Two Pilot Marriages

[Standby 1]

All I am am advocating is one parent (mom or dad) stay at home with the kids. Shocking, I know, in our current culture... How dare I put kids before discretionary or second income, status jobs, and cultural identity.

I don't think there is anything wrong with what you are advocating. In our household, one parent is home with the kidlet. Most days that is me, but around 10 days each month I toddle off and work a daytrip and the person who stays with the kidlet on those days is his father. Wow...we must be AWFUL parents and I'm sure my child feels unloved and abandoned because one parent is with him at all times. I really should quit my flying job that gives me 20+ days off each month and get a 9-5 job and set up daycare for him. Gee...I was just going over my schedule for next month and realized it's worse than I thought ----- 26 days off (it's a vacation month for me) and 96 hrs of pay so I can afford to take the kidlet to visit Disneyworld. He's growing up miserable, isn't he?

 

[p.b.]

The arguments in this thread are so tedious!

A two pilot marriage isn't one where you can drop as many trips as you want or work a job with 10 day-trips a month. That's called a part time job.

For most of my career four 4days a month has been standard. If two pilots are working 15 to 16 days a month, either they will be away from home at the same time or they will never see one another.

It's nice to know there are still a few legacy jobs out there...I don't believe it's commonplace to have the flexibility you girls are commanding at your jobs. If I remember right, the person who started this thread was relatively low time, so I guess the advice to he or she would be to make sure you find a senior spouse so they can pick and choose their schedules.

 

[Standby 1]

The arguments in this thread are so tedious!

A two pilot marriage isn't one where you can drop as many trips as you want or work a job with 10 day-trips a month. That's called a part time job.

For most of my career four 4days a month has been standard. If two pilots are working 15 to 16 days a month, either they will be away from home at the same time or they will never see one another.

It's nice to know there are still a few legacy jobs out there...I don't believe it's commonplace to have the flexibility you girls are commanding at your jobs. If I remember right, the person who started this thread was relatively low time, so I guess the advice to he or she would be to make sure you find a senior spouse so they can pick and choose their schedules.

Actually, what is tedious is those people, who despite direct evidence to the contrary, continue to believe that a two pilot marriage with children (or not, take your pick) is not possible. I've referred a few of our married-pilot friends to this thread and we've all gotten a big laugh out of it since all of us are in long-term, two-pilot, with kids marriages and are living lives contrary to the descriptions of all these nay-sayers.

Now, as to legacy jobs....I just had to laugh at that one! I am a 2.5 year fo at a regional carrier who holds 18-21 days off each month WITHOUT dropping any trips (therefore, flying an average of 75 - 80 hrs each month). According to any airline out there, 75-80 hrs is considered full time. Now, my pay may seem part time-ish because it is, after all, a regional carrier, ha ha ha.

Is all this going to fall into a person's lap? Heck no. Sacrifices by both spouses are necessary. My latest sacrifice? I by-passed upgrade so that I could continue to keep the kind of schedule I have to spend time with my family. Doing that was a very big deal to me ---- everyone wants to upgrade, make more money, etc, etc. But it would have meant going back on reserve and my kid and husband are way, way, way more important to me than wearing 4 stripes.

 

[eddie]

I'm certainly not one to say that a two pilot marriage can't work, I've been in one for quite some time. I just don't believe it's in children's best interest to be raised by two parents that are out of town for 15 days each a month.

I'm glad to hear that there are great regional jobs out there. I never found that job.

 

[capt. megadeth]

I just don't believe it's in children's best interest to be raised by two parents that are out of town for 15 days each a month.

.

And the beauty in our life is that we all have our own beliefs. You have your beliefs and live by them and I have mine. The reason I don't have kids right now is because I am truly concerned with being around when I do have them. That means waiting until my fiancee and I have enough seniority so that at least one of us is around at all times. Maybe we won't see eachother alot in order to be with the kids, maybe it will work out that we will see eachother quite a bit as well. In either case, it is OUR choice and our love is strong enough to make that sacrifice for our future children. If you can't make that sacrifice then no, you should not have kids. I do believe it is good if at least one parent is around at all times but I also believe that it can be done with 2 pilot couples.

 

[eddie]

I guess everyone is in agreement then.

 

[FlyUnited]

Well, gee Beaver. Me and the hubby decided (even though we have finished raising our kids ) that it is more important for me to stay home just in case my kids decide to be parents so that I can stay home and build playdo sculptures with them. We decided that I have NO worth, so I should sacrifice for the betterment of others. It stinks that I am only 45 and have nothing left in my life except shopping and babysitting, but heck, it's 9/11/06....we need to think like the Arabs and put women in their place. Nuf said.

******Do any of the other 'girls' here know where I can purchase a head covering or a chastity belt?*********

 

[p.b.]

flyunited, I'm sad for you that you rate your worth by what job you hold.

I hope you weren't too offended by my terminology, that's just what I call myself and other females.

 

[FlyUnited]

No, not by the job I do but certainly not by doing something I find terribly boring (hanging around with kids) just so I will make other people happy.

As I stated before, some people really want to stay home and I believe that in a situation like that, the children will do exceptionally well. The problem lies when a person is forced to do something they do not want, something as important as raising a child, that can cause bad consequences.

Guys, my advice, if you want a stay home mom for your future children then only date the ladies who want that for themselves. It will make everyone involved much happier. As for me, I'd rather pull my fingernails off, one by one, than be a fulltime stayhome mom.

Well I'm off to Europe with my personal pilot/best friend for a funfilled layover (and no kids). See you soon.

 

[Rez O. Lewshun]

As I stated before, some people really want to stay home and I believe that in a situation like that, the children will do exceptionally well. The problem lies when a person is forced to do something they do not want, something as important as raising a child, that can cause bad consequences.

How about the kids that are forced to have a Mom that doesn't want them...

Parents choose thier kids but the kids don't choose thier parents...