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license lost for child support???
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apcooper
Dude, where's my country?
- Joined
- Sep 4, 2004
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avbug said:
Post your ex's as well as the DA's name, number, address and e-mail on flightinfo.com for the world to see, and see then how quickly they shape up!!! I'll bet faster than I can say perjury!!!!! Please however don't lower yourself to their level be libeling, slandering or defaming them. Supreme humiliation and accountability is all I'm asking for here just like Bill O'reilly does on his radio and TV shows to politicians and other powerful people who screw the average joe.
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dondk
Don't you wish
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2001
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A few notes on this whole CS issue... A Squared nailed most of it...
Some states CS agencies are akin to bounty hunters, they will use whatever tactic's thay can use.
Some counties "need" to show that they are doing a good job at collecting CS, those who do better get more $$$ from state/federal programs. You need to realize that $$$ drives this machine and not common sense.
The time that the female "claims" your the parent to the time they prove is all charged to the male. That is called arrear's and how the system is designed, the male will be in arrears from day one. Even if it takes the courts several months to make a CS cases offical, you start with a massive amount you owe.
Now I know some holier than thou will say "just pay it".. Note.. when it is determined you are NOT the parent, it is an uphill battle to get your money back, in most cases you have to file a civil suit against what is basically city hall. Will you get an apology? not likely....
I pay my CS too.. I also have a constant arrear's because that is the way the system is designed. I also have never seen my child (ever) and the courts will not compel the mother to bring forward the child. For all I know the child can be in another state (the agency does not have to provide their address). I also have just over a year left of my obligation, then I wil pay the arrears for maybe another year or so later. I am not bitter or angry, this is just the way it is.. Those articles many read in the papers or hear about are the worst of the worst. You never hear about the stories of the guys who do things right and still get burned. Funny how it works that way...
Some states CS agencies are akin to bounty hunters, they will use whatever tactic's thay can use.
Some counties "need" to show that they are doing a good job at collecting CS, those who do better get more $$$ from state/federal programs. You need to realize that $$$ drives this machine and not common sense.
The time that the female "claims" your the parent to the time they prove is all charged to the male. That is called arrear's and how the system is designed, the male will be in arrears from day one. Even if it takes the courts several months to make a CS cases offical, you start with a massive amount you owe.
Now I know some holier than thou will say "just pay it".. Note.. when it is determined you are NOT the parent, it is an uphill battle to get your money back, in most cases you have to file a civil suit against what is basically city hall. Will you get an apology? not likely....
I pay my CS too.. I also have a constant arrear's because that is the way the system is designed. I also have never seen my child (ever) and the courts will not compel the mother to bring forward the child. For all I know the child can be in another state (the agency does not have to provide their address). I also have just over a year left of my obligation, then I wil pay the arrears for maybe another year or so later. I am not bitter or angry, this is just the way it is.. Those articles many read in the papers or hear about are the worst of the worst. You never hear about the stories of the guys who do things right and still get burned. Funny how it works that way...
I stand corrected on the jurisdiction issue. I remember listing the licences (fishing license included) but since it never came down to actually having anything revoked/suspended I never gave much thought to the jurisdiction. I suppose some shark lawyer with the right judge could figure out a way to get it done. Kinda like the passport thing.
And dondk understated the zeal with which these agencies will persecute and the heavily weighted laws that allow it. The innocent are punished with the guilty. Vicious, vicious industry: CS enforcement.
And dondk understated the zeal with which these agencies will persecute and the heavily weighted laws that allow it. The innocent are punished with the guilty. Vicious, vicious industry: CS enforcement.
dondk
Don't you wish
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2001
- Posts
- 887
Axel said:
What I have seen in the courtrooms over the past 20 years.. Much like Avbug's but much worse. I did understate the zeal, but unless you live it.. you cannot understand it.. Too many think the playing field is level.. the reality is your screwed from day 1 and short of death.. there is no way out.
I personally have not had a tax refund (federal) in about 10 years.. Then again I have learned how to play the system (legally) to get some of my money back.
You don't always need a shark lawyer.. Some locations are like living in a police state, but that is only because they can get away with it. You need to find a state/county that is more favorable to your situation. Believe it or not, some CS agencies are actually progressive and try to level the playing field or at least give you a fair chance. These agencies also have to play by certain rules, get out from their juristiction and you will see differences.
Vector4fun
Well-known member
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2003
- Posts
- 796
Avbug,
If it's any consolation, (it was for me), when the kids are 19-20 yrs old or so, (and if they have any character), hand them the file with all the legal documents, and a comfortable reading chair. Come back after a couple beers and see the look in their eyes. I never bad-mouthed their mother to them, I just let them see the truth for themselves...
Priceless.
If it's any consolation, (it was for me), when the kids are 19-20 yrs old or so, (and if they have any character), hand them the file with all the legal documents, and a comfortable reading chair. Come back after a couple beers and see the look in their eyes. I never bad-mouthed their mother to them, I just let them see the truth for themselves...
