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"I'm a pilot"

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groundpointsix

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 28, 2003
Posts
372
Until last night, I never thought I would actually hear someone use this line. But wait, there's more.

I'm sitting in a bar last night with two girls and this guy comes up to us, mumbling and pointing to things. At first, I thought he was just talking his way through some rap lyric and dancing or something, but as I listened I realized that he was reading a checklist and giving the girls I was with a passenger briefing. He concludes it with "I'm a pilot."

Here's the rest of our conversation:

Me: Me too. What do you fly?
Him: Beech 1900Ds (He emphasized the "D")
Me: Oh really, who do you fly for? (Like I care)
Him: Continental Connection
Me: Commutair? (We're in Ohio, so I figured Commutair was a safe bet)
Him: No, actually I'm down south.
Me: Colgan? (OK, so I forgot they don't use the Beech on the Continental side of the house)
Him: Actually, I'm down in Florida. I fly for gulfstream.
Me: Oh. (How much did that cost you?)
Him: I know what you're thinking. All that PFT B.S. But it's great, I'm a permenent hire; I make $18 an hour and they're going to help me find a job with another airline.

At this point the girls are ignoring him completely. He went on for another 5-10 minutes about how great this was for his career and how he was turning down jobs with COEX and pinnacle. I didn't quite follow his logic.

Tool.
 
groundpointsix said:
I'm sitting in a bar last night with two girls and this guy comes up to us, mumbling and pointing to things.


I've never heard of such a thing. A mumbling fool at a bar? What kind of places are you hanging out at? :beer: Two girls? What would your mother say?
 
groundpointsix said:
...I'm sitting in a bar last night...and this guy comes up to us, mumbling and pointing to things...
The last guy that did that to me wound up on the ground looking up. Before he knew it, I was wielding his barstool over my head, telling him not to follow me outside. I apologized to the rest of the customers, told them what this man said and then set the stool down, warning this joker once again not to get up until I was long gone.

What was this guy's crime?

He told me he was a cop and that he wanted me to exit the bar with him, because he had some unanswered questions. I don't think he liked my answers.

Warning: You could do that in the 1980's...nowdays you gotta take it, because the government gets mad when you defend yourself.
 
FN FAL said:
The last guy that did that to me wound up on the ground looking up. Before he knew it, I was wielding his barstool over my head, telling him not to follow me outside. I apologized to the rest of the customers, told them what this man said and then set the stool down, warning this joker once again not to get up until I was long gone.

What was this guy's crime?

He told me he was a cop and that he wanted me to exit the bar with him, because he had some unanswered questions. I don't think he liked my answers.

Warning: You could do that in the 1980's...nowdays you gotta take it, because the government gets mad when you defend yourself.
lay off the power bars..
 
BoeingBaller said:
lay off the power bars..
His mistake was grabbing my arm...up untill then it was kind of funny watching him talk.

I came back to that place the next night...I guess Mr undercover cop went next door to the Holiday Inn hotel bar and then came back to "coaches corner" again after I left. According to the tavern manager, undercover cop dude was covered in mud and looked pretty beat up. I guess he tried the same routine on someone else.

I have to guess that the original poster of this thread knew the guy that was mumbling and pointing like an airline pilot or he would have asked the joker to move on.
 
MED said:
You're a pilot?
That's right, "Naval Aviator"
I met that chick at a skydiving boogie. Everybody was eating her crap like there was no tomorrow.

When the boogie was coming to a close, she told everybody she missed her flight and that if her brother couldn't meet her with a car at FT Dodge Iowa to pick her up and run her back to her home state, she was going to miss reporting for duty after her vacation. I offered to let her fly our plane back that night for round trip gas money and she refused the offer...probably because the radar was mounted on the front panel and not in the back seat.
 
groundpointsix said:
Until last night, I never thought I would actually hear someone use this line. But wait, there's more.

I'm sitting in a bar last night with two girls and this guy comes up to us, mumbling and pointing to things. At first, I thought he was just talking his way through some rap lyric and dancing or something, but as I listened I realized that he was reading a checklist and giving the girls I was with a passenger briefing. He concludes it with "I'm a pilot."

