This is a re-post from another message board:
I had an interesting ramp check not too long ago. I’m sure the state complaint rule hasn’t expired yet, but if the FAA were really after my certs, they would have done something by now.
I’d just landed at a VFR-only airport in low IMC conditions with a helicopter in the pattern using the ‘any port in an emergency’ rule. I’d transmitted in the blind that I was a Cherokee on emergency descent into the field. Alas in my desire to get to the runway, I neglected the before landing checklist and tried to land too fast, too high, and without flaps.
We passed the 2/3rds point on runway used and I initiated a go around. The airplane struggled to 400 feet, and I flew the pattern at 400. Of course the helicopter tried to make another approach at the same time so I was right behind him, making a mess out of things. He sidestepped to the other runway which allowed me to make a hot, but stable approach, landing on the long runway. On final, I heard the helicopter pilot asking if I had a real or simulated emergency.
I did complete the after landing checklist. On taxi into parking, I responded on frequency that there was nothing simulated about that emergency, got into parking, ran the shutdown checklist. I then demanded that my passenger get out. I bailed, and headed for the nearest restroom.
On my way across the ramp, I heard someone whistling at me, turned, and saw the pilot from the helicopter headed my way. I didn’t stop. The first door was locked and I almost ran into the helicopter pilot who had ran across the ramp to catch me. “I need to talk to you,” he said, looking quite angry.
I told him I had to go throw up, tell the TRACON that I was still alive, and then I could deal with him. He was speechless as I continued on to the restroom. He didn’t follow me inside, but my passenger reported he had ignored the guy, too, and the guy followed him into the men’s restroom.
Inside, I let the TRACON know I was still alive and ended up talking to their QA Guru about a deviation on my initial departure. The Tower had not let Approach know I refused their departure clearance and that they had offered to RADAR identify the DME fixes. Also, I was tracking the 340 Radial (s-turns across that radial anyways. . .) not the 310 as assigned. I explained the multiple equipment failures including the VOR and the fellow stated he would be forwarding this and the tapes on to the FSDO for a possible pilot deviation, and would be calling me again within 30 minutes.
I took care of physiological needs and headed back outside.
The pilot was standing in the hallway, guarding the restrooms. I then saw the FAA related embroidery on his jacket. Not a mad helicopter pilot, a mad FAA Inspector-type helicopter pilot that had just interrupted the checkride he was giving. He was on the phone talking to someone using our N-Number. I stood a respectful distance away and waited. After that poor approach and landing, I could understand anyone FAA-related having a few questions.
I apologized for not being able to talk with him immediately and we started talking. This Inspector checked my pilot certificates, made sure I was not giving flight instruction, and said he would have "got" me if I had been scud running without a "declared emergency".
He headed back to his checkride and ten minutes later another FAA Inspector called. They wanted a ramp check. Fine. Come on out, except I am having lunch first. I wasn’t shaking, but I knew I would be soon (adrenaline let-down). I asked them to call when they arrived and I would get back to the plane ASAP.
During lunch, the let-down occurred. About an hour later the second FAA Inspector called to say he was at the airplane. I headed out into a driving rain-storm to find two Inspectors, one Ops (pilot-type), one airworthiness (mechanic-type). The mechanic-type was an Inspector I had met the previous day at a large maintenance convention. He remembered me. I think the other guy was the one that issued my ground instructor certificate ages ago.
They invited me into their car (out of the rain) and asked for my certificates, which were still in my flight bag, in the airplane. Back out into the rain… They checked the certificates, writing down all the pertinent info. Now for my currency, how many hours in last 30 days, was I flight instructing, duty day limits, passenger carrying current, and can they see my logbook? My logbook is at home in a fire- & flood-proof safe. Please send a copy of the last 90 days and if it was too many pages, we could discuss it. They seemed quite reasonable for two guys that were called out of their cozy offices to go bust some idiot in a Cherokee that couldn’t fly IFR or land.