Priceless.
dondk
Don't you wish
- Joined
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Vector4fun,
I have always thought along those lines. The value is what I am worried about... How much impact did it really make?
You also got lucky.. NY is until 21.. Makes you think that when you decide to have kids to have them in a state that does not go for more than 18 years, mine is not even in college either! IF she would decide then it would be to 24...
Gotta love a system that makes it hard to keep a family together after a divorce.
I have always thought along those lines. The value is what I am worried about... How much impact did it really make?
You also got lucky.. NY is until 21.. Makes you think that when you decide to have kids to have them in a state that does not go for more than 18 years, mine is not even in college either! IF she would decide then it would be to 24...
Gotta love a system that makes it hard to keep a family together after a divorce.
She's a bad mother. Last time I had the kids, we looked at photographs I took of them once in their halloween costumes. One of the youngest said that this year, he wants to dress up as a mother, because it's the scariest thing he could think of.
However, she is their mother. I can't take them away, however much they should be taken away. And not tomorrow, not ten, not twenty years from now am I going to villify their mother. Not even with the facts. I'm not looking to use the kids as my battle ground; they're innocents, and if they end up one day with a rosy picture of their mother, I'm not going to do anything to alter that. Why would I?
What if you were surprised with new evidence that your mother was a lying whore who used you and did all manner of things that shock the image you've held of her since child hood? For some that might lead to some serious psychological issues.
The woman is a bitch. If she were a dog, I'd have had her euthanized or shot years ago. But she isn't dog, and all I can do is take one day at a time. I don't get to see the kids unless I pay. The kids are afraid of her. They don't eat well. I buy them shoes and she throws them away, leaves them in junk that's literally falling apart. She refuses to seek medical attention for them.
A couple of years ago at a family wedding, three of them mysteriously showed up with my ex. One of the younger ones approached me while I was standing with my father and brother. Holding my leg and looking up at me he said, "Daddy, uncle chet beats me with a stick." Personally, I'd like to see "uncle chet" as the backdrop for the sillouette of a .44 front sight...along with the rest of them. I really would. But in today's society...in a land where child protective services won't lift a finger (told me straight up that without photographic evidence of head injuries or a dead body, they wouldn't even investigate)...what is one to do?
For now, I have the privilege of reminding them to listen to their mother, to encourage them to support her, to encourage them to be as good as they can be in the hopes that she won't scream at them or strike them. My own intervention will only lead to my incarceration, where I can do them no good at all. The law has no interest in the safety or welfare of the children, the judge who made these calls probably sits in expensive home when he's not ruining people's lives, completely free of any debits of conscience. A few seconds of his wasted time on the bench, and entire families will pay for decades with their lives.
They money I spend is nothing; it's inconsequential. At times it's been more than I bring in...often the total amount I've sent to here has exceeded my income, and I've hawked my few posessions. Headsets, firearms, my parachutes. Whatever I've had. The money is nothing, however. The children are everything, and short of taking the law into my own hands, completely out of my reach. I visit them, I try to give them stability and support...but a mother can do no wrong in the eyes of the court, and I am not their mother.
I can't count the number of times when the kids commented at a younger age, "Daddy, you're following satan." Who told you that, guys? Mom, of course. She villifies me when I've done nothing, fills them with all sorts of lies. It's the woman she became, not the one I married. A hurtful, hateful, evil bitch. If I tried to play that game, to use the kids against her, in any way, I would be no better. I refuse to go there.
So no, the kids will never see the legal papers, the court documents, the receipts. If they choose to hate her because of what they see with their own eyes in her house, if they make up their own mind, then they can decide for themselves...but on no account will that take place because of me.
Children are not weapons.
However, she is their mother. I can't take them away, however much they should be taken away. And not tomorrow, not ten, not twenty years from now am I going to villify their mother. Not even with the facts. I'm not looking to use the kids as my battle ground; they're innocents, and if they end up one day with a rosy picture of their mother, I'm not going to do anything to alter that. Why would I?
What if you were surprised with new evidence that your mother was a lying whore who used you and did all manner of things that shock the image you've held of her since child hood? For some that might lead to some serious psychological issues.
The woman is a bitch. If she were a dog, I'd have had her euthanized or shot years ago. But she isn't dog, and all I can do is take one day at a time. I don't get to see the kids unless I pay. The kids are afraid of her. They don't eat well. I buy them shoes and she throws them away, leaves them in junk that's literally falling apart. She refuses to seek medical attention for them.
A couple of years ago at a family wedding, three of them mysteriously showed up with my ex. One of the younger ones approached me while I was standing with my father and brother. Holding my leg and looking up at me he said, "Daddy, uncle chet beats me with a stick." Personally, I'd like to see "uncle chet" as the backdrop for the sillouette of a .44 front sight...along with the rest of them. I really would. But in today's society...in a land where child protective services won't lift a finger (told me straight up that without photographic evidence of head injuries or a dead body, they wouldn't even investigate)...what is one to do?
