funny van stories?

[FutureTEDpilot]

Back in my "Three Holer days at UAL" (ie..B727) we had a layover in MDT, and after what seemed to be a long wait for the van, it finally pulled up slamming on the brakes!!!! The driver, a 40 year old gal shouted to us "HURRY GET IN, IF WE DON'T HURRY WE WILL RUN OUT OF GAS!"

She then proceeded down the highway doing at least 80 MPH! When asked to slow down, she said again "If I don't hurry we will run out of gas!" We then passed the DAMN HOTEL!!! When we asked her why, she said again...."IF I DON'T GET TO THE GAS STATION SOON WE WILL RUN OUT OF GAS!"

I think she may have lived close to Three Mile Island!

P.S. I will let ANY crewmember ride in my van (except BLOWJET or any other SCAB outfit)

 

[Turtlesfly]

In BWI one time the van pulled up and the side sliding door was open . . . we thought maybe he just moved the van a few feet after dropping somebody else off (we weren't really paying attention, we just got outside) . . . .

. . . until we get in and he tells us that the handle/latch was broken in the open position and we actually drove to the hotel with the sliding door open . . . we passed people on the road and of course they gave us funny looks and we were scared somebody was going to fall out . . . . we were on the interstate for a while and everything . . .

. . . good times. Although, I think Jetstream and FutureTed pilot win!

 

[wmuflyguy]

What is it with people not sharing vans? Is it a company policy or just plane being a d*ck.

 

[808pilot]

we had this crazy van driver who insisted on informing us that she was a vegetarian......she also told us that she rescues animals and takes them home and patches them up....my captain and i are thinking stray dogs and such....wrong. she pulls over for rabbits, deer, coyotes, birds...you name it.....she then goes on to tell us that she'll even go so far as sleeping with them in her own bed......"oh yeah, its totally safe...i've only ever gotten a few ticks and a couple of chiggers from a deer once..." WTF!
my captain and i are losing it.......she then goes on to tell us that she is a recovering meth addict.....the van pulls up to the hotel and we are out the door before it stops.....
the following morning we go downstairs to get coffe and a bite to eat and low-and-behold that crazy b-tch is the one cooking breakfast......we didn't even trust the water......from then on after all the complaints the hotel just gives us a car and we drive ourselves........

 

[acaTerry]

We're in the van on the way to the airport in the far left lane of the interstate doing about 70 mph. The FA is in the front row, I'm in the middle, and my FO is sitting in back. I'm beginning to smell smoke and just as I'm about to say somehting my FO starts yelling "were on fire!" I look in the back seat and an electrical wire beneath the carpet is glowing red hot and has set the carpet on fire. The van is filling with smoke and we are all coughing. I yell at the lady driving to pull over. She makes her way the the right hand emergency lane and we all bale out of the van. I ran around to the back and started grabbing our bags and tossing them out on the side of the road. Meanwhile as the driver is calling the front desk on her Nextel my FO finds a fire extinguisher and attacks the fire. He comes out of the van with his uniform covered in white powder. A few minutes later the fire truck shows up followed by another van from the hotel. We duty in 30 minutes late and reaking of smoke but otherwise unscathed.

No No No, that was one of Trans States' ATR's you're thinking of...