The Lanyard Police

[VWDrvr21]

Amen.

I'm an equal opportunity hater...I hate conservatives and liberals equally, and both sects have this country completely FUBARed.

My mother use to tell me that there are two things you don't discuss outside your home, politics, and religion. I wish more people would take that to heart.

Be that as it may, I still will take any opportunity to piss on any liberal or conservative I come across, just to make their blood pressure go up, and of course, for my own sick amusment.

My wife (now ex) became a holy roller bible thumper. In the interest in maintaining some semblance of domestic harmony, I went along to her church with her, which was filled to the brim of self-rightous, intolerant science haters, among other things. I tend to wear my indifference and contempt on my sleeve, so I was greatly amused at their attempts to convert me.

At one point, I was cornered by a gaggle of the faithfull with my wife present, and it became quite obnoxious. So I simply said to the "leader" that Thor would not approve.

"Thor?" she asked. "Yes, Thor, God of Thunder. For you see, Thor is my personal God, and he has promised that if I die in glorious battle during Rangnorok, that I shall be permitted to cross the Rainbow Bridge into Asguard and earn the right to Valhalla".

Now, I don't know beans about Thor that I didn't read in his comic book. But the absolute confusion and abject horror in their face is a memory that I will treasure for the rest of my days. My ex looked like she wanted to crawl under the nearest rock.

A sweet moment indeed. If tormenting them is evil, then yes, I am evil.

Nu

No wonder your single. Look at what you wrote.I dont think your evil-your just a dork!

 

[Salukipilot4590]

No wonder your single. Look at what you wrote.I dont think your evil-your just a dork!

DORKS UNITE!!!

I thought it ruled! Totally something I would say given the chance!

 

[NuGuy]

No wonder your single. Look at what you wrote.I dont think your evil-your just a dork!

Hmmm, so says a person who has a stormtrooper for an avatar, and who's user name is VWDrvr...it might as well be "Sumrgrl" or "Stdlydude".

Careful about those stones you throw...

Nu

PS Your = possessive. You're = you are. If you're going to call someone out, do it right.

 

[Richard Gozinya]

Do you think any of the females could wear a pearl necklace lanyard?

That would be the bomb! Try explaining that one to that stuff shirt.

Dick

 

[Richard Gozinya]

I bet if it said "I LOVE SECULAR ATHIOCRACY" she wouldn't have said a thing, except maybe "Wow! Where'd you get that cool lanyard!".........who could possibly be ticked off by a Jesus lanyard. :beer:

Surely she would have asked you to go do shots if it said "Atheist's Rocks" or "I stand for absolutely nothing as a human being."

Dick

 

[Trogdor]

Just because someone isn't religious, does not mean that they stand for nothing. What an ignorant statement.

 

[Richard Gozinya]

..............

It had nothing to do with religion....dumb ass! It was totally about someone telling you what you can't do. Look past the obvious and get the point.

 

[EMcx2]

NuGuy You are truly enlightened.

Amen.

I'm an equal opportunity hater...I hate conservatives and liberals equally, and both sects have this country completely FUBARed.

My mother use to tell me that there are two things you don't discuss outside your home, politics, and religion. I wish more people would take that to heart.

Be that as it may, I still will take any opportunity to piss on any liberal or conservative I come across, just to make their blood pressure go up, and of course, for my own sick amusment.

My wife (now ex) became a holy roller bible thumper. In the interest in maintaining some semblance of domestic harmony, I went along to her church with her, which was filled to the brim of self-rightous, intolerant science haters, among other things. I tend to wear my indifference and contempt on my sleeve, so I was greatly amused at their attempts to convert me.

At one point, I was cornered by a gaggle of the faithfull with my wife present, and it became quite obnoxious. So I simply said to the "leader" that Thor would not approve.

"Thor?" she asked. "Yes, Thor, God of Thunder. For you see, Thor is my personal God, and he has promised that if I die in glorious battle during Rangnorok, that I shall be permitted to cross the Rainbow Bridge into Asguard and earn the right to Valhalla".

