<in a tent, out behind the local airport, a man dressed in a dark cape and with a top-hat preaches to a group of young flight instructors...>
"I the amazing Garbonzo will now amaze and astound you by predicting the upgrade times at the various regionals..."
<gasp> <applause!!>
"Thats right...knowing only a little information regarding what the upgrade time was for people who were hired a few years ago we can accurately predict the fuuuuuutre!!!"
<more applause>
"I will need absolute silence as I gaze into my crystal ball and call upon the spirits of the aaaaafterlife...."
"Oooh great spirit of Tom Braniff... bequeath on us your vast wisdom... share with us the upgrade time for Chautauqua...Mesa...Mesaba..."
"Meditate with me everyone! We must channel the spirit of Juan Trip and of Howard Hughes..."
"Juan...Howard... visit us from beyond!!! Tell us of the future...."
<lights flicker on and off... and then.... silence..."
"Whoops. Sorry, RJ F/Os dont make enough to pay the electric bill. Sorry folks, there'll be another show at noon, dont forget to tell your friends."
<but sir, the upgrade time?>
"oh yeah...lets see...um...Juan Trip told me in a vision that the upgrade time at Chautauqua would be...um...lets saaaaay... more than 2 and less than 14 years. Yup. Be amazed. "