You know you are a regional CA when.....

[T-prop]

-You started out in a brand new metro-liner or shorts 360, upgraded in 3 months, have over 16,000 hrs and still work at the same commuter flying "the jet."

-Touch boys.

-Fail 3 interviews with American, sign a 16 year contract with a flow through agreement as that is the only way your bipolar ass can move on.

-You keep the company op-specs on your lap so you can point out to your FO how they are messing up throughout the flight.

-You throw a temper-tantrum hissyfit and run through every excuse in the book when you screw up or when the FO points out that you aren't following op-specs.

-At the end of the trip you apologize for being an asshole.

 

[fowingman]

heres a good one, you know you are a regional ca when...

1. The Ca's apr briefing is "mine onto 27L, standard callouts"
my reaction is buddy nothinbg about you is standard and, ofcourse we would do standard crap, what makes this approach any different that we would do any different"

2. When the Captain gives both celsius and farenheit and explains how he did the conversion over the PA.

3. takes control of the power levers when you are 90.1 percent instead of 90.

4. has to always be showing you something that he knows despite if its wrong

5. says he doesnt' let anyone land at a large airport unelss they have been flying for a min of a year in the 121 environment, asks so how many hours do you have in this aircaft, and you just want to say buddy i've been at this airlines over a 1 1/2 we've flown together a while back you idiot.

6. thinks its cool to be 59 and flying for a reional , and thinks it will get him girls

7. thinks the f.a's thinks it cool when he pinches their ass (f.a's 20, and the idiot 4 striper is 57 or 58)

 

[suupah]

when you get out of the hotel van the FO and FA have vanished! Leaving you to give the driver a tip.

Sorry CA but we broke.

 

[Bluto]

When you're not 30 yet, but the FO and FA look at you like you're their grandpa.

 

[crzepilot]

You guys are freaking hilarious because as an FO these statements are pretty funny because I see and here it all the time.

"I don't believe in tipping"

 

[jobear]

You know your a regional CA when you look to your right and see me...

Oh God kill me now!!!

 

[rjacobs]

you take over on you "bad" FOs landing and dang near kill 50 people, then act like you saved the day


classic

Youve flown with two of the captains at my airline havent you. The greatest one was this, it was my landing in an empty emb 145 in ORD in gusty cross wind conditions doing a flaps 22 approach with about 145 bugged on the Vapp. I bounced it, not bad but definetly a bounce and I held it off, probably about 3 feet off the runway and here was the conversation and actions that took place.
CA"Push the nose over your gonna stall"
Me"I got it, im just holdin it off"
CA"Push it over your gonna stall"
CA takes the yoke, slams it forward and we three point as hard as ive ever landed before in anything, then he looks over at me and goes "That was a S****y landing"
ME" Thanks for the help, but it wouldnt have been s****y if you had let me hold it off"
CA"You were gonna stall it"
Me"Whats stall speed on an empty airplane like 90 kts or less"
CA"Yea something around there"
ME"WE WERE DOING 130 KTS I WASNT GOING TO STALL and if I did we were three feet off the ground instead we did your version of a gracefull arrival"

There is another captain who did that to me once, but I fought him on the controls and salvaged it. The same captain who did it to me the second time also will just start changing headings and asking ATC for different headings for weather without ever asking me my opinion. We went about 100 miles north of course the other day because he didnt want to go through some thin clouds at 340 that were a mile wide at most and "looked rough" We were 100 miles away how did they look rough. How bout we go above or below them. I like to make money to, but keep me in the loop on what you want to do. If I ever fly with him again I will just leave it coupled to his side and when he switches it, ill just switch it back.

 

[Magneto]

you take over on you "bad" FOs landing and dang near kill 50 people, then act like you saved the day


classic

Can't tell you how many times that has happened.

 

[Going2Baja]

....."When your student load payment is more than your paycheck."

Baja.

 

[atlcrashpad]

The first page was Killing me. I was laughing so hard I was drawing a crowd. I had tears in my eyes and my gut hurts. Dat waz sum funny shiznit.

 

[Crossky]

Hey, the thread about regional FO was hilarious. I thought I would throw this one in:

- When a making a PA announcement in a B1900, you say "Hello Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Captain speaking..."

Yea, you're right, if you're a passenger on the smallest plane you've ever flown on, a vibrating tube with no flight attendant or lav, in which every seat has "both a window and an aisle", you don't care about hearing from the pilots, much less "The Captain". You're very comfortable and confident in the airplane and the pilots.

Puuleeze. {c:

 

[BoilerUP]

There is another captain who did that to me once, but I fought him on the controls and salvaged it.

WTFO?

Argue it out with the CA once you land, but for the love of jebus don't fight each other on the fargin controlls...

