Annoying crap the CA/FO does

[~~~^~~~]

3. I'll buy the first round, how drunk you get beyond that is totally up to you.

But at least call crew scheduling from the jail so I don't have to get up early for the duty in.

 

[ohplease!]

Today in age there are just tooooo many "right seat captain" idiots that think they know better. Wether you like it or not the Captain is still in charge and you are HIS FO/Second in command. He/She is still your superior. Grow up. Oh an by the way, don't run a checklist, call the airport insight, or call traffic insight until you have looked to your left and said "ready for the check list/You see it? I've got the traffic, do you see it?"

nonsense! If you are in MY right seat, you should know when a checklist is due......do it already. If you see it, I see it....

Just don't be in such a damn hurry to do stuff...relax, slow down and enjoy yourself.....

Damned hyper kids.

 

[Dumb Pilot]

Damned hyper kids.

This gen X, PFT crowd just want to make meuke:

 

[Flybet3]

nonsense! If you are in MY right seat, you should know when a checklist is due......do it already. If you see it, I see it....

Just don't be in such a damn hurry to do stuff...relax, slow down and enjoy yourself.....

Damned hyper kids.

You nutsack! :laugh:

 

[Crossky]

Flew with a FA who freaked out because I used her name in the PA announcement ("Mary, prepare the cabin for takeoff.") Said it was inviting men to flirt with her.

So I stopped using FA's names.

A week later, another FA freaked out because I didn't use her name. ("Jeez, like, saying 'Flight Attendant' sounds so sterile, impersonal")

Any ideas here? I;m ready to go Postal on the next FA who b*tches to me about anything!

hah! I'm too lazy to read the rest of this thread, gotta rake some leaves in the sunset. But that's good!

Actually time has taught me to ASK the FA whether it's OK (what do they prefer) for me to say her/his name on the PA, it works, they'll tell you if they're opposed to it.

Also, I try to vary my brief to FO's based on how the first few minutes of interaction with them are.

 

[Salukipilot4590]

This gen X, PFT crowd just want to make meuke:

HEY! I'm glad to let you know that I didnt PFT!

 

[Crossky]

Today in age there are just tooooo many "right seat captain" idiots that think they know better. Wether you like it or not the Captain is still in charge and you are HIS FO/Second in command. He/She is still your superior. Grow up. Oh an by the way, don't run a checklist, call the airport insight, or call traffic insight until you have looked to your left and said "ready for the check list/You see it? I've got the traffic, do you see it?"

Amen, I second those motions.

 

[LowlyPropCapt]

Amen, I second those motions.

Third!

Calling traffic has always been a personal pet peeve of mine...

ATC: PDT 4000, traffic 10 O'Clock 10 miles an airbus southwest bound at 15,000.

FO to ATC: (Staring into a night sky positively FILLED with blinking lights) Traffic in sight!

ME: Chill out there eagle eye. Do you have any actual idea which one of those blinking lights is the airbus in question?

FO: Uhhh...

Hint of the day:

Never call traffic in sight unless:
1. You are absolutely sure you have the airplane in sight and can maintain visual seperation.
2. You are absolutely sure that the other pilot (CA or FO) also has the traffic in sight and agrees that visual seperation can be maintained.
3. There is some operational advantage to be gained by you (or the traffic in question- It is good to be courteous after all) by assuming the responsibility of keeping yourself seperated from the aforementioned traffic.

That is all!

 

[pilotdiscretion]

1. I am not "your FO". Please do not refer to the guy you are flying with as "my FO". Same goes to FA's.

Hundreds of years ago the Spanish navy figured out that if a captain took "ownership" of the vessel and crew they took better care of them. My ship and my crew builds a sense of connection to them and the captains made better decisions. The concept spread to every facet of command and leadership around the world and quickly worked its way into the airlines when the majority of pilots began coming from the military.

