UA-RESURRECTED said:
Take a piece of chalk and draw a line in the center from the top of the overhead panel all the way down through the glare shield and on through the instrument panel and console. Just remember that everything to the left of that line belongs to the Captain and everthing on the rights side of that line also belongs to the Captain.
You are also allowed to stop cleaning the center console instruments with a tooth pick during landings and watch the Master at work. After scaring the hell out of you during the landing the captain will tell you to get back to your cleaning assignment.
You will also be in charge of keeping the keys to the aircraft during the overnight. That prevents another crew from taking the aircraft the next morning and you can then leave all your personal items in the cockpit on the overnight. Be sure to get some more tooth picks while you are paying for the Captain's and your breakfast. He will like your initative and allow you to ride in the hotel van with him and the FA's back to the airport.
Make sure you offer to take his personal liquor bottle and Leatherman plus all items he stole from the hotel room and place then in your flight bag before you go through security. Also if he has to take his uniform shoes off before going through security make sure you shine them on the tail of your uniform shirt before the King has you put them back on his feet.
Arriving back at the aircraft you will get a little break from him while you clean the cabin for the FA's. He will normally allow the best looking FA to do all the first flight of the day duties and the challenge items on the check list. As soon as she exits the cockpit make sure she is happy with the tooth pick cleaning you did in the lav. Make sure you don't use the same toothpick that you cleaned the lav with to then clean the galley or heaven forbid the center console in the cockpit.
Constantly tell him he is the best aviator you have ever had the pleasure to watch in action. At the end of the trip ask him if he would please attest to your log book entries by signing your log. Insist that he allow you to take his Jepps home with you and appear sincere when you tell him that those 20 Revisions will only take a few minutes of your time.
I hope these suggestions are helpful. You probably shouldn't post on this forum again without getting a letter of recommendation from your Captain. He will take favor with you for knowing your place. Try to remember to take notes in a spiral ring notebook of all his favorite little quirks so that he won't spend the first 30 minutes going over his list the next month you get matching lines.
One last suggestion. Remember to walk three feet behind and slightly to the right of the Captain at all times. If he ever stops to talk with another Captain don't try to engage in the conversation and don't make eye contact. Also don't take offense if he refers to you as Stupid or Numbnuts during his converastion. If he didn't like you he wouldn't even acknowledge that you are his FO. He will certainly like the fact that you know your place. Some day you will be able to move over to the left seat and occupy the Throne. Enjoy your career.
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