For now, I have the privilege of reminding them to listen to their mother, to encourage them to support her, to encourage them to be as good as they can be in the hopes that she won't scream at them or strike them. My own intervention will only lead to my incarceration, where I can do them no good at all. The law has no interest in the safety or welfare of the children, the judge who made these calls probably sits in expensive home when he's not ruining people's lives, completely free of any debits of conscience. A few seconds of his wasted time on the bench, and entire families will pay for decades with their lives.
They money I spend is nothing; it's inconsequential. At times it's been more than I bring in...often the total amount I've sent to here has exceeded my income, and I've hawked my few posessions. Headsets, firearms, my parachutes. Whatever I've had. The money is nothing, however. The children are everything, and short of taking the law into my own hands, completely out of my reach. I visit them, I try to give them stability and support...but a mother can do no wrong in the eyes of the court, and I am not their mother.
I can't count the number of times when the kids commented at a younger age, "Daddy, you're following satan." Who told you that, guys? Mom, of course. She villifies me when I've done nothing, fills them with all sorts of lies. It's the woman she became, not the one I married. A hurtful, hateful, evil bitch. If I tried to play that game, to use the kids against her, in any way, I would be no better. I refuse to go there.
So no, the kids will never see the legal papers, the court documents, the receipts. If they choose to hate her because of what they see with their own eyes in her house, if they make up their own mind, then they can decide for themselves...but on no account will that take place because of me.
Children are not weapons.
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Vector4fun
Well-known member
- Joined
- Jul 25, 2003
- Posts
- 796
Avbug,
Clarification, I never used the kids as a weapon. I still don't bad-mouth their mother. But I felt they had a right to know the truth too, (when they were old enough), about what I did and said, and what she did and said. I suppose each case is different, and to each his own. They all still have a relationship with their mother, and that's fine, I don't have any problem with that. But they also have a new relationship with me too, something she tried to poison at one time.
Clarification, I never used the kids as a weapon. I still don't bad-mouth their mother. But I felt they had a right to know the truth too, (when they were old enough), about what I did and said, and what she did and said. I suppose each case is different, and to each his own. They all still have a relationship with their mother, and that's fine, I don't have any problem with that. But they also have a new relationship with me too, something she tried to poison at one time.
A Squared
Well-known member
- Joined
- Nov 26, 2001
- Posts
- 3,006
avbug said:
Yeah, that's the rest of the story that I didn't mention in my first post. If a dad is paying his child support directly to the ex, the state never gets it's hands on the money. If they can classify the dad as delinquent, then they can take over collections. So there's another finacial incentive to classify paying fathers as being in arrears (when they are not), which by extension, is a finacial incentive for the agency to accept without question any story from the wife about payments not being made. Then of course there's the fines, another source of income for the state.
aeronautic1
Virgil_Tracy
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flyinlow67
Well-known member
- Joined
- Jul 8, 2004
- Posts
- 267
Avbug, I feel for ya brother.
I haven't seen my two oldest for 3 years now, but I have to keep paying and paying. Seems the state doesn't care the custodial parent is a scumbag who's only job skill was having kids and collecting child support.
I fell behind after I went to flight school and couldn't find a job after. (a week after 9/11) I found one but it only paid a third of what I was making before. Same support-a third the income=screwed.
I always paid what I could (half my check every two weeks) but the deficit got larger. Finally able to take her back to court and get it lowered but the state charges intrest on the back amount.
So to all those guys out there without kids or ex wives.........wait until you do before you go ripping us who are busting out a$$ to try to do whats right. Reserve it for the guys who put more effort into hiding from thier obligations than it would take to meet them.
I haven't seen my two oldest for 3 years now, but I have to keep paying and paying. Seems the state doesn't care the custodial parent is a scumbag who's only job skill was having kids and collecting child support.
I fell behind after I went to flight school and couldn't find a job after. (a week after 9/11) I found one but it only paid a third of what I was making before. Same support-a third the income=screwed.
I always paid what I could (half my check every two weeks) but the deficit got larger. Finally able to take her back to court and get it lowered but the state charges intrest on the back amount.
So to all those guys out there without kids or ex wives.........wait until you do before you go ripping us who are busting out a$$ to try to do whats right. Reserve it for the guys who put more effort into hiding from thier obligations than it would take to meet them.
FN FAL
Freight Dawgs Rule
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- 8,573
dondk
Don't you wish
- Joined
- Nov 25, 2001
- Posts
- 887
All states now charge interest as well as report to credit agencies.
Some states will allow you to put the arrears into a lien, while not the best option, it does stop the interest and stops the arrears from growing. You credit report with CS is gonna suck anyway, but at least you get to keep a little more in your pockets.
Some states will allow you to put the arrears into a lien, while not the best option, it does stop the interest and stops the arrears from growing. You credit report with CS is gonna suck anyway, but at least you get to keep a little more in your pockets.
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