This should give us all some hope. It is a reply I recieved when I sent out the original post to some of my non-airline friends. It reminds me that not every piece of cabin balast is the one we talk about. There are a few who respect us and the traditions we wish we still lived by.
I can add a few:
PASSENGERS
1) It didn’t fit overhead the last time. It still doesn’t fit. It will never fit. Get a smaller bag or, and I know this is CRAZY, check it.
2) The privilege of having a fellow person sitting on only one side of you comes with a price. That price? You get to use one armrest. The poor sap sitting bitch in between the two cast members from “The Biggest Loser”? He gets both of his. Common courtesy, even if he *was* too stupid to pick a better seat when he booked/checked in. And if you’re sitting on the aisle, stay the hell out of the way of the FAs – your tasseled penny loafers included.
3) Getting to the aisle at warp speed the moment the aircraft shares the same zipcode with the jetway does NOT entitle you to get off ahead of your fellow passengers. You wait for the rows ahead of you, then you can go. And guys, how hard is it to remember ladies first?
4) “Inside voice” rules still apply – even if you’re on your cell and you’re in the terminal. For pete’s sake, the 90-year old deaf woman three gates down can hear you. Keep it under 80 decibels.
5) And speaking of cell phones, resist the temptation to notify your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/relative/co-worker that you’ve arrived THE MOMENT the plane has landed. Wait that extra 90 seconds until you’re in the terminal. I want to get out, get to my car, and go along my way. I don’t want to hear what you need Bob in accounting to do for you next week while you’re standing with your ass in my face. And speaking of asses…
6) Farting on the plane. Not cool. Not cool at all. I’m talking to you, too, ladies, with your little silent “no one will notice” ones. It’s a confined goddanged space. We all notice, every time.