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Some c5 hatin...

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Otto77

Snacko
Joined
Aug 21, 2005
Posts
361
...and now it's time for a little bit of C-5 hatin'....

"Crew, attention to the takeoff briefing. This will be a rolling, TRT,
military reject, unless we get airborne, in which case we'll declare an
emergency and start the "main gear failure to retract" checklist.

In case anyone does NOT see a safety of flight malfunction prior to
reaching "go" speed, shout "GO-GO-GO" loudly and enthusiastically, and
jump seat, you get on the radio and cancel the redball for jackstands.

In the likely event we have to abort the takeoff, we'll stop straight
ahead on the runway, egress the aircraft, and meet 200 feet off the
nose, where the copilot will enlist the help of the U.S. Census Bureau
to locate and count off the members of the crew, and possibly the
passengers if they have any time left.

Copilot, before raising the gear or actuating any switch or control,
ensure that TACC has been informed of our intentions and concurs with
all intended actions.

Flying time on this leg will be 5 hours with the gear up, or 8 hours
with the gear stuck down. If the destination weather goes below VFR,
we'll divert because AMC crews aren't allowed to fly the NDB approach
everyone else is flying there.

The forecast does call for severe clear icing on the climbout, but the
airman forecasting at the weather hub over a thousand miles away at
Scott says not to worry because the hail will probably knock the ice off
the wings anyway.

We'd plan on flying the same SID all the major airlines are using for
departure, but we didn't have two weeks advance notice to have the AMC
TERPS guys review it for us and get two-star approval to fly it. Instead
we'll get radar vectors that mirror the same SID we're not allowed to
fly, and depart with an enhanced sense of safety.

If there are no questions, that concludes the brief."
 
...and now it's time for a little bit of C-5 hatin'....

"Crew, attention to the takeoff briefing. This will be a rolling, TRT,
military reject, unless we get airborne, in which case we'll declare an
emergency and start the "main gear failure to retract" checklist.

In case anyone does NOT see a safety of flight malfunction prior to
reaching "go" speed, shout "GO-GO-GO" loudly and enthusiastically, and
jump seat, you get on the radio and cancel the redball for jackstands.

In the likely event we have to abort the takeoff, we'll stop straight
ahead on the runway, egress the aircraft, and meet 200 feet off the
nose, where the copilot will enlist the help of the U.S. Census Bureau
to locate and count off the members of the crew, and possibly the
passengers if they have any time left.

Copilot, before raising the gear or actuating any switch or control,
ensure that TACC has been informed of our intentions and concurs with
all intended actions.

Flying time on this leg will be 5 hours with the gear up, or 8 hours
with the gear stuck down. If the destination weather goes below VFR,
we'll divert because AMC crews aren't allowed to fly the NDB approach
everyone else is flying there.

The forecast does call for severe clear icing on the climbout, but the
airman forecasting at the weather hub over a thousand miles away at
Scott says not to worry because the hail will probably knock the ice off
the wings anyway.

We'd plan on flying the same SID all the major airlines are using for
departure, but we didn't have two weeks advance notice to have the AMC
TERPS guys review it for us and get two-star approval to fly it. Instead
we'll get radar vectors that mirror the same SID we're not allowed to
fly, and depart with an enhanced sense of safety.

If there are no questions, that concludes the brief."

Umm - what is the point here? That you guys talk way too much prior to take off?
 
Beautiful. Simply Beautiful.

If you see three C-5s on the ramp and two are on jacks, what's the problem?

They ran out of jacks.
 
Scrapdog skips every checklist known to mankind. Granted, fighter checklists take about 6.9 seconds to go through, but I'm pretty pretty sure Scrapdog skips them all.

As for you heavy guys.....checklists are stupid. :)
 
Before anyone freaks out, I'm actually one of the few fighter guys that actually does checklists.

I no-sh*t verbalize to my lone-idiot self in the cockpit everytime I throw the gear down "Handle down, 3 green, good hydraulics, speed brake out."

I got that from my UPT roommate. I no longer use the S/B in my jet, but it's a good habit.
 
Q: What's the max service ceiling of the C-5??
A: The height of the tail, plus the height of the jacks.
 
Magnum - the big question is do you leave the hot mike on so you don't feel alone? I'll admit I did for my frist few solo rides in tweets till my IP brought it up. As far as "heavy" checklists go - nw rumor is we're going to flows (that is until the next O-6 needs an OPR bullet and decides to "introduce" checklists as an enhancement to safety)
 
Otto77;1408573In the likely event we have to abort the takeoff said:
200 feet off the[/COLOR]
nose, where the copilot will enlist the help of the U.S. Census Bureau
to locate and count off the members of the crew, and possibly the
passengers if they have any time left.

I'd get further away than 200' from that POS.
 
Magnum - the big question is do you leave the hot mike on so you don't feel alone?

I don't think I can fly cold mic! Tried it a couple times, but I guess I like hearing myself breathe. Of course, you learn to be judicious in your comments lest you drop an F-bomb in your tape about the OG flying on your wing.
 
lest you drop an F-bomb in your tape about the OG flying on your wing

F**k 'im . . . .
 
I'd get further away than 200' from that POS.

I like how guys set a number of feet or yards off of the nose to egress.
A) I'm not counting paces as I get out of Dodge.
B) If I've got hot cargo in the back and the jet's on fire, I'm going to the next county.

The best line I've heard while briefing the egress is, "Run until you feel stupid."
 
Great post! For those of use who have flown FRED know the love/hate relationship with its well established MX history. That being said, when FRED arrives anywhere, everyone stop to watch...of course the crash crews with all the lights helps to let everyone know we're on the way in. Seriously, it's the best ride in the AF, and someday, even a C-17 guy can graduate to the Varsity.
 
As a lifelong C-17 guy (13+) years I fondly remember being Barney (Freds little friend) following the big guy on the strat path around the globe. Unfortunately somewhere along the way that dang little herky guy spilled his tac in my start and things ain't never gonna be the same. Oh sure there's the occaisional good deal now and then but for the most part its back and forth playing in the sandbox with the rest of the tacsters watching that truey magnificent beast of an airplane take it's crew's from hotel to hotel (sometimes hotel florida) and while a three day mission might turn into 12 I wonder if it is a better life than 120 deployed or yet another NVG local trying to better my skills and keep up with the 4 fan ----- can. - so no more hatin' and lets bring back the T-Tail mafia like it should be - off base - max per diem - and no more tents!!

Just my 2 cents
 

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