Really Need Ya'lls Advice!!!!

[Ace-of-the-Base]

Ace, just watch that mouth of your and we wont have these issues. I'm done, I just hope you are as well. If my note stings a little, then tough, as that was my intentions. You have infact singled me out on this post and others. Like I said, watch your tact, and we wont have these isses. So Long.

I really don't give a rats a$$ what you think and I'm not, as I said, offended or moved by you post. You are misguided in your vanity. I don't know who you are, I didn't single you out, and I really don't care what a foul-mouthed, low time Hawker pilot has to say to me. I'll keep posting and busting anyone's nutz who is dead wrong. If you get caught in the crossfire, sorry, but it ain't personal. Just try to come up with better retort than your mother gives BJs. It just doesn't sting. Busting my logic, might.

Try reading some posts by someone like Diesel, English or Avbug, they nail me sometimes and they do it well. Pracitce, study and get back to me. I'll be right here.

Ace

 

[CatYaaak]

I just keep laughing my rear off reading these posts!! Hey Hawk, you ever been on an aircraft carrier? Sleeping in little bunks with a bunch of other pilots, showering, sh$ting, shaving, all in public. Do you think they can't go fly a good sortie? Get the collective sticks out of your a$$s. There are bigger issues in this industry than snoring. Is this really what a group of pu$$ys the pilots of today have become? Get over yourselves.

Ace

Hey, if my company provided an F/A-18 Hornet to hit a competitor's HQ at dawn with a couple 1,000 pounders plus some canisters of napalm thrown in for good measure, and a full bin of 20mm to light up their "targets-of-opportunity" delivery trucks out on the interstate on my way back to the company hangar...he11, I'd bunk up with Richard Simmons.

(I'd still make sure he noticed I slept with a loaded .45 auto under my pillow, though. And btw, if anyone has any info on a job like this, PM me)

But until that day and job containing the aforementioned perks and rewards arrives in the corporate world, seperate hotel rooms is the standard.

And if it did indeed come to pass that the term "corporate warfare" actually meant something....why, what exciting days they'd be! Just imagine....

...Coke and Pepsi laid to waste through strike and counter-strike, Dr. Pepper finally rising like a carbonated bubble to it's rightful place atop the smouldering soft drink heap by default....

....Second-rate pretender to the Ketchup Throne Hunt's carpet-bombed into oblivion courtesy of Heinz, who's seemingly limitless supply of 500 lb, explosively-squishable, foil packets filled with Prez Reagan's (RIP) favorite vegetable rain down like matchsticks, thus settling the Ketchup Dispute once and for all.

...GM and Ford frantically re-tooling for a ground war as their flight departments vie overhead, and woe to Nissan or Honda or any other Matchbox Car Builder caught trying to intervene or carpetbag, unless of course they want another atomic a$$-stomping back home.....

....Armour's flight department deep-napalm-frying acres of Tyson's farms and pens pre-market in it's bid to have hot dogs and bologna reign 'oer chicken nuggets as the kid-fattening, Mystery Meat food of choice once again...

....Purina, in an unholy alliance with Petsmart and using the warm fuzzy-sounding, parent-targeted facade of Operation "Buy A Puppy...It's Real Life Fun", secretly breeding an evil, genetically-altered race of flying warrior monkeys trained to knock down fantasy-huckster/entertainment-octopus Disney's attempt to seize every American kid's leisure time and allowances using squadrons of Chitty Chitty Bang Bangs so vast they darken the sky commanded by a sugar-crazed Willy aloft in his Wonkavator....

....Kellog's pilots skywriting "Wheaties, The Breakfast of Pu$$ies" over the Twin Cities in a strategic psy-ops assault aimed at the cereal-munching masses. General Mills and it's pilots, responding in kind but with a flourish of cultural diversity and support for the arts befitting any good PDR of Minnesota "progressive" corporation by hiring some of the more...shall we say..."creatively-inclined" residents of downtown Minneapolis as expert consultants, retaliate and up the ante with the creation of a giant, detailed and colored Sky Mural depicting Tony the Tiger being bent-over and buggered by Fruit Loops Toucan Sam in the sky above Battle Creek.....

....FEDEX airplanes painted like UPS airplanes delivering all UPS packages to Timbuktu. UPS airplanes painted like FEDEX airplanes delivering all FEDEX packages to Vladivostok. USPS airplanes painted like UPS and FEDEX airplanes delivering FEDEX and UPS and USPS packages to other uninhabited, unspellable destinations. The alphabet-soup world of overnight package delivery sevice run amok and in chaos! Tracking numbers...useless!! Nobody knows where anything is!!! Anarchy!!!!...

....Insurance companies get busy hitting one another's insurees in around-the-clock sorties, driving rates and losses sky-high. Financial institutions join the fray...nobody's safe!....until Warren Buffett pools his assets in a bold-faced attempt to coalesce his power and become Emperor of the Planet sitting on a throne in Omaha, which inadvertently unites the remaining contenders against him, the final blow coming to his evil designs when NJI finally defects to the Forces of Good where they belong, and the NJA Armada remains on the ground, useless and whining, when it's pilots refuse to fly for anything less than $1,000,000 per year.....

...And of particularly foul and dripping ugliness would be the Mayonnaise Wars; putting the "he11" back in Hellman's, the main belligerents' use of modified, ag spray planes with hoppers filled with rancid, not-refrigerated-after-opened product to mount chemical attacks would cause even the most non-squeamish among us to turn away in disgust...


I swear, the possiblities and potential paths to glory would be simply endless.

