Most embarassing moment

[atrdriver]

First day of a 3 day trip, climbing into the cargo compartment on an ATR, my foot slips and my right hip pocket catches on the latch as I go down. Needless to say, the latch won the battle, and rips my pants from the waist to the knee on the right side. In front of all the passengers looking out the windows on C concourse in ATL. Walked back to the terminal holding them together, finished the trip with duct tape holding them together.

 

[EatSleepFly]

Anyone walk into the wing on a cessna?

I'd have to be about 9 feet tall to walk into the wing on the Cessna I fly.

 

[DC4boy]

We got a reposition dispatch. Captain was in the sh!tter, told me to go get it (dc-4) started. First time starting by myself. Everyone watching. Hit the start switch, primer, mags, like I knew what I was doing. Then, BANG. The loudest backfire you've ever heard. Tried to start again, BANG. Sevral more attempts to no avail lead me to re-think my proceedure. **CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED****CENSORED** fuel valve was off. I was embarassed for a week...

 

[AbOvo]

We were doing an empty leg in the Brasilia and I was the FO. The FA was in the back of the aircraft cleaning up when we finished our paperwork so I figured I'd be nice and close the door for her. I'm standing there holding the button as the door comes up (thinking, man I'm a nice guy), unfortunately not realizing my head sticks up higher than the stopping point of the door.

The door, which moves rather quickly, slams down on my head knocking me into the lav. Little tweety birds and stars were all I could see after that one. Luckily there were only two witnesses to that one...They both got a good laugh after checking to see if I was OK.

 

[TurboS7]

I was at OTP flying Marines from OTP back home. The plane had just come in from KWI and I was going to take it to BGR. The cargo net in the rear bay hadn't gotten fastened properly so all the bags had slid to the back. I jumped up in the cargo bay as was pulling the rucksacks out. All of the sudden the one I was pulling on broke loose and I was airborne. It is about an eight foot fall and I thought about a lot of things as I fell. I managed to spin around and use the rucksack to break my fall. After the fall I opened my eyes to 6 Marines looking at me, they said, man that was ugly. The medic checked me out and said I was at least 50% and he'd fly home with me. So away we went. Maybe I should have gone to the Hospital at Bucharest, all those beautiful nurses....sorry, that was another dream.

 

[El Cóndor]

Re: Big Mess

I might have put it all over the plane rather than my shirt, just take a hose to the plane and it will be good as new, but either way that just sucks. I have never had that problem but I always carry a few sick sacks in my flight bag in case passengers get sick.

Really should have said all over THE INSIDE of the airplane. Everyone says that no matter how far you stick your head out the window, it is still coming back because of the wind stream and the difference in cabin/outside air pressure.

After that, I don't leave home without them sick sacks either. A passenger, student, or maybe me (again) may need it someday.

 

[Bryan D]

"Most embarassing moment"

I farted real loud at Arby's one time. It was a total surprise to me. The sound resonated off of the fiberglass seat. A group of eight people laughed uncontrollably. My face was so red it felt like it was on fire.
I sneezed once and snot flew out of my nose and just hung there. I had nothing to wipe my nose with and people stared.
Then there was that time I went in the girls bathroom by mistake. Just about the time I began to take a leak a waitress walked in.

 

[VNugget]

Making taxi calls on guard. Once was on my second or third flight lesson, and once was... just the other day. Gah...

 

[Cardinal]

Everyone says that no matter how far you stick your head out the window, it is still coming back because of the wind stream and the difference in cabin/outside air pressure.

This man speaks the truth. Been there, done that, picked the puke out of my hair. I had a brand new CFI certificate in my pocket, and another CFI was flying the airplane. After about an hour tossing around in the summer bumps, I tried to let fly out the window, and he, I, and the airplane all got to wear the vomit for the next hour to the destination. Somehow "I'm sorry" just doesn't cut it.

 

[check6]

For some reason, mine all occurred before even getting into the air. . .

1. Starting to taxi when our forward momentum suddenly stopped(tail tiedown).

2. Starting to taxi with the nose cowl door open.

3. Walking head first into a flap during preflight.

4. Taxing all the way out to the end of the runway with the baggage door open on the C-172. Our company aircraft(doing their run-up next to us) politely made us aware of our situation.

 

[Almerick07]

Hit a golfer that was one hole ahead of me....should have used a 3 iron.

 

[Swede]

Too many to list. Most not suitable for this forum. One of the worst...

