Crew member as a 3rd wheel...

[XSWANN@240]

Hello,

I was wondering if anyone has dealt with this situtation. And, how did you handle it?

I fly with a crew of 3 (Capt.,F/O, and F/A). I'm the F/O. Over 90% of the time I work with the same people. The Capt. and F/A are having an affair that is very apparent and confessed to me by the F/A on one trip. I don't care that they're having their fling while away from home. It just effects the working environment. For example, they have arguements like husband and wife on front of our passengers and among many other things. When on long trips like 14 days on the road its the hardest.

Maybe I should be a slam clicker?

Any inputs will be appreciated... thanks...

 

[honeycomb]

F/A's are Nuts...

Once a/the F/A sleeps with the Capt. then she becomes the Capt. (at least in her mind). That was told to me by a very, veteran airline Capt., well intending fellow years ago. Sage advice to this day.

Sorry, you are in a though spot.

I don't think it would help to talk to either one of them calmly about your concerns. It would then cause them to target you as the enemy....and not each other as the enemy.

I am not a slam clicker....but I think that I would not want to be anywhere they happened to be....except when I had to be at work.

Do you have the ability to change crews? This is usually not an option....but a different job is always open. Maybe one of them is not going to stay and you luck out. If not....

Good Luck.

 

[maximizer]

these situations typically have a limited shelf life. be patient and let it run its course. of course you could always help things along a little---a candid video emailed to their spouses....ouch:nuts:

 

[Whataburger]

Point that jet toward Blackmail city and Get 'er Done!!!

 

[Flyoa1]

after you shoot the video, be sure to post a link!

 

[h25b]

It's not the situation that matters, it's what you do with the proof of it's existance that counts....

 

[Archie Bunker]

I fly with a crew of 3 (Capt.,F/O, and F/A). I'm the F/O. Over 90% of the time I work with the same people. The Capt. and F/A are having an affair that is very apparent and confessed to me by the F/A on one trip. I don't care that they're having their fling while away from home. It just effects the working environment. For example, they have arguements like husband and wife on front of our passengers and among many other things.

If the Capt and FA are fighting like husband and wife in front of pax, that is totally unacceptable. You need to have a private sitdown with the Capt and tell him what you see. Tell him that if you notice that behavior, then the pax do also. If he is unwilling to do anything about it, then you need to go up your chain of command and let somebody know what is going on.

Maybe I should be a slam clicker?

That won't solve anything.

 

[maximizer]

If the Capt and FA are fighting like husband and wife in front of pax, that is totally unacceptable. You need to have a private sitdown with the Capt and tell him what you see. Tell him that if you notice that behavior, then the pax do also. If he is unwilling to do anything about it, then you need to go up your chain of command and let somebody know what is going on.


.

whatever you do, don't follow the advise above. just keep yor powder dry. it will resolve itself.

 

[400A]

whatever you do, don't follow the advise above. just keep yor powder dry. it will resolve itself.

But what if their behavior is effecting safety of flight. Any crew member disputes can effect safety.

While I agree running and telling the boss may not be the best response, there could come a point.

I once had a crew over bootst a pair of starship engines by over 25% because they were fighting.If they had done it for 2 more seconds, it was 2 engine tear downs.

I think I would address them together. Like any other crew issue, you must verbalize it in private.

 

[wtrav8r]

these situations typically have a limited shelf life. be patient and let it run its course. of course you could always help things along a little---a candid video emailed to their spouses....ouch:nuts:

Take the advice of Maximizer...keep your nose clean and professional to ensure your job security.

These relationships hardly last and it will probably be over before you know it.

 

[Archie Bunker]

Take the advice of Maximizer...keep your nose clean and professional to ensure your job security.

These relationships hardly last and it will probably be over before you know it.

Horrible advice. In the meantime, while the Capt and the FA are acting unprofessional in full view of paying passengers, the FO is just supposed to bury his head in the sand, and ignore the situation. Real professional....great CRM.

XSwann, you are an integral part of this crew.....and if the Capt and FA are acting this way in full view of paying passengers, it reflects poorly on you too. You need to deal with the situation, not ignore it. If the Capt doesn't understand why you are talking to him in private about it, or if he tells you to pack sand and mind your own business, then I would go right to professional standards, or the Chief Pilot. If the Chief Pilot wants to know why you're bothering him with such trivial tripe (which I highly doubt), I'll go out on a limb here and say that you should seek employment elsewhere immediately. Any company that doesn't care about unprofessional behavior on the line isn't worth working for, in my opinion.

