Diarrhea in a freighter?

[Hogprint]

How have I missed this all these years...

There was one ( it might be mentioned here but I can’t wade through 29 pages) story of a “Tyler Wojo” who shat himself in the cockpit. It was one of the funniest things I’ve read. I was crying reading it and waiting on crew van. I got some strange looks that day!

 

[jetwash]

Here goes my story told to me by Big Mikey who wanted to warn other pilots about thinking they could hold it in until you land.
First of all Mikey is about 320 lbs and is flying a Beechjet, the kind that does not have a flushable lav but just the Honey Pot. That morning he had some catering which was probably made the night before and left out.
Anyway, he starts to get that funny feeling in his gut and it is getting painful as the flight goes on. He has only 30 minutes left in the flight and thanks he can hold it in but starts to get the sweats and decides that he can’t Wait anymore and decides to do the walk of shame through the small cabin of a couple with their 2 teenage daughters on board.

As he was moving to the back everything was staring to move towards his outflow valve.
He said the small Lav didn’t have any room for him to move quickly, he was able to get his uniform pants down before it all started to come out into his underwater and blowout onto the tail of his white shirt. He says everyone in the aircraft heard the blowout. One of the passengers was just on the other side of the door not more then 12 inches where all the activity was taking place. He tried to clean up as much as he could but ended up leaving the underwear in the LAV and going commando. The stained shirt was cleaned up and tucked deep down into his pants.
He says he got out and apologized to the passengers telling them he had food poisoning and went back to the cockpit to find his FO with his O2 mask on.
He then proceeded to call off sick and finished his day early.

He tells this story to everyone just so they know that if you gotta go, just go, don’t wait until it is too late like he did. He said had he got up 5 minutes earlier it would not have been an issue but now it is another story on this thread.

 

[jetwash]

This thread must not die it must be preserved for future generation.

 

[belchfire]

It's worth reading all 29 pages-put a six pack on ice and camp out with your 'puter for a few hours. It's far more rewarding than Farcebook or Twatter but be warned-bring a towel because sure as sh1t you're going to spray beer out of your nose laughing!!!

 

[SpatialD]

I haven't been on this site in years--even longer since I last looked at this thread (think I posted here sometime in '05!) I can't believe it's still going. Someone needs to turn it into a book and publish it... I mean, wow.

 

[Juan Trippe]

I've noticed a slight slowdown in the thread since the good 'ol days. What a document this has become! Or, is it an official manual now? Another round for everyone at the 'ol Sandbar.

 

[FlyBigE]

this thread is gold. can't believe I just found it.

I had the grumblies going on something fierce. It wasn't going away and getting worse. I asked the captain I was with to land. He called the company via a relay through another company airplane. That pilot thought it would be funny to say no, the freight must get there. We flew out of range before he could relay the message it was ok to divert. I made it another hour +, curled up in my seat, chewing Imodium and praying. We made it to destination, I went in and I just about died in the men's room for the next 30 minutes. I can only imagine what the staff thought when the my arse sounded like an A10 every 30 seconds...BRRRRTT...

 

[FlyBigE]

IMO its not a IF its a WHEN will you have to to do the walk of shame or worse...