Next they wanted to see the last 30-day VOR Check and accepted my kneeboard notation from the Monday flight. Then let’s see the aircraft’s certificates and registration. Back out into the rain… Now a request for the aircraft’s logs. Those were at the aircraft owner’s house, one state away. Would I please send them the most recent of the basic airworthiness items (annual, pilot-static, transponder, etc.) and the entry for what the mechanic found was the cause of the emergency.
They then asked me what happened. I told them (airplane working great Monday & Tuesday, almost succeeded in killing me today). They asked several questions and I was able to pull out the appropriate charts to show them the answers including acknowledgement that I accepted a clearance into known forecast icing. They asked if I had declared an emergency to ATC. I told them that I didn’t know. I did know I’d told ATC about the first equipment failure.
Finally, the rain dried up, along with their questions, and we got out to inspect the aircraft. I told them that I’d only been back to the airplane once to tie it down, and that was it.
During that inspection we noted a large blue streak coming out of the top cowling. It wasn’t there on preflight. You could tell that the airplane had been washed and waxed recently (also a big help). The inspectors asked me to open the cowling. I did, and we found a large pool of 100LL and fuel trail leading to the #2 cylinder. The airworthiness inspector opinioned that the intake gasket had failed and that was our loss of power (and vacuum). They seemed rather happy that they were only doing a ramp check and not an accident investigation.
I asked then for a ride back to the FBO as the mechanic-passenger wanted to get a ferry permit. He hadn’t seen the intake leak yet. The inspectors seized the opportunity, I saw the gleam in the one’s eyes. On the way over to the hotel, we discussed some of the new technology from the convention.
Once at the FBO, I introduced the passenger/IA mechanic/also a VFR-only pilot. Sure enough, “We have some questions, can we discuss them with you [pointed look at me] alone?” The Feds ran him through the ringer for an hour. The outcome: plane not flyable, so no ferry permit, but repair the problem thus making the plane flyable and not needing a ferry permit.
Once I got back I sent the Feds their requested copies, filled out a NASA form, and set up a date with my flight instructor. The next business day I called my FAA Safety Program Manager. She suggested several things; I did every one of them, including calling the TRACON. Speaking to the same QA guy, I found out I had declared an emergency, therefore they didn’t pursue their deviation (violation) paperwork. “You declared an emergency, what can we do?” – why they didn’t process the violation. They had called the FSDO during the beginning of my flight (the nav failure), but no one jumped into the G-car ‘til one of their own called.
As for the airplane, the intake had completely separated from the cylinder. On reviewing the ATC records and a few other things, there is no reason why I am still alive.
Some tips:
Only fly airworthy airplanes. Comply with the regs, refuse the plane if it is missing something required, even just a page missing from the AFM, or illegible and undated compass correction card.
After an emergency, don’t be afraid to tell the investigators that you need some time to calm down before answering questions. I told the first guy he’d have to wait, I invited the second to join me for lunch. The extreme stress and spatial disorientation do take a toll on the body. Even the Cops let drunks throw up before cuffing and stuffing if they are non-violent.
Further, refuse the temptation to spill your guts and show signs of weaknesses. It is quite possible that there really is a mechanical problem with the airplane and whatever happened was not pilot error. Keep the “should haves” for your CFI/ASC. You made pilot-in-command decisions based on all the available information to you at that time.
Preflight always. Although I made several mistakes in dealing with the mechanical problems, inadequate preflight was not one of them. The blue streak on the fuselage was not there on preflight. The Inspectors noted my genuine surprise at the sight of the aircraft.
Be able to give a concise weather brief to any questioners for every flight. I was able to explain the weather system moving in, my strategy for avoidance, and the acknowledgement of the freezing level. We did discuss why I accepted the clearances and what I was dealing with at the time. My decision was going through ice to get VFR was better than back though the clouds to return to the departure airport.
Fly SAFE! (as in don't do as I do ;-)
Jedi Nein
). We just shot the ***t and that was all. 