Now, I don't know beans about Thor that I didn't read in his comic book. But the absolute confusion and abject horror in their face is a memory that I will treasure for the rest of my days. My ex looked like she wanted to crawl under the nearest rock.

A sweet moment indeed. If tormenting them is evil, then yes, I am evil.

Nu

 

[lurker]

Amen.

I'm an equal opportunity hater...I hate conservatives and liberals equally, and both sects have this country completely FUBARed.

My mother use to tell me that there are two things you don't discuss outside your home, politics, and religion. I wish more people would take that to heart.

Be that as it may, I still will take any opportunity to piss on any liberal or conservative I come across, just to make their blood pressure go up, and of course, for my own sick amusment.

My wife (now ex) became a holy roller bible thumper. In the interest in maintaining some semblance of domestic harmony, I went along to her church with her, which was filled to the brim of self-rightous, intolerant science haters, among other things. I tend to wear my indifference and contempt on my sleeve, so I was greatly amused at their attempts to convert me.

At one point, I was cornered by a gaggle of the faithfull with my wife present, and it became quite obnoxious. So I simply said to the "leader" that Thor would not approve.

"Thor?" she asked. "Yes, Thor, God of Thunder. For you see, Thor is my personal God, and he has promised that if I die in glorious battle during Rangnorok, that I shall be permitted to cross the Rainbow Bridge into Asguard and earn the right to Valhalla".

Now, I don't know beans about Thor that I didn't read in his comic book. But the absolute confusion and abject horror in their face is a memory that I will treasure for the rest of my days. My ex looked like she wanted to crawl under the nearest rock.

A sweet moment indeed. If tormenting them is evil, then yes, I am evil.

Nu

excellent point. even the most ardent bible thumper is still an athiest about every god but their own, be it thor, allah, buddah, flying spaghetti monster, etc. funny that they alone have the enlightenment to comprehend that their god is the only true god

 

[Axel]

Here's a lanyard idea:

"You will worship MY version of God in the manner I dictate or you will go to MY version of Hell."

or:

"Heathen that you are, you cannot have my respect but you do have my pity."

 

[CA1900]

W W F S M D ?

 

[Crossky]

Hahaha I love it when a captain pulls out his bible to read it in-flight. I'm not sure if I should be scared because he knows something I dont, or scared because he's trying to start up a proselytizing session...

If you're afraid he knows something you don't (and he does if only by his faith and beliefs) then I encourage you to check it out, go for a test ride. Visit a local christian church with a good reputation, get a book about Jesus and find out for youself the answer to the question he asked his disciples in the gospels: "Who do YOU say that I am?"

Jesus is THE MOST enigmatic, attractive, and accessible religious personality ever, IMO. Blows away Mohammed, Budda, and all the others.

 

[Crossky]

My mother use to tell me that there are two things you don't discuss outside your home, politics, and religion. I wish more people would take that to heart.

So, what would our communities, our cities, our states, our nation, be like if everyone behaved like how your mother used to tell you? - BOORINGG! Politeness paired with thoughtfulness and respect goes a long way toward nurturing and maintaining a healthy society.

I talk about politics and religion with strangers, friends, and relatives all the time, you just have to respect others boundaries and preferences. If they don't want to talk, you don't have to talk. They'll let you know if you've gone too far.

Besides, politics and religion are IMPORTANT issues right? If only politicians and clergy talked about religion, the way our society functions would be disabled, and I won't stand for that.

 

[crashpad]

STOP QUOTING PAGE-LONG POSTS YOU FVCKING NERDS!!!!

LANYARDS SIMPLY DENOTE WHO WENT FROM BEING A LATCH-KEY KID, TO BE A LATCH-KEY ADULT!!!

I'm religeous, but the only thing that I speak up about is when the hotel van driver puts the Christian station on the radio. They either turn it off at my request, or pick up their last paycheck when they get back from the airport.

 

[Tram]

Anyway go in on some of these?

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