bible thumping in DTW

[Snakum]

The only people that will be in heaven are those who love God.

But OUR heaven is much more fun. We have a stripper factory, a beer volcano, and a Holy Midget who is wise and compassionate.

All you guys get to do is walk around on streets of gold moping about how much fun you missed out on while on earth.

Join us! Allow yourselves to be touched by HIS noodly appendage! http://www.venganza.org/

Reverend Al Dente Fettuccini


(I agreed that the original poster shoulda just shrugged it off, but since you guys took this opportunity to turn the thread into another annoying Come To Jesus Meeting, I gotta put in a plug for our side.)

 

[WMT]

Snakum,

YOu are too much.

Almost every religion is trying to sell others the good word. If you believe Jesus is your saviour, then that is your own view and it shouldnt be chastized unto others. But just because an individual is a muslim, budhist, or non-believer does not make that individual a drunk alcoholic or pornificator. To think that only christians know the truth and need to sell the gospel to others is ethnocentrism. God (Allah, Jesus, FSM,..etc) created people from all different religions and cultures, not that we can detest each other but learn from each other.

People try to impose religious views unto others and the world is a perfect example of our bias opinions.

 

[dollacrackho]

i find it somewhat hard to believe that global warming is inversely proportional to the number of pirates!!! i've heard this theory before and always concluded that a closer correlation is found if you interchange number of pirates with number of bee gees.

 

[Snakum]

i've heard this theory before and always concluded that a closer correlation is found if you interchange number of pirates with number of bee gees.

Holy Chicken Alfredo, Batman! Bee-Gees? Who'd a thunk it? Could it be?

I shall take your most noble and highly quantitative math to our Pope, who is named Pepe. While we await the Pepe's decision ... may the Flying Spaghetti Monster be with you, and may you be touched by HIS blessed noodle!

Hey wait a minute ... you got charts? He'll wanna see those.


Rev. Al Dente Fettuccini
"Rah-MEN!"

 

[Snakum]

Get saved now ... ask me how!

http://www.venganza.org/


Accept the FSM as your personal savior! Be a Pastafarian! Visit the stripper factory, dress like a pirate, and drink from the beer volcano as you worship the holy midget.

Argggg me hardies! I be touched by His noodly appendage!


Rah-MEN!

Rev. Al Dente Fettuccini

 

[xjlifer]

Exactly how many brown spots can there be on a banana before you will not eat it?

 

[flydaddy0499]

Waaah waaaah waaaaah whine whine whine.....boo frickin hoo. What is with all you non-christians that anytime you see anything remotely christian you get all offended and start whining and bit-ching like a bunch of crybabies?? GET THE F--- OVER IT AND HIT THE F-ING DELETE KEY. IT TAKES ALL OF 3 SECONDS. The guy isn't tying you down to a chair and forcing you to listen to Christian rhetoric!! He sent out an email INVITING you to an OPTIONAL Bible study. If you don't wanna go, don't go!!! Do like the other 80 million people in the world would do!!! Hit the f-ing delete key and stop whining!! If you overhear people talking about church in a crew room you'd probably start f-ing bit-ching about how you don't need to overhear anything christian in the workplace because it offends your delicate sensibilities! Dude, you seriously need to get a life.

Well, being a former Minister of Music at an evangelical church, I haven't heard that much fowl language in defense of Christianity since my last choir rehearsal.

 

[Iceman21]

I have heard much of the same, but why complain when most other people are on the other side of the fence?

 

[saabservant]

Taking offense to an invitation is immature, but understandable. Does an invitation presume agreement?
As a Methodist(protestant) "gone bad" who has recently re-joined church life and study, I can see the CHALLENGE that faith is. It is MUCH harder than living in and of this world. Skywstman brings up the point. Goodness, responsibility, and works are part of secular and religious values and law, but are not enough. Faith, repentance, and forgiveness are what are demanded of us first.

As saab capt., I don't mind faith discussions, so long as I don't start them. They are informative and part of living together under God. But they can also be lively and distracting!!..."Did we do that descent checklist?"....

Please pray (if inclined) for all nwa plantation employees, as we suffer under the heels of these management jackals. And maybe even for spanjers and pohlad, too, for a little grace and ethics...

And yes, I too still sometimes swear like the marine i am. Regrettably. Dog blast it!

 

[rightrudder]

rightrudder, the Bible says there in not anyone righteous in the earth. So, Just because someone doesn't explore all the depths of sin does not mean they are righteous. Compared to some people a "good" non believer may seem righteous compared with his neighbor but we won't be compared to our friends and neighbors on that great day. We will be examined according to God's Word. The first commandment says "Love the Lord your God with all your heart...". A non believer may be good in his own eyes but he still hates
God. The only people that will be in heaven are those who love God. If you don't love Him here you won't love Him there.