 

[COOPERVANE]

-You inform your FO that he/she is climbing at 248kts instead of 250 while they are hand flying. FO thinks "wow this guy MUST be sharp" next leg CA is flying at 260-270 with the autopilot on.

 

[wmuflyguy]

-You inform your FO that he/she is climbing at 248kts instead of 250 while they are hand flying. FO thinks "wow this guy MUST be sharp" next leg CA is flying at 260-270 with the autopilot on.

I had a captain like that.

I counted 9 times the whole flight he told me "now your speed control is key here". I hardly think ATC is goign to yell at us for being at 184 isntead of 180.

 

[acaTerry]

- as a 24-year old CA you tell your FOs how you're planning to be a B-767 CA by the age of 28

Today, you tell your FO about when you used to be a CA on the 767...sad aint it?

 

[zawillif]

You know you're a regional CA when . . .


-Every time the FO writes down the times you turn and say: "Call it 1255". Then the FO has to scratch out 1254 and scribble in 1255.


-You are 45 years old with 15,000 hours and you're still flying an RJ cause you like the schedule and mediocare pay.

 

[xjlifer]

"You are 45 years old with 15,000 hours and you're still flying an RJ cause you like the schedule and mediocare pay."

Ouch...sad but true...what the hell weekends off and 100k aint all bad

 

[flyer172r]

You whore yourself out as much as possible because you still believe that when you hit that 1000 turbine PIC you'll go to a major and life will be good.

 

[zawillif]

You know you're a regional CA when . . .

As soon as the ramper hands the bag count up, you look to see if there's live cargo. If there is you quick turn on the Condition Air because you don't trust the FO to do it on his own flow.

 

[Uncle Bunkle]

As the FO runs the Before T/O checklist, you calmly put on your black leather driving gloves...WTF?

 

[BuckMurdock1]

"You are 45 years old with 15,000 hours and you're still flying an RJ cause you like the schedule and mediocare pay."

For these individuals, I've found there's often another factor keeping them from moving on.......personality (sometimes a lack thereof).

 

[ERfly]

During the FO's legs, you can't keep your hands off the heading bug, when you're in NAV you spin it around before the AP cuts the corner. When ATC keeps telling you "Fly present heading" during an arrival you snip at your FO because you've already spun it around and he'll be flying the wrong heading if he doesn't spin it back around. I'd hate to wait until we roll wings level to just sync the bug...

I also liked the one about the FO flying when it's their leg, how come I've NEVER flown with a CA who announces it will be his leg?

That's when you play the Heading Bug Game. When he/she is not looking, turn it a few degrees off (no more than the width of the heading bug). When they sync it, wait a few seconds and move it again. It kept me entertained for my last 4-day with a d0uche bag.

Caution: Only do this when it's your leg and they're f'ing with the FD.

 

[belchfire]

You have to bum a smoke from the ramper...

Going somewhere else as an FO is a pay raise...

Your FO thinks that the $380 a month more for being in the left seat is a huge raise...

You realize that it is too late to go back to dental school...

Your wife makes more than you...and so do the AirTran FA's...

It don't matter that the company has no matching for their 401K program because you don't have anything to put in anyway...

The mechanics and dispatchers make more than you do and have better skeds...

 

[CJA]

Your know your a regional Capt. when:

1. your F.O. is on his first "real" job
2. your F.O. wasn't even born when you got your first "real" flying job
3. your F.O. has never flown a plane that weighed as much as the bags in your cargo compartment
4. your F.O. keeps telling ATC you are at three-one thousand because he/she has never been in the flight levels
5. your F.O. doesn't have enough time for a VFR Part 135 check ride.

 

[AWACoff]

You know you're a regional captain when:

Your F.O.s can't fly a visual approach

Your F.O.s think they are entitled to their job as an airline pilot

Your F.O.s violate FARs and company policy every leg because they are incompetent

Your F.O.s b.itch on Flightinfo because all the captains they fly with are "nitpicky, anal, etc." GUESS WHAT...maybe it's because you suck!



When the F.O.s fly like a captain, they get treated as such. Why should we have to babysit and flight instruct in a 121 enviroment...it's pathetic.

AWACoff

 

[xjgearbtch]

sounds like you need to tell the CP to raise the standards of who they hire.
Every leg eh.... sounds like a OCD issue to me.

 

[arthompson]

is the CP at Air Willy still Scott Orozco<sp?>?

 

[BoilerUP]

is the CP at Air Willy still Scott Orozco<sp?>?

Yes...and you spelled it right.

 

[blueridge71]

... when as the nonflying pilot you hint to the FO that you think it is time to add more flaps, gear, etc. by slowing reaching your hand toward the appropriate control, never touching it, but hovering a millimeter away so that you can activate it the very second that it is called for.

 

[Papps]

There is another captain who did that to me once, but I fought him on the controls and salvaged it.quote] Haha holy crap dude. Not the best idea, but reading about it is funny.