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A little edited Chris Rock on the issue:

A man is basically as faithful as his options.
That's how faithful a man is,
no more, no less.
You see all these
fat Republican guys going:
''l would never do such a thing.
This is a travesty.''
l'm like, ''Nobody's trying to %^$# you.''
Ain't no -year-old girls
trying to %^$# Orrin Hatch.
Ain't nobody trying
to give Newt Gingrich some.
l don't give a %^$#, you ain't never
gonna hear Newt Gingrich go:
''Man, l wish these hoes
would back up off me.
''l wish they would just
back the %^$# up off me.''

Let a player play, %^$#!

That's right.
lt's dang near impossible
for a man to turn down sex.
lt's hard for a man to turn down sex.
We can stop chasing it,
and even that requires some rehab.
But it's hard for a man to stop.
lf it chases us, we can't run that fast.
lt's gonna catch us, we're like:
''%^$#, pulled a hamstring. You got me.''
You can't run that fast.
See, it's easy for women to turn down sex.
lt ain't %^$# for y'all to turn down sex.
lt ain't no thing for y'all to turn down sex.
Y'all like, ''Why can't you turn it down?
l do it all the time.
''Why can't you say no? l say no.''
See, it's easy for y'all. You know why?
'Cause every woman in here,
ever since you were ...
every guy you met
has been trying to %^$# you.
That's right.
Women are offered %^$# every day.
Every woman in here...
gets offered %^$# at least three times a week.

Three times a day, %^$#!

That's right,
every time a man's being nice to you...
all he's doing is offering %^$#.
That's all it is.
''Can l get that for you?
How about some %^$#?''

Nobody offers us %^$#.
We got to fend for ourselves.
We can't believe it when we get an offer.
We're like, ''%^$#, this is my lucky day.''
 
ASARJMan said:
What about you female pilots, how do you get laid on overnights?... ...The male F/a?...

Just a guess here, but probably not the male flight attendant.:erm:
 
Call the vet

My advise is go to the vet and get spayed. Worked great with my dog. He no longer wants to hump all the ugly bitches in the neighborhood. I bet your captains would appreciate it too, since you'll probably stop rubbing up on their legs.

Willy
 
Sig said:
No kidding, dang it. The hook left a sore, but its healing nicely!!

THE greatest piece of advice though is anyone who bangs a flight attendant is too lazy to jerk off.

You must have some VERY ugly flight attendants. (most are GREAT looking)....which explains why MOST pilots don't get them.
 
WatchYourElbows said:
You must have some VERY ugly flight attendants. (most are GREAT looking)....which explains why MOST pilots don't get them.

We have the hags and the hotties, and those that fall somewhere in between but are nuttier than a squirrel's squirter.

Our hottest ones are incredibly so- they are just biding their time and enjoying flight bennies before running back to school.
 
You sure do pidgeon hole people, don't you?

How would you know that every HOT f/a wants to go back to school? Do you know what every HOT pilot wants in his future too?

I also discovered on this thread that all f/a's are sluts! My poor husband, after 17 years of marriage I'm going to have to break it to him that I've been sleeping around.....too bad I don't remember doing that to him. And HIM, he's a Captain and has played the faithful card consistently too. Lucky for us, we are both sitting here, sipping wine and laughing are butts off over this thread.

Tip from us (the pilot/flight attendant parents of two), all people are different. All flight attendants and all pilots aren't sluts. AND a married pilot doing a single flight attendant does NOT make HER the slut.
 
WAHOO! I have been ground crew most of my career and Flight Operations now. Many of my friends are crew members at various carriers. Some are dating/have married other airline people. Some have married non airline people, others remain single and spend alot of time with various personages of the opposite sex. We're in an industry that takes all kinds. Unfortunatly all kinds apply and are granted employment here.
 
ASARJMan said:
What about you female pilots, how do you get laid on overnights?.... The male F/a? .....


HAHAHAHAHA. LMFAO!!!!! Its more likely that I'd bang Eva Longoria than for that to happen.
 
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FlyUnited said:
You sure do pidgeon hole people, don't you?

How would you know that every HOT f/a wants to go back to school? Do you know what every HOT pilot wants in his future too?

Easy, tigress. In that post, I am actually talking about two of the most engaging, witty, drop-dead-gorgeous, mature and downright neat women I've met in a long time. Both of them are returning to school this summer, biding their time here.

Simmah down.
 
dollacrackho said:
i have a similar problem i live next to a farm and am really attracted to sheep. i try to ignore them but the come up to the fence and "baaaa baaa" and i get so turned on. i dont want to cheat on my wife but there is nothing like good sheep poontang. i've talked to my captains about it but they offer no help. just yesterday i got involved in a sheep three way and i feel so guilty . my wife knows something is up she walked in on me pleasuring myself to livestock illustrated the other day. please can anyone help me i'm out of control!!!! i've even begun cross dressing as a sheep. help me lord!!!


ROFLMAO dude !!!! Damn, you owe me a new beer!! I spit it out laughing my ass off. That was great, keep m comming.
 
You gotta get outta the reginal airlines, they have all the hot, young F/A's. Just go fly for AA, they dont have a F/A under 80...that should solve your problems (unless you are into that kinda thing, then you have some really serious problems)
 
LOL reminds me of a converstation with an AA guy last year, while I was waiting for my ride in DFW.

(after 15 mins of talking)

AA pilot: How old are you?
me: 21
AA pilt: Do you have a g/f ? how old is she ?
me: 24
AA pilot: man I hate you, All my fa's including my wife are over 95

hahaha
 
FlyUnited said:
Tip from us (the pilot/flight attendant parents of two), all people are different. All flight attendants and all pilots aren't sluts. AND a married pilot doing a single flight attendant does NOT make HER the slut.
So you mean a single pilot doing a married flight attendant restores the pilot to unslut status in your book? Hmmm, you would have made a good pilot.

Question: What separates a couple of sluts and a couple of drunks?

Answer: A cockpit door
 
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pilotmyf said:
You should check out this guys other posts,
What a tool!!!!!!!!!!!

WMT-

Seriously, your posts seam to indicate you are an islamic, suicidal, man-whore. Honestly, I would be very nervous to have to fly with you. I don't know a nicer way to say this other than to say you should probably consider getting out of flying altogether. I seriously question your behavior and emotional state of mind.

Good luck.
 
Last edited:
I fly for Horizon.

I know most of you that work at Horizon know who i am so its no biggy.

What does religion have to do with this. I know people from all walks of life who have cheated.
 
WMT said:
I am running into problems with flight attendants that i have put myself into. This is not to be flame bait but it is a serious question.

I am married but have had numerous sexual encounters with flight attendants. When i say numerous i am talking about 10 per year. This also does not include the females i meet in overnight at the hotel bar and i even met some in the elevators on the way to my room. I am not the best looking guy but average looking. The girls that i have had encounters with are pretty good looking and some are mormon and married.

Lately, i have attempted to change my ways and be honest to my wife. I have done everything possible to be faithful and i just get the urge to meet new people or hook up with the flight attendants. I have even tried locking my self up in the room and not to come out.

My question is that i know i have messed up and am very depressed on my cheating ways. I am putting myself through counselling. Lately, i have told the flight attendants that i saw in the past that i am no longer interested and we should stay friends. These same FA have told me that they dont care that i am married and what happens on lay overs stays on lay overs. I know that i am venting but does any one else have experienced the same thing as me and what was the outcome?

Again, i made numerous mistakes and am changing my life for the better. I have been depressed about it and would do anything to change my ways.

thank you for listening.

Just lop your dick off. That should help.
 

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