When the captain refers to the airplane as "that hunk of junk" and the FO as "the dbag who sits next to me" you need to know that when the sh!t hits the fan you are expendable to the captain. Its the captain who refers to you as "my" that will not only have your best interests in mind during the evacuation but will stick with you through the civil suit.

 

[prtyprtyprncss]

Enough time has passed, it's ready to start a new CA vs. FO thread.​

To the CA's:
1. I am not "your FO". Please do not refer to the guy you are flying with as "my FO". Same goes to FA's.
2. When you call for a Checklist, you should actually be ready to respond to it. Me: "T/O data and Speeds", CA: fumbles around for 2 minutes trying to set speeds....then, "Set".
3. Quit centering the heading bug when I am flying. I promise you, the plane will not veer violently off course if the heading bug is 3 degrees to the left.
4. I could care less about your church or your kids. Seriously... Religion and Kids can stay at home.
5. Don't leave your friggin flight case on the floor behind the center pedestal. Put it in the damn place beside your seat. No, I don't like scrambling over your bag every time I step into/out of the cockpit.

6. Are you wearing cowboy boots?​

If you were a captain then you could dictate all of the above...however, you're not...so,

1. You ARE the captain's FO. Whether you're the FA's FO is up to you (after the captain has "dibs").
2. The captain calls for the checklist when he wants it...maybe he calls early anticipating that by the time YOU are ready, he will be!
3. Why aren't YOU keeping the bug centered? That's professionalism, and at our carrier, SOP.
4. Have you told the captain that you are a godless pagan with no children, or are you just hoping he'll see this and you won't have to grow a set and speak up?
5. The entire airplane is the captain's while his/her name is in the book...the chart bag placement is his/her call...maybe he/she wants you to trip over it and sprain your ankle so he/she can get an FO whose easier to be around.
6. The question would be, if you ever flew with me..."are you wearing a cup"? 'cause I'd have kicked you in the stones well before item #6!

 

[prtyprtyprncss]

wrong quote...sure want credit to go where it's due!

 

[prtyprtyprncss]

Nah, I agree with the original poster.

Bottom line: in an environment with RIFs, NASA reports, and especially ASAP reports, step on your FO enough, and really bad things can happen to your career.


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

Let me answer that with the same statement your creepy uncle used when you were 5..."who do you think they'll believe?...me or you?"

Bring it sonny!

 

[CFI2766]

Let me answer that with the same statement your creepy uncle used when you were 5..."who do you think they'll believe?...me or you?"

Bring it sonny![/quote]


Your reading comprehension isn't that great, is it?

I'll guess that whenever you are the PIC of anything, the most dangerous malfunction on the A/C is the crack in the left seat...

 

[JustaNumber]

If you were a captain then you could dictate all of the above...however, you're not...so,

1. You ARE the captain's FO. Whether you're the FA's FO is up to you (after the captain has "dibs").
2. The captain calls for the checklist when he wants it...maybe he calls early anticipating that by the time YOU are ready, he will be!
3. Why aren't YOU keeping the bug centered? That's professionalism, and at our carrier, SOP.
4. Have you told the captain that you are a godless pagan with no children, or are you just hoping he'll see this and you won't have to grow a set and speak up?
5. The entire airplane is the captain's while his/her name is in the book...the chart bag placement is his/her call...maybe he/she wants you to trip over it and sprain your ankle so he/she can get an FO whose easier to be around.
6. The question would be, if you ever flew with me..."are you wearing a cup"? 'cause I'd have kicked you in the stones well before item #6!

Classic!

My main problem with the original poster is, he seems to be a very bitter employee, with poor communication skills. Is that the kind of guy you want up front safeguarding your wife and kids in the back? Sure, we all have a few pet peeves, but jeez, speak up if you really have a problem with something! In multiple CRM studies, the best and safest crews were ones that communicated well with each other. Better yet, just do it the way the captain wants it, with a smile on your face, unless it's unsafe or not SOP. We've all done it, welcome to the right seat. Can't we all just be professionals?!?

