AF vs. Navy

[NoahWerka]

Stolen from Bob Norris. Could be Chuck's brother. Bob is a retired Naval Aviator who has written several novels.


12 Feb 04

Young Man,

Congratulations on your selection to both the Naval and Air Force Academies. Your goal of becoming a fighter pilot is impressive and a fine way to serve your country. As you requested, I'd be happy to share some insight into which service would be the best choice. Each service has a distinctly different culture. You need to ask yourself "Which one am I more likely to thrive in?"

USAF Snapshot: The USAF is exceptionally well organized and well run. Their training programs are terrific. All pilots are groomed to meet high standards for knowledge and professionalism. Their aircraft are top-notch and extremely well maintained. Their facilities are excellent. Their enlisted personnel are the brightest and the best trained. The USAF is homogenous and macro. No matter where you go, you'll know what to expect, what is expected of you, and you'll be given the training & tools you need to meet those expectations. You will never be put in a situation over your head. Over a 20-year career, you will be home for most important family events. Your Mom would want you to be an Air Force pilot ... so would your wife. Your Dad would want your sister to marry one.

Navy Snapshot: Naval Aviators are part of the Navy, but so are Black shoes (surface warfare) and bubble heads (submariners). Furthermore, the Navy is split into two distinctly different Fleets (West and East Coast). The Navy is heterogeneous and micro. Your squadron is your home; it may be great, average, or awful. A squadron can go from one extreme to the other before you know it. You will spend months preparing for cruise and months on cruise. The quality of the aircraft varies directly with the availability of parts. Senior Navy enlisted are salt of the earth; you'll be proud if you earn their respect. Junior enlisted vary from terrific to the troubled kid the judge made join the service. You will be given the opportunity to lead these people during your career; you will be humbled and get your hands dirty. The quality of your training will vary and sometimes you will be over your head. You will miss many important family events. There will be long stretches of tedious duty aboard ship. You will fly in very bad weather and/or at night and you will be scared many times. You will fly with legends in the Navy and they will kick your ass until you become a lethal force. And some days - when the scheduling Gods have smiled upon you - your jet will catapult into a glorious morning over a far-away sea and you will be drop-jawed that someone would pay you to do it. The hottest girls in the bar want to meet Naval Aviators. That bar is in Singapore.

Bottom line, son, if you gotta ask ... pack warm & good luck in Colorado.

Banzai

PS Air Force pilots wear scarves and iron their flight suits.

 

[VaB]

and Air Force guys are gay.

 

[tomgoodman]

Crossfield's retort

A couple of years ago, I tried to tease the late Scott Crossfield by sending him Norris's letter. The former Naval Aviator fired back:

"Air Force pilots wear scarves and iron their flight suits."

Tom,
That's NOT what Air Force pilots did in their flight suits!

 

[Scrapdog]

and Air Force guys are gay.

Wow - that is funny coming from a guy that spends 6 months on a bo-at with a bunch of dudes in close quarters! When I go TDY for 2-3 weeks at Nellis I see a bunch of gorgeous women dancing on the bar at Coyote Ugly in NY, NY or up on the Voodoo Louge in the Rio. When VaB goes TDY for 6 months on a bo-at he gets to hot bunk with young male sailors.

When I fly a mission, it's nice to devote most of my brain bytes to the actual tactical execution, not crapping my pants about landing on the bo-at as soon as my gear is in the well on T/O. Is your guys landing on the bo-at impressive...yes indeed. Will I take my 10K piece of concrete, be able to focus on mission execution a lot more of the time, and have nice golf courses at my bases instead of spending 6 months on the bo-at with 1000 other dudes - you bet, every time.

I got into both Academies as well - I sure am glad I spent 4 years at 7250 MSL at a nice cozy place just south of Denver instead of wearing a dixie cup.

Disclaimer - this is fun kidding with my Navy brethren (aside from Dave Griffin who is a complete tool). All in all, you guys do a great job! :beer:

 

[VaB]

Wow - that is funny coming from a guy that spends 6 months on a bo-at with a bunch of dudes in close quarters! When I go TDY for 2-3 weeks at Nellis I see a bunch of gorgeous women dancing on the bar at Coyote Ugly in NY, NY or up on the Voodoo Louge in the Rio. When VaB goes TDY for 6 months on a bo-at he gets to hot bunk with young male sailors.

When I fly a mission, it's nice to devote most of my brain bytes to the actual tactical execution, not crapping my pants about landing on the bo-at as soon as my gear is in the well on T/O. Is your guys landing on the bo-at impressive...yes indeed. Will I take my 10K piece of concrete, be able to focus on mission execution a lot more of the time, and have nice golf courses at my bases instead of spending 6 months on the bo-at with 1000 other dudes - you bet, every time.

