DCMartin
Well-known member
- Joined
- Apr 26, 2004
- Posts
- 94
[font=Geneva, Arial, Helvetica, san-serif]Thought this was a funny article:
Train Conductor Wishes He Was Pilot
by Josh Righter[/font]
Train Conductor Wishes He Was Pilot
by Josh Righter[/font]
[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Though he's not too shabby at running the R46 from Lancaster to Philadelphia everyday, Ray Morris can't help but long for the open blue of the skies.
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]The 47 year-old train conductor's original goal in life was to become a pilot for a
major airline, but "certain setbacks" prevented him from making his dream happen.
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major airline, but "certain setbacks" prevented him from making his dream happen.
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"I guess I just don't have what it takes," Morris said wistfully, staring into the cloudless sky. "That, and I flunked out of pilot's school over seventeen times."
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Forced to take a job as a train conductor to pay the bills, Morris confessed that he sometimes "injects a little pilot" into his job.
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"Being a train conductor's okay, but nothing beats being a pilot," he explained. "That's why sometimes I pretend that the R46 is actually a majestic airliner."
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]In addition to using "pilot lingo" such as "taking off" when departing the train from the station and "bringing her in for a landing" when arriving, Morris does his best to carry on his dream in his actions, as well.
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"As you can see here, I've attached oxygen masks over almost every seat," the conductor told us, gesturing the ceiling of the R64. "They're not really attached to oxygen, but their psychological value as far as calming down passengers is invaluable." [/font]
[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Morris also begins each train ride just as a pilot might begin his flight.
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"Before any departure, I get on the intercom and say, 'Ahhh, good evening folks, this your, ahhh, captain speaking,' and so forth. It just creates more of a personal bond between me and my passengers, and lets them know they've got a friend in the cockpit." [/font]
[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]During the "flight", Morris simulates turbulence and difficult weather conditions for added realism.
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"Sometimes I brake suddenly and frequently, as if there's a difficult weather pattern to get through," Morris said. "I've also been known to pretend to radio in to mission control that I've lost power in one of the engines, and that I'm going down fast." [/font]
[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Passengers don't always react to these situations in a positive way, but for Morris, it's all in the line of duty.
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"Every good pilot knows that some people just aren't emotionally equipped to handle the occasional stresses of flying. Luckily, that's where I step in. I'm always prepared to calm down a hysterical passenger, and believe me, we get our share. Some of them don't even realize that we're on a pretend plane."
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[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Though he may not be an actual pilot, it is the opinion of this editor, after witnessing a "take-off", that Morris may be the best impersonator of a pilot ever to conduct a train. [/font]
[font=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]"Folks, I hope you enjoy the in-flight movie, entitled, 'Toy Story 2'," Morris announced as passengers stared blankly at the back of their seats. "If you need anything, don't forget to ask our stewardesses. Enjoy your flight!" [/font]