Here's the rest of our conversation:

Me: Me too. What do you fly?
Him: Beech 1900Ds (He emphasized the "D")
Me: Oh really, who do you fly for? (Like I care)
Him: Continental Connection
Me: Commutair? (We're in Ohio, so I figured Commutair was a safe bet)
Him: No, actually I'm down south.
Me: Colgan? (OK, so I forgot they don't use the Beech on the Continental side of the house)
Him: Actually, I'm down in Florida. I fly for gulfstream.
Me: Oh. (How much did that cost you?)
Him: I know what you're thinking. All that PFT B.S. But it's great, I'm a permenent hire; I make $18 an hour and they're going to help me find a job with another airline.

At this point the girls are ignoring him completely. He went on for another 5-10 minutes about how great this was for his career and how he was turning down jobs with COEX and pinnacle. I didn't quite follow his logic.

Tool.
I think you may have just met 350Driver:laugh: !
 
FN FAL said:
...probably because the radar was mounted on the front panel and not in the back seat.

ZING! Ouch... :D Always know your audience when you start bull$h!tting.TC
 
FN FAL said:
I met that chick at a skydiving boogie. Everybody was eating her crap like there was no tomorrow.

When the boogie was coming to a close, she told everybody she missed her flight and that if her brother couldn't meet her with a car at FT Dodge Iowa to pick her up and run her back to her home state, she was going to miss reporting for duty after her vacation. I offered to let her fly our plane back that night for round trip gas money and she refused the offer...probably because the radar was mounted on the front panel and not in the back seat.
On a similar note, I was watching some tv show a while back, I think it was broadcast network.. at any rate. It was about some gal who was a "Naval Aviator" in some A-6 derivative. At first I thought she was a pilot, but as I watched, I realized that everything in the show, dialog, narration, camera angles when filming her in and around the airplane, etc. were all carefully orchastrated to leave the impression that she was a pilot, and disguise the fact that she actuall was a B/N or ECM operator or whatever hte rightseater did in that mission. They never actually *lied* and said she was a pilot, but they pretty much did everything but. Now, I mean absolutely no disrespect RIOs, B/N's ECM operators, or other non-pilot crewmembers. I'm not going to look down my nose at others doing a job I've never done, and possibly couldn't hack. In my mind, there's nothing dishonorable about that job at all, but *why* go to all the trouble to give the false impression that she's a pilot when in fact she's not?
 
Eaglepuke said:
If you just forked over tens of thousands for a pretend job, you would convince youself it was a great deal to.

Daddy probably bought him the job and now he can be a model in the ads in Flying Magazine. One guy is in like 3 ads
 
I flew the EA-6B for a number of years and can tell you some Electronic Countermeasure Officers (ECMO'S) are awesome, are very good at there job, and can do things with electronic jamming that I could never comprehend. However, I have had one or two meet a girl in a bar and tell them they were a pilot. I never wanted to start anything with these guys because they outnembered me 3 to 1, but it did piss me off and would cause tension. I was not qualified to do their job and they were not qualified to do mine. Some did get the chance to go through pilot training and I thinks that's great, but until that time they should not disrespect us that already did.
On the flip side to this any pilot that does not see ECMO's as an absolutly vital part of the crew and respect them in every way possible is an A$$ and should be taken out for a blanket party.
Naval Aviators have one anchor on their wings and Naval Flight Officers (NFO's), which ECMO's are a part of, have crossed anchors.
 
Bjammin said:
Naval Aviators have one anchor on their wings and Naval Flight Officers (NFO's), which ECMO's are a part of, have crossed anchors.
OK, help me out here, becaus I may be misunderstanding, does the term "Naval Aviator" mean only pilot rated crewmwmbers? ie: an ECMO would not correctly be referred to as a "Naval Aviator" ?

If so, the program did flat lie, as they referred to her as a "naval Aviator" I recall that clearly. I also recall very clearly footage of her mounting up for a mission and even though the the camera was very tight, it couldn't conceal the fact that she was strapping into the right seat. There aren't any A-6 variants which have pilot controls in the right seat are there? ( I think I know the answer to that, but I'm just checking)
 
A Squared said:
OK, help me out here, becaus I may be misunderstanding, does the term "Naval Aviator" mean only pilot rated crewmwmbers? ie: an ECMO would not correctly be referred to as a "Naval Aviator" ?


I don't think you're misunderstanding. RIO's and ECMO's are Naval Flight Officers (NFO's). Naval Aviators are pilots.
 
Guys,

Lighten up already. We're talking about guys in a bar trying to get laid--who cares what lines they are using, as long as they aren't using them on your sister. Surely you wouldn't let yourself be c@ck-blocked by some one else using the "pilot" line.

Or is everyone just mad because the marines already came and left with the good looking girls? :) (ducks)
 

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