I can't bid to drive this new
machine or live where I darn well please, I'd be hoppin' mad, don't y'know.
That'd be 'specially true when I figured out that a couple'a new
pilots might be hired off'n the street to take my rightful place 'n get
paid many thousands'a dollars more'n I gettin' paid for doin' my job.
My pilot friend says yur Union tryin' to negotiate with the big bosses
'bout comin' up with rules 'bout who 'mongst y'all gonna get the job'a
drivin' this new "X" machine, when they gots to work, where they gots
to live 'n what they gets paid. But, I been told the bosses ain't too
eager on meetin' with yur Union to talk 'bout it. In fact, I hear tell
the big bosses ain't too keen on meetin' regular with yur Union more'n
3 or 4 days each month to talk 'bout writin' a good 'n fair contract
like 'em flyers at that there NetJets outfit done got. From what I seen,
yur big bosses just doesn't respect y'all what be doin' the real work
that be makin' 'em big bosses rich.
So, what y'all gonna do 'bout it? As I sees it, y'gots yurselves two
choices. If'n y'wants, y'can put yur heads in the sand, like the silly
scared ostrich I seen in a picture in that there "National Geographic"
magazine they gots down at the town library, 'n hope against hope yur
bosses gonna change their mean ways. Let me clue y'in folks—they ain't
gonna change without y'all havin' a contract says they gotta. Or,
y'can stand up for what be rightfully yurs, like the brave men 'n women I
knows most'a y'all to be, 'n let the bosses know for sure y' mighty
unhappy 'n ain't gonna take it no more 'n want that contract sooner, rather
than later. Y'gots to let 'em know y'be sick 'n tired'a 'em big
bosses draggin' their feet in how they goin' bout the negotiations with yur
Union.
Let the"X" from that there new "X" machine mark the spot where
y'drawin' a line in the sand! For those'a y'all what ain't yet been followin'
my advice, let yur bosses know 'nough be 'nough. No more drivin' broke
flyin' machines! No more workin' when y'tired, hungry or sickly! No
more bendin' the rules! No more answerin' the phone when y'restin' or
on days off! No more workin' overtime! No more doin' other folks jobs
for 'em! No more doin' the bosses any kind'a favors! No more buyin'
into the tall tales 'n false stories the bosses spreadin' bout yur
Union 'n its officers! No more "greasin'" the wheels to get the mission
done! No more! NO MORE!
Well, sir, January be movin' quickly along 'n afore y' knows it
Valentine's day be here. Soon after comes Spring. All you Flight Options
pilots what be strong, dues-payin' Union members gots lots to be proud of.
Y'all gonna win this fight with the bosses if'n y'keeps yur eyes on
the prize, which be a fair contract, like yur fellow strong Union
supportin' Brothers 'n Sisters at NetJets done gots 'emselves. Follow that
there list'a "Ts" I done already wrote y'all 'bout as closely as can be.
It truly be the answer to makin' yur outfit a much better 'n safer
place to work. Even though there be lots more work to do, I for sure
seein' the signs'a yur efforts. Yes, sir, the ole Gardner workin' the
fields at Flight Options. The harvest—it be comin'.

Yur true friend,
THE OLE GARDNER.

--
ARE YOU A HAPPY PILOT?
HAPPY PILOTS MAKE THE SYSTEM WORK BY BENDING THE RULES,
and
PILOTS CAN LET THE SYSTEM FAIL BY FOLLOWING THE RULES.
NO HEROES NEEDED, JUST DO YOUR JOB.
Y'ALL BE VERY CAREFUL OUT THERE!

 

[SilverSurfer]

Cull Yur Herd!