 

[Grey Ghost]

4. I could care less about your church or your kids. Seriously... Religion and Kids can stay at home.​

?​

If you "could care less" then do it! It's, I couldn't care less! Crack a book once in a while, you Idiot!

 

[Axel]

FO's:

Start the checklist before it is requested.

No "checklist complete" callout.

Recite checklist from memory without actually ever touching the paper.

Retract flaps prior to clearing the runway.

Perform SOP tasks assigned to other pilot.

Reconfigure systems and/or aircraft without advising the other pilot.

Landing way long and way slow seeking the elusive "greaser."

Being smug about the "better" landings because the CA would rather land on speed in the touchdown zone than grease it on way long and way slow.

General complacency based on status as "two year FO."

CA:

Dogmatic insistence on SOP compliance.

Unnecessary callouts, such as "Ref minus 10, 4000 feet remaining."

Countermanding impulsive decisions/actions.

Attempting to "instruct."

Doing things slowly

 

[Raskal]

...FO's:

Retract flaps prior to clearing the runway...

I don't usually get in on these threads, but I gotta agree on that one.

At my airline (yup, it's not just "my" fo it's my airline too ) a number of the FO's, through no fault of their own in many cases, are positively obsessed with the gust lock and are often reaching for the damn thing as soon as the mains are down. Has to be the most annoying and retarded thing I've ever seen in an airplane.

 

[jamiestrat]

Hey Raskal, are you referring to our flight back into DTW yesterday evening?? I pull the gust lock whenever the captain wants me to, but yes I agree that it is totally retarded to pull it at all when still on the runway, but you would be surprised at how many captains willingly give up their rudder authority at 60 plus knots

 

[Bluestreak]

FO's:

Start the checklist before it is requested.

No "checklist complete" callout.

Recite checklist from memory without actually ever touching the paper.

Retract flaps prior to clearing the runway.

Perform SOP tasks assigned to other pilot.

Reconfigure systems and/or aircraft without advising the other pilot.

Landing way long and way slow seeking the elusive "greaser."

Being smug about the "better" landings because the CA would rather land on speed in the touchdown zone than grease it on way long and way slow.

General complacency based on status as "two year FO."

CA:

Dogmatic insistence on SOP compliance.

Unnecessary callouts, such as "Ref minus 10, 4000 feet remaining."

Countermanding impulsive decisions/actions.

Attempting to "instruct."

Doing things slowly

You forgot some:
F/O's:

When we are an hour late,don't sit on your azz after we get on the gate texting on your crackberry for 15 minutes.If the pax are boarded and you still haven't done your walk-around ,that's not good.

In the same vein:When we're trying to get back on sched,don't show up 20 minutes after you left to do your walk around with stuff from Villa Pizza.

Don't take it personally when I wonder why you land in the middle of an 11,000' runway and we make the last turn off.You're just incompetent.

I know you were the shiznit at "the academy",but when you're still at 8,000 feet on the downwind,descending at 500' FPM at 250 kts.,maybe you should wonder why the controller seems concerned when he says "expect a base turn in one mile".


I know it's a big step up from a Seminole,but this airplane has a "yoke",and it works the same way.I know-insane ! So if looks like you're not gonna make a crossing restriction,you can actually FLY THE AIRPLANE instead of twisting knobs and punching buttons!

When we're closed up 15 early,do not let off the parking brake while I'm making my PA.Where did you get the idea you can even touch the parking brake,anyway ?

No-hair gel and backpacks and Livestrong bracelets are not covered by your uniform allowance.

This is from actual experience.Except that last one.

 

[Raskal]

Hey Raskal, are you referring to our flight back into DTW yesterday evening?? I pull the gust lock whenever the captain wants me to, but yes I agree that it is totally retarded to pull it at all when still on the runway, but you would be surprised at how many captains willingly give up their rudder authority at 60 plus knots

LOL, of course not! As I mentioned, in most cases it really isn't the FO's fault-it's what they were conditioned to do by other guys...

Enjoying one of your 38 days off this month?