Tower - Beech 99 we're a "HEAVY" today

[NJA bound]

Quote from a thread on the cargo forum, funniest thing I've read in awhile, passing it on. http://forums.flightinfo.com/showthread.php?p=1244584#post1244584

What a great thread.... I will add one...

Many years back I was a F/O on a BE-99. We were in line number 4 or 5 out of about 20 or so for take-off in MCO, when my Captain puts his hand on his chin and goes into a deep thought process. I asked him if everything was ok? He looks and me and say's "oh gezz, well you had best let the tower know that we are HEAVY" I said, What? He said, "yea, we are at max takeoff weight and that he did not want to upset the Delta 757 behind us". I said, yea thats funny. He looked right back at me and said "I am not kidding, Listen I want to get hired over there at Delta and I want to look good in front of their pilots". I said I tell you what, you tell the tower that, I dont want to sound stupid on the radio. Well this jerk -off get's on the radio and say's, "Tower this #### 2546 HEAVY, we are ready for take off, just want to give you some notice, we are a HEAVY today so please let the Delta 757 behind us know, and that he will have to offset the runway after takeoff".

Dude we are in a BE-99 !!! It only weighs 11,500 pounds !!!

You should have heard all the comments on the tower freq. I laughed at this guy so hard, I actually pissed my pants.

After all the laughter was over and we took off, the tower says, ####2546 Heavy! Contact Departure !!!! You could hear the controler laughing his azz off.

And yes, you guessed it. We called departure control and even they had heard about our HEAVY BE-99 !!!OH MY I could not even talk on the radio I was crying laughing so hard.

Sorry about the spelling didnt have time to check it..

 

[Guitar rocker]

Thats a funny one. A few years ago I was flying with this one dude (who was actually a really nice guy) and we are going into JFK. The passengers that we had were trying to catch a BA flight out that night and it woulda been best if we got 13R as that is the closest runway to the FBO....nice to have but we all know how the system works. Anyway, we are with BOS center and about 250 miles out from JFK. He asks me to tell center to throw in the request for 13R. Again....... just to recap the distance here.....250 miles out. I said, ahhhhhhhhh, dude.....you sure you want me to do THAT? So we asked and there was a long pause on the frequency. Controller was being really nice and said, you'll have to ask for that down the road, and I am thinking WAY down the road. I knew what the controller wanted to say and had a feeling that we were just a bunch of smack asses for asking THAT.

 

[ozpilot]

Reminds me of when I was an FO at Comair. Descending into CVG on a beautiful day 50 miles from the airport the Captains asks me to request a visual. I look at the TCAS - a lot of aircraft between us and the airport - but he insists and so I make the request.

Controller responds with "When you have the 30 aircraft in front of you in sight let me know, until then fly planned route..."

 

[Guitar rocker]

Kinda like if your at a big airport and #5 in line, why would you call the tower and tell em your ready? Does that mean your gonna put it in 4 wheel drive and plow on through so as to be #1 in line?

 

[BcPilot99]

I responded to myself as a heavy once in a 182.....but of course one of the skydivers I was flying chickened out and rode the plane down....

 

[Rubber Ducky]

Cheetah Gulfstream four zero hotel

I was flying a Grumman Cheetah that was actually manufactured by Gulfstream so I called an fbo 10 minutes out calling myself a gulfstream. you should have seen the greeting I received when I arrived.

 

[Way2Broke]

Yup, I start some good threads... haha