Howdy folks. It be me again, the ole Gardner. It takes strong folks
to survive the winter, specially when its been as bad 'round the country
as I been readin' 'bout in the local newspaper. I sure hopes those'a
y'all been out workin' in the cold 'n ice 'n snow been takin' extra
care to be warm 'n safe. Payin' close attention to 'em "Ts" I done wrote
y'all 'bout 'n those wintertime DYKs yur Union done posted on its
website, be a good way for y'all to brave the elements without gettin'
yourself in a heap'a trouble or hurt none.
But I been told by my pilot friend what lives round these parts there
be too many flyers at yur outfit not doin' their part to bring in the
harvest. They afraid to join the Union; or if'n they did join, some
afraid to let the bosses know they done it; or they afraid to do their job
the way the Sheriff says they must; 'n some not wantin' to write-up
broke parts in the 501 page book when 'n where they finds 'em broke. I
hear tell some pilots ain't joinin' the Union 'cause they ain't wantin'
to pay dues—not 'cause they can't afford it none, but 'cause they just
don't wanna. Some'a these free-loaders be sayin' they only gonna pay up
once the Union gets 'em a contract, 'cause that's what they was told
when the Union first come 'round. That kind'a story be a big pile of
smelly, rottin' horse manure like the muck I got out back the barn, if'n
y'asks me.
I think it be time the ole Gardner took the gloves off 'n tells it like
it is. I told y'all when I first started writin' that I done already
helped lots'a flyers at the big airlines bring in their own bountiful
harvest from time to time o'er many'a year. So, I be pretty good at
judgin' pilot "horseflesh." I seen selfish 'n scared pilots lurkin' in
the shadows at some'a these other outfits just like be slinkin' 'round
'mongst y'all. When in pubic or back home with the wife 'n kiddies, they
strut their stuff in their fancy uniforms pretendin' to be someone
special to be respected. But at work it be a different story.
They let others take the chances 'n do all the hard work that gonna
bring in the harvest. They try to be invisible. But, at the slightest
kind'a trouble, they cower in the corner like the mangy dogs they be.
They doesn't want to be associated with a Union, unless they gets their
butts in some kind'a trouble with the bosses 'n needs the Stewards to
help 'em out. I hear tell a few 'em slackers already done come runnin'
for help with their tails tucked between their legs. If'n y'ask me,
folks like this sure ain't fit for membership in the brotherhood'a airmen
what was built with the blood 'n guts 'n lives'a those brave pioneer
aviators what came 'afore 'em.
Now, I hear tell there was some talk when the Union first come 'round
that no dues need be paid till there be a contract. But, my pilot
friend says a few months later there be a vote 'mongst ALL the pilots 'bout
changin' the Union's By-Laws so dues be paid even 'afore there be a
contract. He says lots more Flight Options pilots voted for this change
than were again' it, as did yur Brothers 'n Sisters at that there
NetJets outfit. That be the right 'n democratic way to make changes—by a
fair vote—not the way yur big bosses do by just sayin' pilots gots nothin'
to say 'bout changes they always makin' at yur outfit.
I been told the bosses didn't let y'vote on the changes to yur health
care insurance costs 'n benefits, 'n y'didn't get to vote on the
vacation mess 'round Thanksgivin' time, 'n the bosses ain't lettin' y'vote
'bout who be drivin' that there new "X" machine they be takin' on. When
yur Union done gets y'all a contract, y'gonna get to vote on all these
kind'a changes 'afore they happen. The bosses ain't gonna be makin' no
such changes without yur Union first sayin' it be OK. But, right now
y'ain't got that there contract 'n negotiatin' to get it costs yur Union
lots'a money, which comes from dues.
My pilot friend 'n I was readin' bout some words in the big dictionary
down at the town library 'n we looked up the word "scab." Now, I knows
most'a y'already knows a "scab" be someone what crosses a Union's
picket line 'n snatches food off'n strikin' workers' tables. They be
modern day Benedict Arnolds 'n should be shunned for the traitors they be.
Folks 'round these parts where I lives runs that kind outta town on a
rail fast as can be when they comes driftin' by. What y'all probably
doesn't know is the dictionary says a "scab" also be a worker what
refuses to join the Union all the while takin' 'vantage'a the good the Union
be doin'.
Most'a those pilots at yur outfit what ain't yet joined the Union
probably ain't never gonna 'n ain't never gonna pay the fair share they
owes, even after yur Union gets that contract. Some might, but most surely
won't. Just figure how much money they already owes the Union since
dues got voted in. That be a mighty big check they needin' to write to
join up 'n it keeps gettin' bigger with each passin' month. Sayin'