I was FO departing EWR after a layover. Something I ate the night before was grumbling and tumbling in my guts. The first gentle whispers of distress began during the start checklist. No problem, I'm thinking, I'm good for at least a couple hours yet. During engine start, I'm beginning to develop those strong "Gotta Go" crampy gripes.

As we taxi out (full AC), I reach a certain point of suffering. We've all been there. If I don't offload in the next 2 minutes, it's going to be an epic, vile disaster. I'm pale, and big beads of sweat are forming on my face.

"STOP the JET NOW, I'VE GOT TO HIT THE LAV, FAST!!!"

The captain is laughing his a$$ off as I leap out of the cockpit and fly into the lav. All of first class, and the FA's, are staring directly at my doubled-over, staggering form as I burst through the CP door. Are we on fire? Is there a terrorist? Is the Captain dead?

Now the worst happens, as if it's not already pretty bad. This is graphic. Don't read it if potty humour offends.

Keep in mind, all of this is unfolding on the parallel taxiway at EWR, with traffic backing up behind us, and ground asking if we need help.





OK. You've been warned.




At high pressure, the vile remains of last night are audibly ejected in the 1C lav toilet. Worse than the noise is the stench. One of those "once every 5 years" bit of toilet pollution that carries on the breeze like a squirt of VX nerve agent. The cabin is polluted to a degree that defies description, with the entire aircraft load staring at the unfolding drama in total, amazed silence. To this day, I cannot describe the utter, ultimate humiliation as I scooted back forward to my FO seat. It still makes me cringe.

 

[chperplt]

It still makes me cringe.

Makes you cringe but makes me laugh my ass off!!!!

Something about bathroom humor....

 

[empenage]

Whoa buddy! Swede, I feel the pain man...I feel the pain...

 

[icefr8dawg]

Anyone fly a Hawker? We've left the damm steering pin off a couple of times. After waiting for the "senior" line guy who knows how to put it back in with the engines runninng we get soluted by the entire ramp crew on the taxi out. It's happened a couple of times and each time it gets the same result.

Once broke the retractable step off the 310 while disembarking on an icy ramp in BUF. That hurt

 

[VNugget]

- Trying to taxi out with a chock still in, with a smoking hottie in the back.

- Trying to start with the mixture out, with my best flying friend in the back. (But the tables were turned when I had to take off his tiedown chains so he wouldn't have to shut down. Yeah I'm looking at you, TrafficInSight)

- Cessna Diamonds. I couldn't hit that wing harder if I'd tried to on purpose. I was in the process of standing up after tying my shoe, while starting to move toward the cockpit at the same time..... carrying maximum momentum.

 

[414Flyer]

This man speaks the truth. Been there, done that, picked the puke out of my hair. I had a brand new CFI certificate in my pocket, and another CFI was flying the airplane. After about an hour tossing around in the summer bumps, I tried to let fly out the window, and he, I, and the airplane all got to wear the vomit for the next hour to the destination. Somehow "I'm sorry" just doesn't cut it.

Happens that way on roller coasters too. I once covered everyone behind me in puke. I think I will forever have an image of this bald guy with glasses, and a fair amount of vomit on his glasses and head

 

[Sam Snead]

After an 0-dark-30 show, my FO pointed out that I was wearing 1 black shoe and 1 brown shoe. I had to hide in the cockpit all day! What a dork!

I had dressed wearily and in the dark.

After that I did a shoe-check if I left very early.

The FO told some of the other pilots and I got some static later but not much.

 

[m4j2t]

3rd day of ioe, 5th leg of the day, 30 minutes to make the turn--and the aircraft swap. post-flight, preflight, paperwork--got it all done, both of em spinning, "after start checklist complete" (reaching for my headset...which I left in the last aircraft...)

shutdown #1 run across the ramp with everybody watching (it was the evening rush) emerge from the other a/c with headset in hand and then had to stand there to hold the button to put the door back up :0... longest 8 seconds of my life. run back and listen to it on company...

 

[JimG]

In a hurry, told the (now) ex-wife and the kids to get the tie down chains as I was pre-flighting and packing bags.

Fired up and started out in a fast taxi....only to discover the left wing was still tied down, which meant a shut down, climb out over the ex, pull the wing down to take the slack out of the chain so she could unhook it.

She still brings it up occasionally that I'm a bad pilot b/c of that incident (which was her responsibility).