I got into both Academies as well - I sure am glad I spent 4 years at 7250 MSL at a nice cozy place just south of Denver instead of wearing a dixie cup.

Disclaimer - this is fun kidding with my Navy brethren (aside from Dave Griffin who is a complete tool). All in all, you guys do a great job! :beer:

Oh yeah? I got 2 words for you:


a$$ and COT



:laugh:

 

[stonewall]

Oh yeah? I got 2 words for you:


a$$ and COT



:laugh:

I'm supposed to be wearing a scarf? F***, guess I betta get to the store. Nobody tells me anything, anymore. Guess that's what I get for being a Guardsmen with an F-22 slot. Damn USAFA...done nothing but get me good gigs my entire short life.:beer:

 

[F18-FDX]

USAFA...done nothing but get me good gigs my entire short life.:beer:

USNA...done nothing but get me good gigs my entire medium-length life. What do you know...we do have something in common :beer:

 

[Medivacer]

You don't have to tell the chicks at the bar you are a pilot, when your a Marine.

smily thingy

 

[ExAF]

You don't have to tell the chicks at the bar you are a pilot, when your a Marine.

smily thingy

That's right...the haircut gives you away every time. Reminds me of one Red Flag when our whole squadron got buzz cuts, grew mustaches and wore camouflaged Converse high tops upon arrival. Every time anyone came into the room, they did a double take and left. They'd return a few seconds later looking confused and saying I thought you guys were the Marines. Our reply...We're much better looking than the Marines. Came in handy when confronted for "trouble-making" too. They would ask "Who are you guys and what is your unit?" Our reply..."We are the Marines." We'd egress the area and the Marines would be left holding the bag the next day. Oh those were the days! Took my hair a couple of months to recuperate though.

 

[VaB]

You don't have to tell the chicks at the bar you are a pilot, when your a Marine.

smily thingy

Ya don't ask a guy if he's a Naval Aviator. If he is, he'll tell you. If he's not, you'll embarrass him.

double smily thing

 

[DaveGriffin]

Wow - that is funny coming from a guy that spends 6 months on a bo-at with a bunch of dudes in close quarters! When I go TDY for 2-3 weeks at Nellis I see a bunch of gorgeous women dancing on the bar at Coyote Ugly in NY, NY or up on the Voodoo Louge in the Rio. When VaB goes TDY for 6 months on a bo-at he gets to hot bunk with young male sailors.

When I fly a mission, it's nice to devote most of my brain bytes to the actual tactical execution, not crapping my pants about landing on the bo-at as soon as my gear is in the well on T/O. Is your guys landing on the bo-at impressive...yes indeed. Will I take my 10K piece of concrete, be able to focus on mission execution a lot more of the time, and have nice golf courses at my bases instead of spending 6 months on the bo-at with 1000 other dudes - you bet, every time.

I got into both Academies as well - I sure am glad I spent 4 years at 7250 MSL at a nice cozy place just south of Denver instead of wearing a dixie cup.

Disclaimer - this is fun kidding with my Navy brethren (aside from Dave Griffin who is a complete tool). All in all, you guys do a great job! :beer:

I think you would have looked really cute in a dixie cup Scapdog.

Riding the boat and separation from family is the price Navy guys willingly pay to get close to the fight fast and kill bad guys, hours before the AF rolls out of bed at 0645.

You can spin it any way you want, but the truth of the matter is that the personal comforts that pampered AF prima donnas prize so much (and wastes potential A-10 dollars on) just aren't as important to dudes really focused on the mission.

Go NAVY, beat Boston College in the Meineke Car Care Bowl, 30 Dec.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year everyone.

 

[Purpled]

Ya don't ask a guy if he's a Naval Aviator. If he is, he'll tell you. If he's not, you'll embarrass him.

double smily thing

And when a girl in a bar asks the AF guy what he flies, he says, "I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill myself."

 

[DaveGriffin]

Wow - that is funny coming from a guy that spends 6 months on a bo-at with a bunch of dudes in close quarters! When I go TDY for 2-3 weeks at Nellis I see a bunch of gorgeous women dancing on the bar at Coyote Ugly in NY, NY or up on the Voodoo Louge in the Rio. When VaB goes TDY for 6 months on a bo-at he gets to hot bunk with young male sailors.

When I fly a mission, it's nice to devote most of my brain bytes to the actual tactical execution, not crapping my pants about landing on the bo-at as soon as my gear is in the well on T/O. Is your guys landing on the bo-at impressive...yes indeed. Will I take my 10K piece of concrete, be able to focus on mission execution a lot more of the time, and have nice golf courses at my bases instead of spending 6 months on the bo-at with 1000 other dudes - you bet, every time.

I got into both Academies as well - I sure am glad I spent 4 years at 7250 MSL at a nice cozy place just south of Denver instead of wearing a dixie cup.

