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Missing the W2 Thread for 2015

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I think we need a strangest place you've pooped thread.

I pooped in the cockpit once... but when I went to clean it up it wasn't there! phantom poo. I found it later and kicked it under a drink cart. not the strangest place i've pooped, but makes for an interesting story.
 
I think we need a strangest place you've pooped thread.

I pooped in the cockpit once... but when I went to clean it up it wasn't there! phantom poo. I found it later and kicked it under a drink cart. not the strangest place i've pooped, but makes for an interesting story.

You told me that story when we were flying together. I almost died of asphyxiation. Still the funniest aviation story I've ever heard.
 
apparently, the story has gotten out... and as all good tales go, it's morphed into much more!

I actually overheard a crew telling my story at a bar one night... Usually, I would never ruin a good story with the truth, but I had to interject as there were major inaccuracies. They didn't believe me until I told them that i was there....

lessons learned... never trust a fart knocking at the door, it may have friends.
 
Do you prefer farting in the lav while in flight, or waiting until after exiting the plane, cropdusting up the jetway?
 
I think we need a strangest place you've pooped thread.

I pooped in the cockpit once... but when I went to clean it up it wasn't there! phantom poo. I found it later and kicked it under a drink cart. not the strangest place i've pooped, but makes for an interesting story.

Thanks for sharing........really?
 
You get to a point where when you hear the toilet flush in the first-class lav behind the cockpit, you can tell by the timbre of the sound if it is solid, liquid, or pure death. This is a useful skill in long range flying. Scenario. You call for a restroom break, and the lead FA informs you that someone is in the restroom. Your decision on how long to delay your comfort break should be based on your judgment of the character of that flush.

"bwwOOOSH!" is just a number one. Take your break immediately.

"bu-duh-(pause)bDOOOOZH!!!!!" is a Deuce. Chat with the FA for a minute before leaving the flightdeck.

When you hear the flush valve open, and then a *schhhwunk*, moment of silence, pause, then "BBAAMM WHOOOOOOOOOOOSHHHHhhhh!!!", you can be absolutely guaranteed that a human being has just attempted in vain to lay an egg in your airplane. In this case you must Jedi Mind-Trick the other pilot into going first.
 
1.5 year FO 737

100K Gross (5 months probation pay, 7 Months 2nd year pay)
9300 401k company contribution
15.6K Profit sharing
7K per diem (not really compensation, but lets you know what to expect)
Live in Domicile
 
You get to a point where when you hear the toilet flush in the first-class lav behind the cockpit, you can tell by the timbre of the sound if it is solid, liquid, or pure death. This is a useful skill in long range flying. Scenario. You call for a restroom break, and the lead FA informs you that someone is in the restroom. Your decision on how long to delay your comfort break should be based on your judgment of the character of that flush.

"bwwOOOSH!" is just a number one. Take your break immediately.

"bu-duh-(pause)bDOOOOZH!!!!!" is a Deuce. Chat with the FA for a minute before leaving the flightdeck.

When you hear the flush valve open, and then a *schhhwunk*, moment of silence, pause, then "BBAAMM WHOOOOOOOOOOOSHHHHhhhh!!!", you can be absolutely guaranteed that a human being has just attempted in vain to lay an egg in your airplane. In this case you must Jedi Mind-Trick the other pilot into going first.

Excellent!!!!
 

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