Welcome to Flightinfo.com

  • Register now and join the discussion
  • Friendliest aviation Ccmmunity on the web
  • Modern site for PC's, Phones, Tablets - no 3rd party apps required
  • Ask questions, help others, promote aviation
  • Share the passion for aviation
  • Invite everyone to Flightinfo.com and let's have fun

Redneck Pilot

Welcome to Flightinfo.com

  • Register now and join the discussion
  • Modern secure site, no 3rd party apps required
  • Invite your friends
  • Share the passion of aviation
  • Friendliest aviation community on the web

bailout

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 28, 2001
Posts
988
I'm sure this has gone around, but here ya go..

You May Be A Redneck Pilot If...

... your stall warning plays "Dixie."

... your cross-country flight plan uses flea markets as check points.

... you think sectionals charts should show trailer parks.

... you've ever used moonshine as avgas.

... you have mud flaps on your wheel pants.

... you think GPS stands for going perfectly straight.

... your toothpick keeps poking your mike.

... you constantly confuse Beechcraft with Beechnut.

... just before impact, you are heard saying, "Hey y'all, watch this!"

... you have a black airplane with a big #3 on the side.

... you've ever just taxied around the airport drinking beer.

... you use a Purina feed bag for a windsock.

... you fuel your wizzbang 140 from a Mason jar.

... you wouldn't be caught dead flyin' a Grumman "Yankee."

... you refer to flying in formation as "We got ourselves a convoy!"

... there is a sign on the side of your aircraft advertising your septic
tank service.

... when you are the owner of Red Neck Airlines and pilot of Redneck
One.

... you subscribe to The Southern Aviator because of the soft paper!

... you have ever incorporated sheetrock into the repair of your
aircraft.

... you have ever responded to ATC with the phrase "That's a big 10-4!"

... you typically answer female controllers with titles like "sugar" or
"little darlin'."

... she responds with the words "Honey" or "Big guy" then she may be a
redneck.

... you have ever used a relief tube as a spittoon.

... you glance down at your belt buckle to help you remember your
N-number.

... you have ever tried to impress your girlfriend by buzzing her
doublewide.

... the preprinted portion of your weight and balance sheet contains
"Case
of Bud."

... your go/no-go checklist includes the words "Skoal" or "Redman."
 
redneck list rewritten

dude:

that's pretty lame ....sound like jerry clower or jeff foxworthy wrote it..

so, here's the revised one:

you may be a redneck pilot if:

1) your suitcase contains a roll of toilet paper ( from the hotel)

2) tens bags of pretzels, five bags of oatmeal(from the hotel)

3) you decided to just wear one shirt per week. screw it , they don't pay you enough!
(as long as it don't stink)
4) you greet controllers with " how ya doin?"

5) you leave with "Seeeeeeee Ya"

6) one of your socks don't match

7) your underwear has a skidmark from yesterday.

8) there's enough change in you suitcase to get you half the way home

9) you basically grin ,knod your head and go " yeah man" to whatever the captain says.

10) when you grease one on, you ndon't don't say a word and yoou wait ever so patiently for the lame captain your with to call "after landing"
 
plunger, you go to my flight school? or was that my spitter everyone keeps referring to.
 
Bump...

This one is too good to leave it in the dustbin.
 
you forgot- leaving your spitter in the cockpit. or maybe that's just us GA guys.

hahaha dude...thats everywhere ya go....i ussually try and make space for a two liter bottle in my flight case so i can just bend over and let the nectar of the gods take its natural course.....mmm mmm SKOAL!
 
... you've ever just taxied around the airport drinking beer.
I represent that
- leaving your spitter in the cockpit.
that to
you greet controllers with " how ya doin?"
and that.

Do you know what a Yankee is?
It's like a quickie, but you do it by yourself.

The South will rise again!! Yee Haw!!!
 
I'm not allowed to forget mine. But if they just installed some damned spitoons instead of cupholders, in which nothing fits anyhow, I wouldn't have to worry about it.
 

Latest resources

Back
Top Bottom