Radio Pet Peeves

[abenaki]

Reagrding asking "other traffic in the area of an uncontrolled airport to advise"...

The Citation X, as well as other jets have absolutely LOUSY visibility when it comes to spotting traffic. I will ask others in the area every time to "advise" me so I can try to avoid making a big pile of metal on the ground. The differing approach speeds and subsequent size of the patterns flown coupled with the lousy vis out the front of a jet makes it mandatory from my point of view to utilize every available tool.

Now, most astute private pilots will understand that you're honking along in your jet at probably twice their pattern speeds and will not be flying the same size pattern as they are. Letting you know where they are gives you a picture of what's going on at the field so you can plan your pattern and approach accordingly. Presumptuous or not, it's a good idea.

Additionally, the CVR will be recording your requests for "advise" and might keep your butt out of trouble, should, heaven forbid, an incident or accident occur.......At least you were trying to get information out of the traffic in the area.....


Also, while I think we all try to adhere to proper radio phraseology, especially in busy areas, I think it's be d'ed boring out there without some of the more entertaining and humurous phrases that I've heard. As long as the message gets communicated and doesn't interfere with what's going on, a little fun isn't going to hurt anyone.......Sometimes a good laugh on the radio is a good thing!

 

[Rush Limbaugh]

4fanman and Typhoon 1244,

"Clearance on request" is an Air Force thing, but like everything else in the Air Force, it doesn't make any sense.

 

[boxcar]

"When I fly six or seven legs a day I don't care if I follow the AIM exactly by the book. I pride myself on being a laid back pilot and not some uptight flying bible thumper."


Uptight bible thumper?? Are you being dismissive of religious pilots, or is your slur intended for those who follow AIM comm procedures?

 

[TheBeaver]

How about these guys that change their voice when they transmit on the radio. One second I am flying with a normal pilot then the next minute he is talking to ATC with a "West-Virginia Hill-Jack" accent.

One guy I flew with keyed the mike and talked with a Southern accent, but I knew he was from Ohio. I checked the RMI to see if he was in the southern half of the cockpit.

I instructed a guy who had a normal voice, but when he keyed the mike he turned into Darth Vader. The first few times he answered ATC, I thought another aircraft answered our ATC call.

Additionally, I've heard pilots apparently convert from Jewish to Irish-Catholic just by changing from New York to Boston Center. What is with this?

I have my own story though: I pulled up to the drive-through window at McDonald’s and wasn’t sure what I wanted. I tentatively asked for a value meal and the employee responded with “Yes, ma’am, please pull forward”. Seriously embarrassed, I cleared my throat and responded with “Thank you” in the lowest octave available. As we drove to the window, my girlfriend laughed so hard she lost a contact.

 

[MLS]

boxcar,

All I'm saying is I have flown with people that are to much by the book (AIM, FOM, ect). They have very little practical experience so if it's not in the book (AIM, FOM, ect.) they have no clue what to do.

The AIM is not a regulatory book, although it has procedures that must be followed in order to keep people on the same page sort of speak, but take it for what it is. FARs would never regulate what you say or don't say on the radio.

Yes there are radio calls I have to laugh at periodically but I find it entertaining and certainly wouldn't lose sleep over what they said whether it was inline with the AIM or not.

No my post was not derogatory to religion just don't care for people pushing the AIM way as the only way.

 

[Anne]

Our little airstrip is too small for jets; we have no jet traffic blasting in at 250 knots. It is all single engine aircraft. I truly have never heard everyone in the pattern and area pipe up and say where they were at the request of someone saying please advise. So at best, you might hear a couple people, but you might also get a false sense of security. Look AND listen.

 

[KigAir]

Out of SFO more than anywhere else....

United 1 to Sierra dep...Aloha

United 2 to Sierra dep...Konichiwa

Speedbird 345 to Sierra Departure...Arouvoi

American 544 to Sierra Departure...Adios


Ok...I know ya'll are cool guys, but please don't give us some lame sendoff just becasue you fly internationally!!!

Squeeze Pilot
Mookie

I once heard a JAX Approach Controller handing traffic off in this fashion. I thought it was quite entertaining.

 

[Rush Limbaugh]

I get a kick out of these almighty jet pilots trying to convince everyone to conform to them because after all, they are "blasting in" at 250 knots. I wonder if they ever consider SLOWING THE F*CK DOWN!!!! Or better yet, they are going into a VFR uncontrolled pattern, so cancel AND slow down. Then maybe, just maybe, you can switch to unicom before you are "right over the airport."

Just because you can legally fly at 250 knots doesn't mean you have to, nor do you have to be IFR just because you have an instrument rating. I'd bet it isn't hard to fly a Citation at 200 or....gasp...even slower and it probably doesn't spontaneously combust if it isn't IFR.

So now that that's out of the way, if there are 8 airplanes in a pattern and "Almighty Jet Pilot" says "all traffic, please advise" and by some miracle of nature, all 8 decide to respond, they would be stepping all over each other and Mr. Almighty would not have any more SA than he did before he asked the question. So tell me, how exactly are these pilots suppossed to respond to you? Maybe the first in line for landing could be first and then the second and then the third and so on. How does that sound? Or maybe a high SA CFI could advise Mr. Almighty, "go to the water tower and hold until you get enough SA to enter the pattern."

 

[ksu_aviator]

"The best advice to be given about communications is that you say more with less. For example, let's say you want VFR flight following. Once you've established contact with the facility, just provide your position and altitude and say you're "VFR to East Armpit." You don't have to say "Request flight following." ATC will know what you want. It will assign a code if it can work you; you set the code in your transponder, and you're set. Transaction completed."

Both of these are short cuts and aren't good. Especially the transponder bit. Can you imagine just climbing to 10K without talking to ATC, yeah they cleared you and they know, but you still have to read it back, just in case you thought they said 15K. Don't take short cuts.

"I have to agree with the fast ATIS. There's some guy down in CAE that has determined to make it his goal in life that pilots listen to the ATIS 4 times in order to write it down."

Fast ATIS may come from a tower manned by one person trying to lay down the ATIS while he/she has 4 or 5 cessnas doing touch and go's.

With regards to listening to uncotrolled requencies...Mesaba flies a lot of very short routes. MSP to STC and TUP to GTR come to mind. 15 minutes or less. In that time the PNF will contact ATC, then ops for the airport deprated, get ATIS/ASOS, contact ops for the airport landing, do the after t/o checks, 10K flow, cruise checks, descent checks, approach checks and then, if they have time they'll dial in the uncontrolled frequency and listen. Don't assume just because the airplane looks effortless from the outside that the cockpit isn't very busy. And if someone asks, take a second to advise, its good technique and helps keep everyone safe. And always watch for aircraft, even IFR.

My pet peeve is changing frequencies and then keying the mic before you even have a chance to hear if any other transmitions are going on.

And BTW, Mesaba doesn't like being called Flagship either, no disrespect, just not cool.

 

[DJS]

Peeves

I'm a low hour pilot, sputtering around in a rental 172, but I do

1. Respond if someone asks for a traffic advisory. If someone is either (a) clueless or (b) coming in too fast to listen, I'd like them to know there are others (me!) in the pattern.

2. Try to make all my calls as short as possible.

But my own pet peeve is really nothing more than jealousy:

I really hate it when I overhear ATC instructing some jet to slow down to more than twice as fast as my pokey little plane will go. Sigh...

...Dave