What's the dumbest question you've been asked as a pilot?

[Muppets]

The morning after the Comair crash I had a lady ask my FO if we were going to use the right runway.....passengers suck.

 

[Minimaniac]

When non-revving, I often get the " shouldn't you be up there flying?", to which I reply:" No, I'm kinda tired this morning, I think the F/O can handle it."

Flying an Aztec through the midwest (no radar) on night, controller states there are level 5 and 6 cells ahead, with hail greater than 2 inches, winds over 90 knots, and a confirmed tornado... do I want to continue on my planned route?!!!!!

FA asked me if I liked being an FO. "It's fine for now". She then asks me why I applied to be an FO... didn't I want to be a captain?

 

[RefugePilot]

Q: Aren't you young to be a pilot?
A: Yes, that's why I'm with the make-a-wish foundation. They're letting me fly this leg.

My favorite so far, I might try it if I ever have PAX.

"It should be cool we get to wear helmets don't we"
I was taking a friend flying for the first time in a C152. She is a little high strung and is prescribed Zanax to keep things level which she takes when she flys commercially.

I handed here a headset and said here's your helmet.

"You need to turn on your flash"
Advice from the person sitting next to someone taking a photo out of an airplane window at night.

 

[Razorback Flyer]

#1: While Walking through the terminal, a passenger looking for her flight to SFO stopped me and asked me "where is San Fransico" Very hard not to point over my shoulder and say "oh, 'bout 2000 miles that way." (She was actually very courteous, so I tried to a least help her find a custumer service agent, but she had unfornately missed the flight.)

#2: Had a passenger ask something about if he was getting a meal on his flight, or something of that nature. We were in a terminal with multiple airlines (where Champion, USA 3000, and various other charter types went out of,) so I asked which what airline he was flying on. He got irrated, and shouted "Well... I don't know!" I was at a loss for words.

 

[00Dog]

Near the Delta gates at SFO I had a lady ask me why they took out the Starbucks.

Had another lady on a St. Croix to St. Thomas flight ask me which lake we were over. I was truly shocked.

 

[COOPERVANE]

While waiting to check into hotel some guy walks up and hands me $5.00


"Hey bellman, can you get me a cab?"

 

[whaleroast]

While waiting to check into hotel some guy walks up and hands me $5.00


"Hey bellman, can you get me a cab?"

I saw this happen one time to a captain I was doing a trip with. Early morning, in uniform with the hats on waiting in the lobby for the van to take us to the airport, and some guy walked right up to him, dropped his bags at the captains feet and asked if he could pull the shuttle around to the front. He had a flight to catch, he said.

 

[Longhorn]

Hear at MSP over the announcement system.

"would the person leaving a hearing air at checkpoint 1 please return to claim your item"

I just started laughing and kept on walking.

 

[dingo222]

standing outside the terminal smoking one morning...... a dad and his little son walk up. Dad is impressing his kid with knowledge of airplanes and then see's me and says " see the three stripes on his jacket, see it, see it" pulls his son within 2 feet of me "he's a copilot, he talks on the radio and the captain teaches him to fly."

I wanted to put my cig out on dad's face and pull out my crank and say, i'm you father luke!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Poahi]

Where's my daughter?? (Okay, maybe is wasn't so dumb....)