You have completely missed my point. Your post equated being a non-believer with being irresponsible and doing harm to self and others. My point is that every "non-believer" is not a bad person, they can be fine humanists and treat others well and with respect. You don't have to be religious to be a good person.

I'm not talking about righteousness or going to heaven or hell or any of that. I'm not talking about ultimate salvation, i'm talking about behavior. Christians don't have a monopoly on behaving in a kind way with others.

 

[Snakum]

Well, being a former Minister of Music at an evangelical church, I haven't heard that much fowl language in defense of Christianity since my last choir rehearsal

I didn't read anything about chickens. What the hell are you talking about? :nuts:


Minhberg

 

[screwed_again]

A non-believer doesn't necessarily lead a destructive life and to harm to others including themselves, just like a believer can do bad things.

No, he doesn't lead a destructive life, he joins the ACLU.

 

[Snakum]

Christians don't have a monopoly on behaving in a kind way with others.

Indeed. Based on my personal experience, having grown up in a Christian household, and then having been around both Christians and lots of Buddhists in the twenty-five years since, I'd say that American protestant Christians have way, way more than their fair share of ill-mannered, egotistical, selfish, judgemental human beings. Even in the Methodist church I attend now, rarely a Sunday goes by that I don't hear of some scandal, schism, or downfall involving a church member. And then consider the acts of violence, and ven murder, committed in the last ten years by Protestant Christians here in the US.

As a group, and speaking generally, I'm afraid I'd have to say that Protestant Christians are running a close second to Muslims as the worst of the lot among the organized religions. And considering what Christianity's prophet, a divinely-inspired populist teacher, actually taught, it's a sad commentary on how badly things have run off the rails.

Minh

 

[Cardinal]

It's sad, really... xjhawk's own belief ystem is so fragile that he feels threatened the moment another tries to discuss their closely held views. Just like the weak pilot that becomes a monster in the cockpit, trying to conceal their own insecurity.

 

[Cardinal]

Easy on the protestants there, Snakum. Do the crusades or perhaps the Inquisition ring a bell?

 

[Snakum]

Easy on the protestants there, Snakum. Do the crusades or perhaps the Inquisition ring a bell?

I wuz just try'n to keep it recent.

Minh

 

[flydaddy0499]

I didn't read anything about chickens. What the hell are you talking about? :nuts:


Minhberg

Ummm...oops:0

 

[100LL... Again!]

Personally, I almost never 'evangelize'. I doubt I would be any good at it. Let preachers like Billy Graham do it. If I am asked, I will reply. You can usually tell if someone wants to know more. If they do not, then why are you bothering?

 

[flydaddy0499]

Hey Snakum,

Are those who subscribe to the FSM faith open-mided? I mean, would you accept one who has an affinity for Angel Hair pasta or Fettucine versus Spaghetti? You can still include the meatball symbology for commonality. We could call it the Flying Angel Hair Monster, or Flying Lasagna Monster. I realize this would constitute a tacit endorsement of multi-theism, but maybe we could try to live in harmony with people of varying pasta preferences?:beer:

What ya think?

 

[spike]

AWESOME POST my brother

 

[Snakum]

Are those who subscribe to the FSM faith open-mided? I mean, would you accept one who has an affinity for Angel Hair pasta or Fettucine versus Spaghetti? You can still include the meatball symbology for commonality. We could call it the Flying Angel Hair Monster, or Flying Lasagna Monster. I realize this would constitute a tacit endorsement of multi-theism, but maybe we could try to live in harmony with people of varying pasta preferences?

Unfortunately ... we are not. The Flying Spaghetti Monster is the only true faith and those who would advocate Angel Hair Pasta will never see the stripper factory nor the beer volcano. Rather, they will burn forever in hell, or .... be forced to move to Cleveland. Which ever is more painful.

Reject your heresy! Rejoin us as a true Pastafarian, worshipping the one true God. Be touched by HIS noodly appendage!

Rah-MEN!

Reverend Al Dente Fettuccini

 

[Mesabi Miner]

Rather, they will burn forever in hell, or .... be forced to move to Cleveland. Which ever is more painful.

Go easy on Cleveland. Yeah, the runways are a little close together and there are way too many hold-short lines, but in defense of the city, the Cuyahoga River hasn't burned in years...