Disclaimer - this is fun kidding with my Navy brethren (aside from Dave Griffin who is a complete tool). All in all, you guys do a great job! :beer:

Scrapdog,

The AF fighter pukes’ fear of spending time on a boat is just too transparent. If we disregard your abject fear of night carrier landings, the second biggest obstacle for an AF guy to deal with on the boat is the fear of making an unwelcomed homo pass at shipmates. Captain’s Mast would be no fun for you. Neither would getting thrown off the fantail at 0300 by offended sailors.


The personal comfort deprivation while at sea, combined with a sense of social abandonment, magnified by fewer drunken females with low self-esteem than you are accustomed to, would undoubtedly push you over the edge, causing you to surrender to your inner demons and the unspeakable desires you have kept repressed since childhood. You would disgrace the Zoomies, your branch and your airplane community. It’s really good you didn’t go Navy.


I don’t think you need to worry though. The only way you could have actually served on a CVN as a fixed wing pilot, if you had been fortunate enough to graduate from the USNA and then get orders to Pensacola, would be as a P-3 pilot on a disassociated sea tour. They only get laid on shore leave if the hookers (male and female) are having a slow night.
:0

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all.
:beer:

 

[airgator]

Plus if you go Navy you get to wear a nametag on your ass. Now that's hot!

And who the hell irons their flightsuit?

 

[Scrapdog]

Scrapdog,

The AF fighter pukes’ fear of spending time on a boat is just too transparent. If we disregard your abject fear of night carrier landings, the second biggest obstacle for an AF guy to deal with on the boat is the fear of making an unwelcomed homo pass at shipmates. Captain’s Mast would be no fun for you. Neither would getting thrown off the fantail at 0300 by offended sailors.


The personal comfort deprivation while at sea, combined with a sense of social abandonment, magnified by fewer drunken females with low self-esteem than you are accustomed to, would undoubtedly push you over the edge, causing you to surrender to your inner demons and the unspeakable desires you have kept repressed since childhood. You would disgrace the Zoomies, your branch and your airplane community. It’s really good you didn’t go Navy.


I don’t think you need to worry though. The only way you could have actually served on a CVN as a fixed wing pilot, if you had been fortunate enough to graduate from the USNA and then get orders to Pensacola, would be as a P-3 pilot on a disassociated sea tour. They only get laid on shore leave if the hookers (male and female) are having a slow night.
:0

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all.
:beer:

And fellas - as I mentioned in my earlier post...this guy is a complete and utter tool. He had to go out of his way to write 2 ridiculous posts to me on a lighthearted subject. I guess proof is in the pudding. Well at least we don't have to claim him as an AF guy...Navy flyers, I'm sorry guys. There's always one in the bunch that just doesn't get it huh? :crying:

 

[VaB]

Yeah, next time someone starts a fun thread, don't tell Griffin where it is. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.

 

[Oh-ryan]

Scrapdog,

The AF fighter pukes’ fear of spending time on a boat is just too transparent. If we disregard your abject fear of night carrier landings, the second biggest obstacle for an AF guy to deal with on the boat is the fear of making an unwelcomed homo pass at shipmates. Captain’s Mast would be no fun for you. Neither would getting thrown off the fantail at 0300 by offended sailors.


The personal comfort deprivation while at sea, combined with a sense of social abandonment, magnified by fewer drunken females with low self-esteem than you are accustomed to, would undoubtedly push you over the edge, causing you to surrender to your inner demons and the unspeakable desires you have kept repressed since childhood. You would disgrace the Zoomies, your branch and your airplane community. It’s really good you didn’t go Navy.


I don’t think you need to worry though. The only way you could have actually served on a CVN as a fixed wing pilot, if you had been fortunate enough to graduate from the USNA and then get orders to Pensacola, would be as a P-3 pilot on a disassociated sea tour. They only get laid on shore leave if the hookers (male and female) are having a slow night.
:0

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all.
:beer:

Hey Dave,
Never had a problem getting in to see your mother no matter what night it was. Your father however, always seem to have quite the lineup in front of his door... not that there is anything wrong with that (mostly from the Zoomies in town). He had a nice collection of ascots nailed to his wall.

Yup, the P-3 is a POS, but they are fun to fly... what did you fly again?

A Joyous Festivous to the rest of us!!!

 

[ExAF]

Still

And yet you guys keep quoting him thus exposing us to his idiotic drivel when he is on most ignore lists. Have a heart and quit quoting him....PLEASE

 

[pilotyip]

If you made it to either club, you have been given a fantastic adventure. I believe few of those who went down either path would change change much.

 

[guppygoshawk]

...Navy flyers, I'm sorry guys. There's always one in the bunch that just doesn't get it huh? :crying:

Hopefully, he'll never be in the 'bunch'. What a tool. If he's actually using his real name, he's beyond screwed anyway.