Diarrhea in a freighter?

[Frank Towns]

Who has had the squittals in the cockpit, and what did you do about it?

 

[ATRCAPT]

I'm a member of the trash can club.

 

[fokkers&beer]

I'm the president. The worst thing about it is trying to get rid of the bag.

 

[rchcfi]

Actually not flying a freighter, but this summer I was on a wildland fire for a 4 hour shift. About 3 hours in here it came. Luckily, my BLM buddy in the seat next to me didn't want to see what came next, so he told me it was ok to go find someplace to land. On a side note, one Immodium capsule later and I couldn't purge for a few days. Crap, that stuff is strong!

 

[NightFlyer]

I just go to the lav.


NightFlyer

 

[DenverDude2002]

I'll second the immodium ad, works wonders

 

[kilroy]

I dam^ near over dosed on immodiom before because qot a case of the squirts in a small corporate jet with 4 pax. Try that for fun running to the back of the plane so you can do your business in a small bucket with a curtain between u and your pax...

 

[fr8r]

I call it the "Tremors"

I had an experience one time when I was flying checks... I just remember thinking that I should hit the bathroom (before takeoff) as there was a little pressure opposing my o-ring. I decided, because I was a good employee , that getting there ASAP was better. So I left for the 1 hour flight and about 25 minutes into it, the "TREMORS" started... went away after 5 min, came back a few minutes later and lasted @ 7 min... etc. They kept getting worse. I nearly punched a grumpy in my pants on short final! I never taxied and parked so fast in my whole career. I had a friend who was less fortunate... He had the same problem and thought he was gonna make it. He then decided to make an unschedualed landing enroute and had a blowout on final. He went to the bathroom and cleeaned up his mess, but everyone on the ramp new what happened, because he made such a big mess in his pants (he was wearing Khaki shorts!). Anyhow, his name is... just kidding hahaha! True story though.

 

[FL000]

I dam^ near over dosed on immodiom before because qot a case of the squirts in a small corporate jet with 4 pax. Try that for fun running to the back of the plane so you can do your business in a small bucket with a curtain between u and your pax...

Howzabout on a Lear? A buddy of mine had to ask a pax to MOVE from the front seat so he could "give birth" on the potty seat...no curtain.

 

[FearlessFreep]

Ah, you might be able to hold #1 but when the urge to purge is upon you there is only a limited amount of time that you have before the ultimate download occurs.

When flying freight in the small birds (had some long flights of 4 to 6 hours in duration) always carried a Brief Relief bag for #1, and I had made up several Emergency Paks for the big brown #2. This consisted of a number of small white plastic shopping bags doubled or tripled up. Wads of TP are enclosed for those necessary cleanup jobs. I set these up after I heard of a guy whose overwhelming powerful urge compelled him to take care of business in a brandy new very expensive leather flightbag.

Now what to do with it? Easy! That handy little DV window. Just make sure you slow down so that your little delivery doesn't smack any part of the airplane lest you have anything else to clean up upon landing. Those shopping bags will degrade pretty quickly so environmental concerns are a minimum. Just make sure your over an un-populated area. Now you really are the brown bomber! Oh well, let the sh*t fall where it may!

One more thing - if your in an aircraft without an autopilot and your IFR make sure to call up and get a 2000' block alititude!