I got wind of the email, the source of the thread. I now know the author and his intentions. This guy is truly a good guy and his purpose was only to unite the Christians from Mesaba that might be "idle" in their faith and experiencing a call back given these tough times at the airline. It's said that pain and suffering is God's bullhorn calling us back to him. In the wake of 9/11, I remember reading of the large attendances at religious services as people were "called back" by tragedy. The author simply was trying to "help back" people that had maybe drifted away. There was certainly no malintent to the email. Perhaps the content of this thread will cause the "offended" people to think about why they are so offended and what is causing the anger they are feeling.

... and the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame isn't so great, yet the Flats are cool.

MM

 

[Snakum]

but in defense of the city, the Cuyahoga River hasn't burned in years

LMAO! True dat! :laugh:

Bert and Ernie

 

[flydaddy0499]

Unfortunately ... we are not. The Flying Spaghetti Monster is the only true faith and those who would advocate Angel Hair Pasta will never see the stripper factory nor the beer volcano. Rather, they will burn forever in hell, or .... be forced to move to Cleveland. Which ever is more painful.

Reject your heresy! Rejoin us as a true Pastafarian, worshipping the one true God. Be touched by HIS noodly appendage!

Rah-MEN!

Reverend Al Dente Fettuccini

I'm not sure that I can walk such a straight and narrow. The calls from other pastas are piercing my soul from without and within. Conchiglie, farfalle, fusilli, gemelli, gnocchetti, gramigna, lumache, lumaconi, orecchiette, radiatori, route, rotini, and trenne, canneroni, cannolicchi, cavatappi, garganelli, macaroni, maccheroncelli, manicotti, paccheri, penne, rigatoni, tortiglioni, and ziti, Angel hair, capellini, chitarra, fedelini, vermicelli, fettuccine, lasagne, linguine, pappardelle, riginette, tagliatelle, trenette, Acini di pepe, alphabets, anellini, conchigliette, ditali, farfalline, orzo, pastine, risi, stele, stortini, tubetti, agnolotti, pansotti, ravioli, tortelli, and tortellini (Did I miss any??)

I feel I must go out in to the great beyond and query all pasta monsters and their great wisdom. There has to be more to life than the FSM. The anointed meat sauce is revered with many forms of pasta. The FSM is not the only one with "Noodly Appendages"!

 

[Snakum]

Blasphemy! Blasphemy, I say! Repent your heresies that you may visit the stripper factory and drink from the beer volcano!

The Holy One has withdrawn his noodly appendage from you! Upon your death you will be sent to the Land of Cleve to atone for your sins forever and ever. Rah-MEN!

May the rest of you be touched by HIS noodly appendage!


Reverend Al Dente Fetticcini

 

[NuGuy]

Unfortunately ... we are not. The Flying Spaghetti Monster is the only true faith and those who would advocate Angel Hair Pasta will never see the stripper factory nor the beer volcano. Rather, they will burn forever in hell, or .... be forced to move to Cleveland. Which ever is more painful.

There are those who have split from the Mother Church:

The Reformed Church of Alfredo, which anoints its members with various sauces according to the appropriate holy day. Alfredans believe that the Flying Spaghetti Monster has a nemesis called the Baked Ziti Beast, which takes all that is good and noodly and turns it into a sordid, dry, casserole-like affair. Alfredans are taught to avoid ziti and its relatives penne and mostaccoli in all their forms. Fundamentalist Alfredans believe that those who do not worship as they do will spend the afterlife caked in burnt sauce and cheese on the edges of the Baked Ziti Beast's casserole pan.

The Cult of Oregano, places special emphasis on the composition of the sauces, claiming that "without the oregano, nothing else would matter".

Beware of these cultists!

Seriously though...as humorous as the FSM site is, it gives me a nice way out of pesky religious interludes.

Nu

 

[LANDSCAPER]

Well, had he of asked me i would have gone.But then iam Pentecostal. We are aways looking for GOD'S FAVOR. Because one favor from GOD it can and will change your circumstances for the better.

 

[G100driver]

?????

We are aways looking for GOD'S FAVOR. Because one favor from GOD it can and will change your circumstances for the better.

How do you know god is asking you a favor? Does John Ashcroft inform you that god is asking you for a favor ... a snake perhaps? Nevermind, they are one in the same.

Off to the pumpkin patch and go shopping for a daughter's halloween costume's!

 

[Snakum]

Does John Ashcroft inform you that god is asking you for a favor ... a snake perhaps? Nevermind, they are one in the same.

Hey! Don't insult snakes like that.

Minh

 

[ultrarunner]

I just got an E mail from one of our (XJ)Captains based in Dtw...about an invitation to a gathering of someone preaching JEsus

Just gotta love those southern god-fearing bible thumpers...

"...hi, welcome to the neighborhood...what church do you belong to...?"

good grief