Pet peeves from the ATC folks

[threegreen]

What's position and hold?

 

[Lrjtcaptain]

What's position and hold?

I have failed to get the humor here

 

[Kream926]

What's position and hold?

line up and wait, if you're european


speaking if such, i teach alot of JAA students so they mix the "hold your position" and "position and hold"

they get all dumbfounded with me when i tell em to start rollin and they look at me like im from outer space. the one time i let the same kid get it from tower when they werent busy real early one morn, unplugged his speaker jack and asked tower to issue such command. "cessna 12345 position and hold"
and he reads back "position and hold". o boy did he get it from em. sometimes you gotta let em crash and burn (not literally) on their own before they get it. hasnt made that mistake since

 

[whaleroast]

Freq switch:

'Blah, switch to my frequency ###.##'

Do you guys appreciate a call like:

'Blah has made the switch.'

Or are you assuming it has been done and any communication is redundant?

 

[kf4amu]

As a 911 dispatcher I can vouch for the "callup without a purpose" pet peeve. My biggest pet peeve workin a fire/ems operations channel is someone saying "unit # dispatch" without asking or saying anything.

What, you didnt ask a question or state a problem. What you said makes no sense. I shouldnt even acknowledge your stupidity by responding.

WHO MADE THIS ACCEPTED AND "PROPER" RADIO PROCEDURE!!! AAAHHHH!!

For instance....simple request, such as an ambulance going off duty, any status changes (enroute, on scene etc), aircraft requesting different altitude, a different approach, etc etc.

XXX: "XXX dispatch (approach, whateveR)"
ATC/911: "GO AHEAD"
XXX: "Request blah blah....Medic 24 enroute (whatever)"
ATC/911: "10-4, affirmative, roger, whatever"

4 transmissions when you REALLY need....

XXX: "Medic 24 enroute/request 6000"
ATC/911: Medic 24 10-4, roger whatever/6000 approved"

DONE, less than half the time.

ARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHH, so friggin annoying. Im doin a ATC minor, thinkin about being a controller but I dont know if I could do this my whole life. I know I couldnt be a 911 dispatcher all my life.

 

[Princedietrich]

As a freight dawg that goes in and out of CLE and BKL frequently, here's my major gripe. Just last week I did a leg from BKL to LCK in a Caravan. I was assigned 360 at 2000 for at least 7 or 8 miles (rough estimate, the crib was WAY behind me and downtown looked really small). I then got a turn to 280 for several more miles. Abeam CLE I was cleared to 6000. When I got abeam Lorain, it was a turn south. It was somewhere around Medina before I finally got "on course."

So here's my question.

Would it not have been easier to keep me low and have me go south from BKL so I'd be under and out of the way of the heavy metal? It would get me home sooner and you wouldn't have to deal with me as long.

I do like doing the night freight thing when it comes to ATC. Most times, I'm either the only one going into the airport so the airspace is all mine. The rest of the time I'm going into that airport with other freight dawgs who are just as crazy as I am. Plus, controllers on the graveyard shift seem to be rather bored and kinda lonely so there's potential for good conversation.

Here's one that I'll pass on to you ATC guys. I don't know if you're graveyard shift controllers, but if you need a Starchecker to do a slam dunk or a high and fast don't hesitate to ask. We'll not only pull it off, but we'll look good doing it and will be thanking you for it.


To lighten the mood, here's one that I heard way back when during my CFII days. We were over southern Ohio talking to Indy Center, and a pilot chimed in on frequency "with a query." The controller's response was "You know what a query is right?" Several moments of confused silence, then the controller responded by saying "a straight question." My student and I were busting a gut, and I was wondering if it was actually legal for him to say something like that on ATC. Oh, in case it didn't come across clearly in the translation to written text, the pilot pronounced it "queery."

One day at BWI during a really nasty rainstorm, we were in the full grip of a massive gate hold and saw a Mooney taxiing out. The Mooney chimed in and asked the controller to "say conditions," and anyone could tell that he was trying to get the controller to say on tape that it was visual conditions so the Mooney could depart VFR. The controller's response was "look out the window." The Mooney pilot got all huffy and berated the controller for being so rude, but personally I think the guy deserved to get his chops busted for such a stupid question.

Finally, here's a really humorous one. Working as a starving CFI/slave at BKL years ago, I was in an office that was about 10 feet down the hallway from the door leading to the control tower stairs. One controller, a rather teddy-bearish and friendly fellow named Steve, was getting ready to go upstairs and go on shift when the door suffered a bit of a malfunction. The doorknob came off in his hand and he couldn't get in. He got on the phone to the cab and was yelling in desperation for Jack (the on duty controller) to come down and let him in because "the damn door handle fell off!" The next day, a sign had been placed on the door stating "this door has been rendered inoperative by the control tower gorilla."

 

[Say Again Over]

so they mix the "hold your position" and "position and hold"

they get all dumbfounded with me when i tell em to start rollin by kream

Sounds like they need to learn English first, "position and hold", "hold short", "hold your position", all nice things to know if your a pilot.

 

[threegreen]

Whats the big deal about calling ATC first before stating your request... ATC does it to us when they have an unusual request, and it usually helps more than it hurts.

Sometimes ATC is on the land line, telling a joke, drinking coffee, whatever and may not be able to process the entirety of the request the first time it's transmitted unless an 'attention-getting' xmission is used. Same goes for pilots.

 

[GVFlyer]

ATC Guys...

Yesterday's Wall Street Journal said average controller pay was $166,000.00, what do the most senior controllers make?

GV

 

[kf4amu]

Whats the big deal about calling ATC first before stating your request... ATC does it to us when they have an unusual request, and it usually helps more than it hurts.

Sometimes ATC is on the land line, telling a joke, drinking coffee, whatever and may not be able to process the entirety of the request the first time it's transmitted unless an 'attention-getting' xmission is used. Same goes for pilots.

I think the key word is "unusual request". In this case, I agree. Most transmissions are not unusual.

Why do it in 4 if you can do it in 2 just as easily? And if they (pilot or ATC) misses it the first time, and the other party needs to repeat it, you still only have 3 transmissions instead of 4.