Seriously, would you want to fly on a jet where you just witnessed the Capt and FA arguing right in front of you?

 

[wtrav8r]

Archie-

Its not horrible advise as you suggest, its a sticky situation , and by being an Co-Pilot he may find himself unemployed very quick if this is gone about the wrong way. I'd rather be employed looking elsewhere than the other way around.

I agree with you that he should be looking elsewhere.

 

[honeycomb]

Archie,

I don't disagree with your original idea....because that is what I would do....but, maximizer/wtra8r said it best.

Look what we would do has no bearing on this. If he did what you have suggested he would not have asked for advice on the subject. Because that is common sense. I doubt this young man would let it effect safety of flight. He sounds smart...he'll keep the Capt. focused on his duties in the cockpit.

Personally, I have seen this happen. It turns out ugly ever-time.

As the other crew-member you can only lose Little or Big.

If he confronts them....well I think that would be losing Big.

But, hey I guess I like to be foward and direct. I only suggested things he might not be thinking about.

And, No this is not CRM.....unless it ruins Crew Harmony/A/C and Crew/Pax safety.

This will go away...very quickly. Most Companies....when they find out about such a thing....they fire the F/A. She is expendable. They find another....only for his sake I hope the Capt. doesn't start working her over too.

Peace.

 

[Guitar rocker]

Have you asked if you can join in and be a part of the team fun? 3's not always a crowd.

 

[pullmyfinger]

Hmmm

Have you asked if you can join in and be a part of the team fun? 3's not always a crowd.

It is when the Captain asks you to take the stick!

 

[XSWANN@240]

Horrible advice. In the meantime, while the Capt and the FA are acting unprofessional in full view of paying passengers, the FO is just supposed to bury his head in the sand, and ignore the situation. Real professional....great CRM.

Many times I have brought it to their attention telling them "This is not the place nor time. We have a job to do." But I grow tired of doing this.

Also, this issue is compounded because the Captain is the Chief Pilot. So, I have no choice to keep biting my tongue and continue looking for other employment.

So, thanks to all who responded with some serious advice and funny ones too!

thanks again...

 

[BizAvFA]

Are you above or below the Mason-Dixon line?

These situations do take care of themselves and everyone loves a trainwreck!

 

[Freight Dog]

XSWANN,

Being a 'slam-clicker' is not the right approach; instead, set the example for professionalism. Invite the captain to a meeting (over dinner, in the hotel room, doesn't matter) regarding concerns of yours. At the meeting, cover the basic points:

If they are arguing like husband and wife in front of passengers,

1. They are acting unprofessionally, embarrassing themselves, you, and the company in the process

2. A passenger at some point will eventually complain, leading to negative consequences professionally

3. Their open behavior will ultimately lead to being found out by their respective spouses, leading to negative consequences personally

4. As captain, and ESPECIALLY as chief pilot, he sets the standards for all pilots. He is supposed to be leading by example, meaning a GOOD example.
(Frankly, he should apologize to you for putting you in this position, but the most you can hope for is a change in behavior.)

I would leave it to him as captain and chief pilot to take care of talking to the flight attendant.

 

[400A]

XSWANN,

Being a 'slam-clicker' is not the right approach; instead, set the example for professionalism. Invite the captain to a meeting (over dinner, in the hotel room, doesn't matter) regarding concerns of yours. At the meeting, cover the basic points:

If they are arguing like husband and wife in front of passengers,

1. They are acting unprofessionally, embarrassing themselves, you, and the company in the process

2. A passenger at some point will eventually complain, leading to negative consequences professionally

3. Their open behavior will ultimately lead to being found out by their respective spouses, leading to negative consequences personally

4. As captain, and ESPECIALLY as chief pilot, he sets the standards for all pilots. He is supposed to be leading by example, meaning a GOOD example.
(Frankly, he should apologize to you for putting you in this position, but the most you can hope for is a change in behavior.)

I would leave it to him as captain and chief pilot to take care of talking to the flight attendant.

Very well said!!

 

[Archie Bunker]

Outstanding response Freight Dog!