I got this in an email last week and I think it is hillarious.
Planning a trip to Mexico!!
>
>Dear President Bush:
>
>I'm planning a trip to Mexico with my immediate family and all
>extended family, and I would like to ask you to assist me. We're
>going to walk across the border from the U.S. into Mexico, and I
>need
>to make a few arrangements. We're just skipping all the legal
>stuff
>like visas, passports, immigration quotas and laws, because I'm
>sure
>they handle those things the same way we do here. But would you
>mind
>telling your buddy, President Vicente Fox, that we're on our way?
>Please let him know that we'll be expecting the following:
>
>
>
>1. Free medical care for my entire family.
>
>2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all
>services
>we might need, whether we use them or not.
>
>3. All government forms need to be printed in English.
>
>4. We'll want our kids to be taught by English-speaking
>teachers.
>
>5. Schools need to include classes on American culture
>and
>history.
>
>6. We want our kids to see the American flag flying on
>the
>top of the flagpole at their school with the Mexican flag flying
>lower
>down.
>
>7. Plan to feed our kids a free breakfast and lunch at
>school.
>
>8. I will need a local Mexican driver's license so I can
>get
>easy access to government services.
>
>9. I don't plan to purchase car insurance, and I won't
>know,
>and don't plan to learn, any of their local traffic laws.
>
>10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get
>the
>memo from President Fox to leave us alone, please be sure that all
>their police officers speak English.
>
>11. I plan to fly the U.S. flag, put flag decals on my car,
>and
>have a gigantic family celebration on July 4th but we don't want
>any
>complaints or negative comments from the neighbors.
>
>12. I would also like to have a nice "temporary" job but I
>won't
>be paying any taxes, and don't expect their labor laws to apply to
>me.
>
>13. Please tell all the people in the country to be extremely
>nice and never say anything critical about me or my family, or
>about
>the strain we might be placing on their economy.
>
>
>
>I know this is an easy request because we do all these things for
>their folks who visit the U.S. I'm sure that President Fox won't
>mind
>returning the favor if you ask him nicely. However, if he gives
>you
>any trouble, just invite him to go quail hunting with the Vice
>President!

>
>
>
>Thanks, and have a nice day!
>
>
>
>Sincerely,
>
>
>
>Citizen of the United States of America
>