they standin' on what they was told 'bout dues at the start, even though
there was a rightful vote to change it, be their selfish excuse for not
payin' their fair share to help y'all get that contract.
I been told some flyers gots worries back home 'n just can't afford to
pay dues, no matter how small an amount it be each month, cause they
bein' paid such small wages by yur mean bosses 'n need every nickle to
pay their bills 'n feed their families. My pilot friend says this be
'specially true 'mongst co-pilots what drives that there BeechNut jet. He
says there be a few captains in the same boat. The good news is most
BeechNut jet drivers be payin'—even those what can't afford it—'n many
non-payers be helpin' bring in the harvest in other ways, like
followin' the list'a "Ts." That be a good thing, for sure.
But, my friend says too many pilots whats drivin' the bigger planes yur
outfit gots 'n gettin' paid higher wages be the worst slackers when it
comes to not payin' dues 'n they ain't helpin' out none in other ways,
neither. They gots no excuse for not payin' their fair share but
selfish greed, don't y'know. Yur Union gots to have dues money to operate
'n pay for negotiations, but they doesn't care. They just sittin' back
waitin' for y'all to bring in the harvest, then they wantin' to take
part in the fruits'a yur labors for free.
I hear tell there be a few pilots wearin' yur Union's pin what ain't
really members. My pilot friend says some'a these pin-wearin' fakers
done "bought" their pins by payin' dues for only the first month or two
after the Union come 'round. Then they quits payin' but keeps on
pretendin' they be members by still wearin' the pin like a cheap disguise.
They wants y'to think they somethin' they ain't. I been told some'a
these dishonest folks be "double agents" workin' secretly with yur mean
bosses tryin' to get rid'a yur Union. My pilot friend says when he sees
flyers he doesn't know wearin' the pin, he asks 'em if'n they be members
with dues paid full up. He says when he finds a scab wearin' a pin
what shouldn't, he lets other pilots know who the traitor be 'n lets the
Union know, too.
If'n y'be workin' with a crewmate what be a coward or a scab 'n he not
doin' what y'knows be right to help bring in the harvest, there be a
simple solution. I been told it takes two pilots to drive one'a 'em
little jets yur outfit's got. So, if'n yur crewmate too scared or greedy
or dishonorable to do what's right 'n safe 'n legal, it be yur job to
stop it by sayin' y'ain't gonna help him do wrong or break no rules or
take no chances. Sort'a reminds me 'bout that old sayin' "it takes two
to Tango!"
My pilot friend says he lets weak crewmates know he be callin' the
Union's Pro Stan Committee or writin' to ASAP 'bout what he thinks they be
doin' wrong. But, if'n what they doin' be really bad 'n might get his
ownself hurt or in trouble with the law, he lets 'em know he be tellin'
the bosses he ain't goin' flyin' with 'em none. He says he for sure
doesn't want to be no rat, but he gots to protect his ownself from harm
when there be no other choices left. I agrees with him. Eventually,
the traitors 'mongst y'all be gettin' the message the rest'a y'ain't no
longer puttin' up with folks what be puttin' y'at risk.
Now, I knows what I talkin' 'bout be kind'a harsh. But, the time has
come to cull yur herd. The big bosses dependin' on the cowards 'n scabs
'mongst y'all to help 'em out by breakin' rules 'n doin' what they
want, even if'n it be wrong or unsafe. That be workin' again' the rest'a
y'all what's doin' things right 'n followin' the rules 'n stayin' as
safe as possible. The big bosses playin' the waitin' game 'spectin' the
rest'a y'get tired'a the fight 'n abandon yur Union's efforts. Then
they come stompin' down on yur heads, big time, like I seen 'afore at
other airlines where the Union done give up.
It be time to pick sides 'n let the traitors 'mongst y'all know y'ain't
gonna take kindly to 'em workin' again' y'no more. If'n a pilot ain't
now payin' dues to yur Union 'cause he just doesn't wanna, he ain't
with ya. If'n he ain't with ya, he be again' ya. It be just that
simple. Like I says 'afore, y'shouldn't be sittin' a meal or drinkin'
spirits with these kind'a folks, none, neither. They ain't yur friends, even
though y'might'a once thunk different 'bout 'em.
Well, sir, it be February 'n winter almost half-done. Valentine's day
be right 'round the corner. I beginnin' to get a bad case'a cabin
fever 'n can't wait to start up my trusty tractor 'n get to plowin' the
fields for spring plantin'. I just knows when I looks 'round that the
strong 'n brave folks 'mongst y'all gonna be right there with me workin'
the fields at Flight Options. Y'followin' 'em "Ts" close as can be so's
y'be stayin' healthy 'n legal 'n safe. Yes, sir, the signs be gettin'
unmistakable with each passin' week. The harvest—it be comin'.
Yur true friend,
THE OLE GARDNER.