 

[HawkerF/O]

Low time Hawker pilot? You are in your 60s and have 9K hours. Are you really calling me low time? What have you been doing with your time? Old school and washed up Hack. It's OK, 30 years from now most of us on here will be too. I am sure your thinking is just as out dated as the things on here you say. Oh, don't tell me, Q service is a waste of the boss' money, right? The F/O can come in and do full US updates when he is not flying, right ol' timer? No need to get over flight permits, we'll just set 'er down in Nawlins and clear customs there. And by the way, no need to change that policy, we've done things like this for 35 years, so I am not going to have some rookie cock-ah-roach pilot come in here and tell me what needs changing.

I really don't give a rats a$$ what you think and I'm not, as I said, offended or moved by you post. You are misguided in your vanity. I don't know who you are, I didn't single you out, and I really don't care what a foul-mouthed, low time Hawker pilot has to say to me. I'll keep posting and busting anyone's nutz who is dead wrong. If you get caught in the crossfire, sorry, but it ain't personal. Just try to come up with better retort than your mother gives BJs. It just doesn't sting. Busting my logic, might.

Try reading some posts by someone like Diesel, English or Avbug, they nail me sometimes and they do it well. Pracitce, study and get back to me. I'll be right here.

Ace

 

[Ace-of-the-Base]

Low time Hawker pilot? You are in your 60s and have 9K hours. Are you really calling me low time? What have you been doing with your time? Old school and washed up Hack. It's OK, 30 years from now most of us on here will be too. I am sure your thinking is just as out dated as the things on here you say. Oh, don't tell me, Q service is a waste of the boss' money, right? The F/O can come in and do full US updates when he is not flying, right ol' timer? No need to get over flight permits, we'll just set 'er down in Nawlins and clear customs there. And by the way, no need to change that policy, we've done things like this for 35 years, so I am not going to have some rookie cock-ah-roach pilot come in here and tell me what needs changing.

OK, much better. Now at least you're attacking my claims. Way more interesting.

As for my total time, I, like many on this board, have put down a number that would not compromise my identity. I have also not listed my other type ratings. It would be too easy for someone in Savannah or TEB to figure out who I am. And yes, I like being able to post anonymously. Suffice to say, I've got more time inside the marker than you have total.

Old? Yep, I am. Stagnant, never. I've been on more committees and have brought more automation and advanced procedures to this industry than you and 10 of your closest friends will ever do. We were one of the first flight departments to embrace EFBs (are you still using Q-service? wow). I fly an aircraft that makes your hawker look like a 286. As far as clearances and overflights, don't get me started. I've been to more counties in this world this month than you've been in your whole career. South of the border overflight? BFD. Try Cambodia, Sudan, Iraq, etc. Then give me your lecture. I'll listen.

Ace

 

[CatYaaak]

Try Cambodia, Sudan, Iraq, etc. Then give me your lecture. I'll listen.

Ace

Unlike some places, I've always found the "friendlies" in Khartoum to be actually quite friendly, but I'm not so sure about everyone running around with bandoliers filled with AK-rounds once you go outside of Saana across the water in Yemen. The "RPG Arrival" into Bagdhad is simply a "must do" for fun!.....spiraling 'round and 'round down to the ground...wheeeee! Now, as far as despot-run locales, Harare is just what you'd expect...a complete friggin' dump, but Tripoli is OK for a place run by the guy who posed for the Alaska Airlines logo and favors tents. Damascus looks much better at night than in the stark light of day, but whaddaya expect for the oldest, continuously-inhabited city on earth? Think of what it would take to renovate! The Pakistanis are allowing overflights to destinations in India nowadays, but I figure that's out of sympathy because you're....you know....going to India, and may possibly have to handle some of their money, money that gives real meaning to the phrase "Ewwww, do you know where that's been?".

 

[MEMfis]

Holy S*&T!!! I love this board. This is one of the reasons I couldn't resist the urge to finally register. Keep up the good work guys.

 

[Gulfstream 200]

OK, much better. Now at least you're attacking my claims. Way more interesting.

As for my total time, I, like many on this board, have put down a number that would not compromise my identity. I have also not listed my other type ratings. It would be too easy for someone in Savannah or TEB to figure out who I am. And yes, I like being able to post anonymously. Suffice to say, I've got more time inside the marker than you have total.

Old? Yep, I am. Stagnant, never. I've been on more committees and have brought more automation and advanced procedures to this industry than you and 10 of your closest friends will ever do. We were one of the first flight departments to embrace EFBs (are you still using Q-service? wow). I fly an aircraft that makes your hawker look like a 286. As far as clearances and overflights, don't get me started. I've been to more counties in this world this month than you've been in your whole career. South of the border overflight? BFD. Try Cambodia, Sudan, Iraq, etc. Then give me your lecture. I'll listen.

Ace

Im impressed....

.

 

[Denizen]

Wow, I need me some of them thar, Flying Warrior Monkeys. Borrow Snakum's trunk monkey and Avbug's IFR monkey and have the whole Trifecta of Monkey Henchmen.


All Glory to the Hypno-Toad!!

 

[Denizen]

Ooo Sorry about the thread creep.....drinking during the day and posting do NOT mix...

We now return you to your regulary schedualed B***HFest.







All Hail the Hypno-Toad!

 

[English]

Try reading some posts by someone like Diesel, English or Avbug, they nail me sometimes and they do it well. Pracitce, study and get back to me. I'll be right here.

Ace

<wiping away a tear> I think that's the nicest thing anyone's ever written about me!