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You may be a redneck pilot, if...

Welcome to Flightinfo.com

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ceo_of_the_sofa

Registered User
Joined
Sep 25, 2002
Posts
618
1. Your stall warning plays DIXIE

2. Your cross country flight plan uses flea markets as check points

3. You think sectionals should show trailer parks

4. You've ever used moonshine as AvGas

5. Your 172's wheel pants have mud flaps with a reclining nude

6. Your toothpick keeps poking your mike

7. You've ever taxied around the airport just drinking beer

8. You wouldn't be caught dead in a Grumman Yankee

9. You use an old Purina Dog Chow sack as a wind sock

10. You constantly confuse Beechcraft with Beechnut

11. You think GPS stands for GOING PERFECTLY STRAIGHT

12. You refer to formation flying as "We got us a convoy."

13. Your matched set of lightweight flying luggage is 3 grocery bags from Piggly Wiggly.

14. You have a gun rack in the rear window

15. You have more than one roll of duct tape holding your cowling on

16. You figure mud and manure in your weight and balance calculations

17. You siphon gas from your tractor to go flying

18. You've never landed at an actual airport even thought you been flying for over 20 years

19. You've ground looped after hitting a cow

20. You consider anything over 100 ft AGL as HIGH altitude flying

21. There are parts on your airplane labeled JOHN DEERE

22. You've never seen a real sectional, but own all the TEXACO road maps for your area

23. There's exhaust residue on the right side of your airplane and tobacco stains on the left

24. You have to buzz the strip to chase off the cows and sheep

25. You use your parachute for a portable hanger

26. You've landed on Main street for a cup of coffee

27. The tread pattern IF any, on all three of your tires is different

28. You have a pair of fuzzy dice hanging from the magnetic compass

29. You put hay in the back seat so your dogs don't get cold

30. You've got matching bumper stickers on each side of the vertical fin

31. There's grass stains on the tips of your propeller

32. Your hanger collapses and 4 of your best dogs are killed

33. Somewhere on your plane there's a bumper sticker that reads "I'd rather be fishin'"

34. You navigate with your ADF tuned to only AM country stations

35. You think an ultralight is a sissy new beer from BUDWEISER

36. Just before the crash, everybody on the UNICOM freq. heard you say, "Hey Y'all, watch this."
 

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