Weird crew members

[Traumahawk]

Hey CitationMan......whats your son like to fly with?


T-hawk

 

[dispatchguy]

I was jumpseating on an HP A320 with an captain I hadnt yet flown with - and right before pushback, he dons one of those train engineer hats, grabs a wooden train whistle, and blows the whistle into the PA and announces "All Aboard!" over the PA.

EVERYONE in the back leans into the aisle in a uniform "what the he11" ??

He was a fun captain to jumpseat with.

Several years earlier I was jumpseating on a UAL B757 into ORD, and the captain starts a 30 minute spiel from the Top of Descent nearly continuously until sterile cockpit at 10 on how the F/O was going to complete the "kissing of the wheels to the runway" on 27L. F/O flew a manual raw-data approach, and I didnt even feel touchdown - I knew we landed when the speed brake handle moved rearwards.

My wife was in the back and she thought that it was a bit much.

 

[Typhoon1244]

I was jumpseating on an HP A320...

A Hewlett Packard A320?

 

[fLYbUDDY]

His first time in the jet is how i got my Avatar!

arahahrhahahrharh

you so siwwi starving cfi!

 

[FL240]

weird guys

I flew with a guy that looked just like Mr. Bean.

I also flew with a guy who used to say the same exact thing every single time he heard a female pilot check on....."Oh what a shame. Another empty kitchen." Then he would go off on a tangent about how that woman should be at home cooking and cleaning and pleasing the man. He had a very big......scratch that.......the biggest mustache you ever have seen. It used to drive me nuts because he would always have to have his morning bagels. When he ate them he refused to move his mic boom away from his mouth, so you got to enjoy the sound of his whiskers scratching/scraping the the mic. (Kinda like fingernails on a chalkboard) He had plenty of other annoying habits and sayings....many to vulgar for this board.

 

[Hawker rider]

OMG!!

I think I heard somebody mention something about me.

Oh well, i guess i'm weird

 

[outtolunch]

Flew with a capt. once who wore a brown leather wristband on his right wrist that had a fake eyeball "built" into it. So, everytime he put his hand on the power levers I had this eyeball staring at me.

I didn't even ask why.....was a little afraid of what the answer might be!

 

[ceo_of_the_sofa]

Flew with a capt. once who wore a brown leather wristband on his right wrist that had a fake eyeball "built" into it. So, everytime he put his hand on the power levers I had this eyeball staring at me.

I didn't even ask why.....was a little afraid of what the answer might be!

LOL, that's insane

 

[El Duderino]

s

 

[canadflyau]

he had a spare glass eye and you didn't even know it...

 

[e=mc2]

Lets not forget the Captain who thought that deodorant caused cancer and never used any. After one leg the FA and I came in with petroleum jelly across our nostrils to keep the stench at bay.

 

[avbug]

Silly flight attendant. Vicks works better.

 

[Wang Chung]

Satan's Squawk

There was a certain CA I flew with…

When I started flying with him, one of the first things he told me was that he would NEVER accept a squawk that included “666”.

One night we were in the cockpit and I was copying the clearance while he was doing some paperwork. The squawk was something like “6646.” He wasn’t really paying too much attention, but when he heard ATC give that squawk he clenched up and stopped what he was doing. When he heard me give the read-back he relaxed and went back to his paperwork.

 

[Wang Chung]

Maybe it's just me, but after reading thru all these posts it looks like the Captains have the best weirdisms.

I guess that upgrade causes some kind of short-circuit in the brain.

 

[WrightAvia]

Lets not forget the Captain who thought that deodorant caused cancer and never used any. After one leg the FA and I came in with petroleum jelly across our nostrils to keep the stench at bay.

What about all the captains that couldn't figure out how they got vaseline on their nads?

 

[CA1900]

When I finished up my initial training, I had to take an airplane checkride with one of our....ummm... stranger captains.

I knew the day was going to be rough when I saw how he showed up that Saturday morning: Jeans. Fleece Jacket. And his Captain's hat, which he didn't take off.

I came to find out that he also drove his car around town wearing his hat. Weird.... (and kind of sad)

 

[chperplt]

I flew with a strange captain when I was an FO.. He use to break out in tunes at any given time.. Barry Manilow some days and then switch over to top 40 crap at the snap of a finger....

hmmm.. come to think of it, now I'm the captain and I do the same thing.. Weird!!

 

[Be200pilot]

A captain I used to fly with, (thank god I dont anymore), used to smoke in the airplane on empty legs. He would use his urinal relief tube underneath his seat in the cockpit to blow out the smoke. He'd take a puff, then pull the valve open on the relief funnel and put his face right up to the thing and blow out!
It was very odd.

 

[Fly2Scuba]

Ok, I'm a 26 year old Single FO who flew a 4 day trip with a 40 year old FA. She kept on listing off her resume history to the Captain and I (to the point of bragging) on how she used to earn 6 figures working 80 hours aweek in the computer industry. She also went on and on about be able to do any auto maintenance, that she was a black belt in karate and could think herself warm for 60 minutes at a time in cold weather, and that she had gained 30 pounds of muscle in 3 months! Well, she certainly looked more on the chunky side than muscular on our trip; she used the fitness center the same time as I was on one of the overnights. Anyways she paid more attention to me during the trip and before my next trip a 3 page note on Holiday Inn stationary was in my V-file telling me how she hadn't been intimate for the last 4 years and was really interested in a romantic relationship with me. Yikes!! Hope she can turn it around one of these days.

 

[flyboydk]

Haha!

Fly2scuba, great story.... who else has hooked it up with a F/A?